For those having a crap Christmas- come here and rant

[ReformedWaywardTeen]

Just that really.

Mine are:
Yet again, no Christmas gift from DH. He's had weeks. Ive literally done everything else, every gift, every bit of food planning, been cooking since Friday for it. Not one fucking thing.

My house is damp and crappy, landlord is a wanker so no point asking him as he'd already made comments about our rent being way under the value for houses in the area. Despite the fact the only thing the tosser does each year is a gas check and we've lived here ten years. So I went to put something nice on today as I live in jeans and never go out really bar to the supermarket, to find my tights have rotted through due to damp. The back of the drawer they were in is disgusting but I didn't realise as it's not a drawer in regular use. So now, fuck all to wear.

I have anxiety about my looks anyway due to my toxic mum who used to call me the ugly sister to my younger half sister. I always think people wonder why DH is with me when I'm fat, ugly and useless, or so my brain tells me, so now when everyone else looks nice I feel like a joke.

DD very obviously didn't like their gifts. It's difficult to know what to get them as they're an older teen, and don't conform to typical teen fashion from PLT and the likes. They barely smiled at anything but have said it was all nice they just don't have to jump around about gifts as they're not a little kid anymore.

DS is unwell with a cold. He's really trying to get in the spirit but can tell he'd rather be in bed bless him.

So yes, if you're having a shit time and can't say anything to your nearest and dearest, say it here.

Well done, well done ,well done. So brave, so fabulous, so brilliant. You are awesome

*@Mybloodycat
*
I hear you. It's crap isn't it? I have ran myself ragged for my 2 dds and they fight over who will empty the dishwasher after I work long hard days and they're at home slobbing

and hugs to all those that need it.

Life is really tough x

First Christmas in 5 years without my kids, they’re with their dad this year and he won’t let me have our court ordered phone call.

Slept half the day away, mostly drank my feelings in wine, had a small cry and eaten some suspicious looking cheese which has given me a stomach ache.

Roll on tomorrow when they’re home.

@Vulnerable4life sending you so much love - you’ve had a tough life by the sounds of it and I’m so sorry for al the crap you’ve had to endure x

Ended up at the emergency vets this evening with the dog, in horrible pain with an anal gland abscess...she had shown no signs and has never had any problems before. £££££ later and a very miserable dog who I now have to get pills into several times a day.

I am so sorry for everyone who is having a crap Christmas and especially those who have lost loved ones. Single mum to three here (DD 18, DS16, DS12), I support us financially my own as my ex is a man child. It’s tight. Told kids weeks ago that Xmas would be simple - my budget was £50 per child - they could have money or a gift. I panicked last minute and bought the boys label clothing so budget for all three ended up closer to £100 each. Both boys had major meltdown Xmas eve saying I hadn’t made enough effort (eg spent enough money), their dad (my ex) is way more generous (they didn’t know about the extra clothes gift). Then my 16 yo went out and bought alcohol illegally (false ID), got really drunk, kept me up to 1.00 am drunkenly saying how unhappy he is with his relationship with his dad. Absolutely shattered here - run my own business and had hoped a simple Xmas would be ok. On the plus side DD was an amazing help and very appreciative and DP was v supportive. Things were better today but last night I felt v v upset and unappreciated. This thread is awesome 😊.

MIL called me DH’s ex’s name 10 minutes in, on purpose, and they have brought her up 4 times, upsetting me and DSC in the process. Whoop.

On top of everything else in my previous posts, I'm also annoyed because my husband purchased an addition very hard to find and very expensive lego set for my son and gave it to him but said it was from his mum. He gave my son a boot bag and a puzzle from my parents. My son always remembers who gives him things for Xmas so now it looks really unfair that one grand parent has given him a gift worth £250 and the other set has given him something worth £40. Both sets of grandparents live quite far away and send roughly the same amount of money which we put in a savings account so we normally just put a tag on one of the gifts and say it's from them.

The whole car ride home my lovely boy kept saying how he felt so bad I've done so much hard work and I didn't really get anything, and how he'd asked Santa to bring me a new mixing bowl to replace the one I accidentally broke. So now he wants to buy me a new bowl with his pocket money. Husband kept getting annoyed at him every time he brought up how bad he felt for me 😕

Hugs all of you so very sad Christmas’s here. Go away about the war there are people in this country suffering.

