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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

For those having a crap Christmas- come here and rant

241 replies

ReformedWaywardTeen · 25/12/2022 11:12

Just that really.

Mine are:
Yet again, no Christmas gift from DH. He's had weeks. Ive literally done everything else, every gift, every bit of food planning, been cooking since Friday for it. Not one fucking thing.

My house is damp and crappy, landlord is a wanker so no point asking him as he'd already made comments about our rent being way under the value for houses in the area. Despite the fact the only thing the tosser does each year is a gas check and we've lived here ten years. So I went to put something nice on today as I live in jeans and never go out really bar to the supermarket, to find my tights have rotted through due to damp. The back of the drawer they were in is disgusting but I didn't realise as it's not a drawer in regular use. So now, fuck all to wear.

I have anxiety about my looks anyway due to my toxic mum who used to call me the ugly sister to my younger half sister. I always think people wonder why DH is with me when I'm fat, ugly and useless, or so my brain tells me, so now when everyone else looks nice I feel like a joke.

DD very obviously didn't like their gifts. It's difficult to know what to get them as they're an older teen, and don't conform to typical teen fashion from PLT and the likes. They barely smiled at anything but have said it was all nice they just don't have to jump around about gifts as they're not a little kid anymore.

DS is unwell with a cold. He's really trying to get in the spirit but can tell he'd rather be in bed bless him.

So yes, if you're having a shit time and can't say anything to your nearest and dearest, say it here.

OP posts:
mdh2020 · 25/12/2022 11:21

DH is not well. He was in hospital for a couple of days at the beginning of the week. He’s still in his dressing gown and is refusing to come to DM(she’s very elderly) and was rude to me when I told him I’d plated a lunch for him. DD got upset and is hiding upstairs until we go out. I have to cook lunch here and then take it all to DMs.

GalwayShawl · 25/12/2022 11:23

My mum’s funeral was on Monday

my dad is taunting me about her death

one of my sisters has been appalling dismissive and nasty

I am heartbroken

Fedupofdiets · 25/12/2022 11:24

I have had D&V all night, feel like shit and wretched anxiety is at a high. I have to go to work tomorrow too (nurse) and I know it will be shit.

If I were you OP I would have a drink, open your fave box of chocolates and sit and watch TV all day. Hope your day gets better x

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 25/12/2022 11:25

I was awake at 5am with agonising pain and then spent half an hour vomiting copiously.

Wasn’t pretty.

Still iffy, but I’ll get over it!

mrstnov13 · 25/12/2022 11:32

Hope your day gets better x

I feel so down and want to cry.

I've been trying to recapture the magic and remake the memories I had from my own Christmas as a child but it's just not happening. I guess I'm just missing my Mum and how special she made everything, how special she made me feel. That type of love is irreplaceable. We're off to see toxic MIL soon and I'm not looking forward to it. The kids are happy though and I'm grateful for my lovely DH making an effort this year.

Startuplife · 25/12/2022 11:39

It was supposed to be a lovely first Christmas in our new house. Lots of guests arriving later this afternoon so we could enjoy the morning together.
We agreed to do stockings for each other as we’ve spent a lot on the house recently. DP is usually very thoughtful but for some reason completely panicked about buying me gifts and got nothing. When I woke up he sent me a text with tickets he’d booked last night to something I’d never choose.
I’m hugely hurt and disappointed. It’s not even about having nothing to open, it’s his complete lack of ability to organise anything which is a common theme. I’ve spent months planning and organising Christmas and he couldn’t even be bothered to think about what to buy me. Last night he was practically bouncing off the walls with excitement for everything I’d organised for our guests and the whole time he knew he hadn’t bought me anything.
I’ve spent the morning crying and he’s diligently getting the house ready but it just all feels rubbish and is making me reevaluate our whole relationship to be honest.

evtheria · 25/12/2022 11:42

I wish I could send you all to a lovely restaurant for a long meal by a glowing fireplace.. I am so sorry the day is shit. Or people, rather.

Odiebay · 25/12/2022 11:49

Partner chose to go on a run knowing full well we would be late getting to my family. So disrespectful. Feel like christmas is ruined and I'm so mad at him.

DazzlePaintedBattlePants · 25/12/2022 11:53

DD woke me at 5:30, which would have been fine except I had only just gotten back to sleep after waking at 3am. I have been run ragged this month with work and Christmas stuff and I was focusing on just getting through to end of today and this was final straw.

DH is doing dying swan act as he’s had a cold for a few weeks (see run ragged above). He’s regularly taken himself off to bed and I have sucked it all up but this morning I have had enough. Hasn’t occurred to him that I have been working my tits off whilst feeling subpar too.

Its minor twattery compared to some on here though, and he bought me a nice present, so I’ll live.