Single mum here, had a lovely day but the kids are with their dad tonight and I'm so sleep deprived I'm in tears. I can't go to bed yet because if I do I'll wake up at 3am and not be able to get back to sleep. Sorry I know this isn't really that bad but wanted to rant somewhere where I wouldn't be told that I'm "finding things to complain about"

that my friend told me, I meant to add

Concentrate on the fact he's usually very thoughtful. Crying over the lack of gifts seems OTT.

My DS lost his best friend to suicide earlier this year and so he's felt understandably sad...

I also realised with painful crystal clear clarity today that my H of 23 years does not even like me. Not one little bit. I am just a biological machine to him and if said machine doesn't meet his expectations, he'll look at me with about as much empathy as a rhinoceros. It's been a long day...
💐 for anyone grieving for whatever reason today.

My rant seems so insignificant but I'm ill, DH is just getting over being ill, autistic DC is overwhelmed after a full-on week at school followed by going directly into Christmas (didn't break up until 23rd whereas usually we have a few days between school and Christmas to decompress him), I have an exam in January and I'm behind with studying due to pulling double parenting duty this week because of DH being ill, going to fall further behind now I have it, other DC has had a reaction to their (long term) antibiotics and has the runs, other-other DC having friendship troubles so has been quiet and sad.

We've had a nice enough day, just a lot of stress so have kept it deliberately lowkey. We didn't host anyone, had a quiet time of it, it's been okay.

Then at teatime the in-laws announced they're coming tomorrow as they usually come for dinner on Boxing Day. That's fine, DH told them, but we're not cooking anything as we told them several weeks ago and as we repeated this last week with being ill. No hosting this year, visit but don't expect to be fed.

"Well if you're not cooking we'll bring the food and we'll just cook it at yours".

DH told them no, that still means us hosting, we'll feel like we have to pitch in with cooking and cleaning after. No. He repeated they're welcome to visit but not for a full day and there will be no dinner.

"It'll be fine, we'll bring food, don't worry about it".

Repeated again, visit, no food.

After a lot of back and forth they've now managed to invite themselves for a roast dinner buffet tomorrow. They're going to get here for 1030 so there's plenty time to help me in the kitchen and play with the DC <stressy eye twitch>

How in the fuck has this happened when DH repeatedly said no, repeatedly said there would be no food, and twice said that we could just cancel altogether and do it another time instead if they weren't going to listen!?

DH has said he's not letting them in but that'll uset the DC. Conversely letting them in will also upset the DC because they constantly put their foot in it with them (asking gay DC if they have a girlfriend, making jokes with autistic DC even though he doesn't understand the concept of jokes so takes it seriously, expressing some majorly outdated views that they know DH and I will challenge which I'm sure is why they do it). DH is an only child so we can't even foist them off onto other family.

So I guess I cooking beef tomorrow unless someone wants to ring me and pretend to have an emergency so I can ditch it all.

I'm sending lots of love to all who are in a bad place.

Four years ago, I was reeling after my now XH (I was with him then) ruined yet another family Xmas time due to alcohol/drugs and going AWOL. He then broke into the house and was abusive. Police were called. That was the one of the final nails in the coffin for me. We split soon after. Long story, I won't get into it all now.

I'm very lucky that holidays/events/Christmas time is a lot more peaceful now, but I remember the utter misery and despair that I felt when things weren't great, and I hope that all who have that sadness and despair soon find some peace and happiness. xxx

Sorry to hear of so many having a hard day. Tales of DHs being crap and ruining the day certainly takes me back to my marriage, I wouldn’t change having left him but I would love to change sharing my children with a narc.

Children were returned late today and eldest was not given her money that ex promised towards the expensive present I bought her, he decided to spend it on “other” things.

Day has been sad in many ways.

Still not one of them has made me my cup of tea either!!

Thank god for this thread!

Very trivial compared to some, but I became sick with yet another big from my 1 year old DS. He started nursery three months ago and I have never had so many successive illnesses in my life.

Since October, I have had about 4 norovirus stomach type bugs and a similar number of cold/flu bugs. I had just got over an awful, aching, shivering cold thing that I came down with last weekend, to realise today that, as the day went on, I had aches, chills and my voice was completely hoarse.

DH and I were hosting, and it was insanely stressful as so much didn't get done in preparation last weekend due to me, DH and DS all getting the previous awful cold thing the previous weekend.

Today I excused myself from our extremely late 6/7pm ish Xmas dinner as soon as DS was in bed because I felt so rough.

To top that off, a toy that I was really looking forward to seeing DS use on Xmas day turned out to be damaged and will need to be replaced. While I know it doesn't really matter, as he is too young to understand Xmas, seeing him play with that toy would have made the otherwise extremely shitty Xmas day have a tiny enjoyable aspect.

I have decided that there is no way in hell that I am hosting next year.

Both me and DH work full time, and having to host Xmas has been too much stress alongside dealing with the never ending stream of nursery sodding illnesses. Relatives don't really look after DS (too long since they did it last, not confident etc).

Consequently, DH and I were having to constantly stop what we were doing in the kitchen to deal with a nappy change or a tantrum, which was the absolute pits, and part of the reason the dinner (which I was too sick to eat by that point) was so late.

I hesitate to call my day crap but its not what I expected. Dc2 (5 months) has been crying almost all day except when nursing. I think he's just been tired because he fell asleep on me at 11 but woke when I moved and it was game over from then on. DC1 is 6, DH has been kept her entertained today thank goodness but I've spent most of the day trying to calm DC2 upstairs so as not to disturb DH & DC1 downstairs. Plus the house is small (& mouldy) so not really enough room for DC2 and me anyway downstairs when they are playing. It's not been festive at all. I feel guilty getting so frustrated at the crying because I wanted him SO much, took us nearly 4 years to get him we're unbelievably lucky to have DC at all but it's been a bit wearing today and not feeling at all festive. Hopefully DC1 had a good day. Was hoping to spend some time with DH but he's fallen asleep exhausted, I don't blame him it's felt like a long day. Hope 2023 is an improvement for all and sympathy for those who have lost loved ones.

@Handsfullofholes you need to embrace the cough/c₩nt response to these comments. If anyone questions it behave totally innocently

Not sure I can complain as it’s not an awful Christmas but extremely boring. DH and I (no kids yet) stayed with his family this year, we live abroad and due to our jobs this is our first Xmas back ‘home’ in 12 years. I didn’t expect a parade but I thought his family would have gotten together and made more of an effort. Since we arrived on Thursday, everyone seems to just do their own individual family thing because their just so so busy, we are expected to visit their homes and in each house these busy people are all just sitting around staring blindly at the tv while their children sit on iPads the whole time. Nobody is talking, they all seem bored and uninterested in us and the world in general. We used to think we were missing out all those Christmases we’ve had abroad but actually we had a really great time hosting for our friends or vice versa. Will not be staying with them again, if we do come back for xmas then we’ll stay in a hotel.

ps: my family are not much better, decided to visit my family today and they were also staring blindly at the tv with the odd casual racist comment from certain family members. Give me strength. Two more days and we will happily fly home.

🙋‍♀️I’ve had the shittest Christmas, the perfect end to the shittest year of my life. Now In bed with flu like symptoms knowing I have to go to work tomorrow.

A few years ago we decided we would never have a stressful Xmas again
So it's been the 3 of us in pjs all day opening presents watching TV went a walk and cooked food.
If anyone ever comes round it will be a chilled day.
Sending love to all this who need it

Had a lovely day with my family and DC (9m and almost 2). We had 11 round for Xmas dinner. partner has decided to go mental and drink himself into oblivion, has been sick in our en suite and blocked the sink... Is blaming me (weird...) And he has to look after both kids first thing in the morning.

I warned him that he was drinking too much but did he stop...no. so I'm not going to feel bad. I'm going to have to sleep in a stinking room overnight, have sent him to the sofa. And I'm going to take a back seat on parenting tomorrow.

I have both kids literally 247 as he's always working, so I'm going to go for a long walk with the dogs and let him deal with the consequences of his actions. Whilst being absolutely fuming inside.

On the surface a lovely day, kind thoughtful funny presents from dh and kids. Dds super bf is here and is the perfect guest. I’ve done every fuckingthing. Superficial offers of help that never materialised.Dh swept in to help serve at last minute. I’ve missed out on the nice bits of the day. Ds2 managed to get to 8.30 before his annual Christmas strop. Ds1(who is in prison) said he’d call and hasn’t.