Twocrabs20 · 25/12/2022 11:55

Today I feel totally emotional. Without really good friends - near enough for any comfort. Lonely. And so disappointed by the shitty family relationships I do have. I made a massive move - which has cost me so much in terms of career, finances, significant friendship support to be close to family and now I totally totally regret it. And thinking, what next? Is there a way in returning back? And if not back, how do I get away from my toxic family. Why the #uck was I so stupid and didn’t see it coming? How could I have been so rose tinted about it all. And where is a better life for my family unit?
I have no answers but questions that demand more serious thought in the coming week / year. God give me strength to get though this day

SouthwarkSwish · 25/12/2022 11:58

House full of Covid here. I'm very tearful and DH has been an arse because he's feeling unwell, resulting in a big row and upset kids. Merry fucking Christmas.

SafeMove · 25/12/2022 12:01

It's my first Christmas ever without my youngest two DC - they are with their father. Feel lost.

Picked DS1 up from his gf's and he is so hungover he is vomiting so we haven't even got round to opening gifts. My endo has flared up and blood is pouring out of me even with transexamic acid.

Not seeing my family as my sister sucessfully managed to 'get rid of us' (her words) from their celebrations.

DP however is saving the day, doing all the cooking and letting me rest and keeping me in tea and hugs. I am grateful for him and 6 months today he will become my husband so that's amazing.

Grapewrath · 25/12/2022 12:01

Having an awful day here.
I’ve done all of the donkey work for Xmas and my partner is grumpy and nit picking at everything I say or do. Kids are older but trying to put a brave face on for my youngest.
At the minute I’m debating cancelling Christmas dinner and taking my youngest out tomorrow for lunch to make up for it.
On the upside, I feel like I’ve reached a turning point. I’m not sure what that is but I’m feeling a shift

Frenchyq25 · 25/12/2022 12:03

Dd23 has gone back to bed in a huff as our dog are her smoked salmon bagel (there was more,so could have made another one), so we're just sat here stagnating as if we dared open any presents she would scream blue murder at us....happy Christmas!

GloomyDarkness · 25/12/2022 12:04

DH got pj for me - phoned checked size and then bought 4 sizes smaller which has left me very paranoid about my weight ( I am overweight know this and was planning to get serious with in New Year after my birthday) and feeling I'll have to be really careful what I consume - which is great when surrounded by lots of food and drink.

Asked him why - he acted confused then told me he'd get right size - he literally phoned up and checked with me before buying - so likely will be my birthday present - so I can be upset again. I said - nicely it's fine and don't bother and now I'm being silly Hmm.

Everything else is great - teens are happy - - but this touched a nerve and I've been upset and hurt and now have a headache from quick cry in shower.

I know I'm being over sensitive but it's taken shine of the day for me.

RenoDakota · 25/12/2022 12:07

GalwayShawl · 25/12/2022 11:23

My mum’s funeral was on Monday

my dad is taunting me about her death

one of my sisters has been appalling dismissive and nasty

I am heartbroken

Sending love to you GalwayShawl Flowers

cherrypopsicle · 25/12/2022 12:07

My dad died suddenly last Sunday, only 66 and completely unexpected

Doing our best to have a nice Xmas for the kids. I'm exhausted

ReformedWaywardTeen · 25/12/2022 12:09

GalwayShawl · 25/12/2022 11:23

My mum’s funeral was on Monday

my dad is taunting me about her death

one of my sisters has been appalling dismissive and nasty

I am heartbroken

I'm so sorry for your loss Flowers

OP posts:
OldTinHat · 25/12/2022 12:12

I'm on own today and was due to travel to stay with family tomorrow.

I've been ill for days, now to ill to travel so all the plans made for this week have to be cancelled.

My parents are apparently also ill and were due to have lunch with DSis and her family but have had to cancel. They're in tears, my DSis is in tears and so am I.

LesLavandes · 25/12/2022 12:12

Home alone - divorced. 2 young adult children who prefer Christmas at their father's.

No word from them so far

AnSionnachGlic · 25/12/2022 12:12

My mother died last month so there's a big hole at our Christmas table. On top of that, came down with that horrible chest infection, chills, cough, body aches etc and am now laid up in bed feeling rotten. All my kids are home ( some in their 20s) so have a house full but thankfully all are mucking in, with dh , to get dinner on the table. I'm so weak I don't know if I'll even be able to sit at the table and have no appetite 😕.

LunaBlueSkies · 25/12/2022 12:16

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Alwaysworryingoversomething · 25/12/2022 12:17

cherrypopsicle · 25/12/2022 12:07

My dad died suddenly last Sunday, only 66 and completely unexpected

Doing our best to have a nice Xmas for the kids. I'm exhausted

That's awful @cherrypopsicle so sorry.

VioletLemon · 25/12/2022 12:18

Aw no, sorry. Go easy on yourself today and try to do a couple of things you like, doesn't matter if this year is different just engage in the stuff you can handle. Take care 💐

CheeseyOnionPie · 25/12/2022 12:18

Sorry this happened OP, I don’t think you’re being over sensitive at all. If he asked what size to get then he should have got the size you said. 4 sizes smaller is a joke, it’s not like one size smaller which might not matter on PJs. I would be upset too.

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