Christmas dinner at midday 😱

[PleaseTakeItOff]

This is bonkers, isn’t it?

Having dinner at DM’s tomorrow and dbro, SIL and their 2 dc will also be there (they’re staying at DM’s, we’re local). Popped round today and asked what time they want us there tomorrow so I can finish assembling trifle and set table etc. DM says 2/3, SIL looks aghast and says that it needs to be on the table at 12 as their dc (2yo and 4yo) always have lunch then. DM and I suggest they have a sandwich lunch and we do Christmas dinner at their tea time instead so 4/5ish but SIL thinks that’s ridiculous.

This now means we’ll have to get up even earlier for dc to have time to open and play with their presents for a few hours before walking over to DM’s at 10.30. It means DM is stressed about having to get up even earlier to start dinner rather than being able to enjoy a leisurely breakfast, morning of present opening. Dbro thinks we should do what SIL wants and as it’s her first Christmas she’s spent with our side of the family rather than hers then of course we all want to try and accommodate her. I’ve never really done Christmas with people other than my own family and now I’m wondering if it’s odd not to have Christmas dinner at midday.

I have many memories of hanging around the kitchen late afternoon as a child, staring at the food because I was so hungry. This occurred on Sundays as well as Christmas, so a regular occurrence. Therefore meals at normal times for us, and Christmas lunch at 1pm. I don’t want to snack, I want to eat the main event, with time spare later for turkey sandwiches!

In that case, she will have had her Christmas meal in Christmas Eve anyway! I like to have it early (around 1) because I cannot physically manage a heavy meal in the evening and it gives me the chance to squeeze in a workout.

Everyone I know, and I mean everyone, has Christmas dinner, not christmas lunch. 4PM is probably the earliest anyone has it but it is usually nearer between 5 and 7.

We have ours at 2/2.30

It is mad not to have discussed it before now, or for a guest to think they can direct the timings.

It's not actually mad to do dinner at 12 - I have managed this lots of times when I've had to leave for work at 1.

We're doing ours for when the kids get up from their nap around 3. We always have bacon sandwiches for breakfast on Christmas morning so will give them a snack instead of lunch to keep them going through nap time and then a small picky tea in the evening

Everyone I know, and I mean everyone, has Christmas dinner, not christmas lunch. 4PM is probably the earliest anyone has it but it is usually nearer between 5 and 7.

I live in the North East and here dinner is your midday meal, so Christmas dinner and Christmas lunch is the same thing really. We usually have ours around 2-3ish.

Have never considered asking our entire family to have it earlier to accommodate my child mind, if she’s hungry she can have a sandwich!

Oh, that makes more sense. So she's from another country, hasn't visited for Xmas before and no-one had run through what happens, just expected her to know - which given the amount of consternation on this thread, there's no consensus on anyway.

I think other European countries may do gifts on Xmas eve also so it may not have occurred to her that the unwrapping/ playing with gifts on Xmas morning was a thing either.

Anyway, OP, I hope it all works out.

So what exactly do you do? Prep food, cook. There’s only so much you can do really. 90% can be done the day before. People stress out too much. It’s a bit of food at the end of the day. If it stress Ed you out, it’s not worth it!

"People stress out too much. It’s a bit of food at the end of the day. If it stress Ed you out, it’s not worth it!"

Exactly right. Sandwiches at 12 and Christmas dinner at whatever time suits the cook.

Yes she's being very cheeky.

That's only an hour and a half later than midday lol

Mumsnet is bonkers sometimes

As someone who has similar aged kids we’d never last without food until 3/4pm for Christmas lunch! Young kids get up (and therefore also parents) at 6/7am so yes they are ready for lunch by around 12…
I think the compromise is either a sandwich lunch at 12 for them, then Christmas dinner at 4pm, or do Christmas lunch around 1pm with snacks earlier for kids. We’re doing 1pm this year, though we are hosting.

We tend to have ours around 1.30pm. But I'd never presume to dictate when food is served in someone else's home. IMO if you are a guest in someone else's home you fall in line with what they're doing.

Wow she is a CF. When you are a guest you don’t dictate meal times

I would struggle to eat Christmas Dinner that early. Far too big a meal to eat at that time of day. Earliest we have ever had ours is 4pm and that’s a perfect time.

However if I was a guest and someone’s timings were different to what I was used to then I would just go along with it because I am the guest

Do people have snacks if they are having Christmas dinner at 4?

I have breakfast and then maybe some nibbles .

When we’ve eaten around that time we’ve generally had a cooked breakfast and been picking at all the chocolate and other treats that got opened for presents.

Totally fine. Then you aren't going to bed ridiculously full. We are 1230ish tomorrow. Otherwise the kids need lunch and whinge all day.

Dinner is around 4:30 / 5 here.

Couldn’t eat such a huge meal at lunch. 🤢

Breakfast at 9am (and available as a ‘help yourself’ if kids are younger and need early sustenance).

Free access to breakfast till around 10.30am

Canapes and fizz from midday - and they keep coming till around 1.30

Formal starter at table at around 2.00pm. Time for a bit of a breather.

Full meal served at 3.30/4.00pm, at table till around 6pm but people can come and go once we’ve eaten / ahead of pudding (which may well be served in the evening, along with the cheese board)

This is my ideal, kids can snack, be fed as and when.

On a day off, getting up 90 mins earlier to make lunch matters, eating 90mins later than you want to matters. Can you really not see how it impacts on both sides?

Nope. We’ll be aiming for 12-12.30.

Ours is when everything is ready, anywhere between 1 & 3pm. If the DGCs are here then we have scrambled eggs and smoked salmon on toast at breakfast time and Christmas dinner at 1. It’s only the two of us this year so we’ll have a long dog walk in the morning, and we’ll eat when the porchetta is ready!

We eat at 12.30. Kids up at 6 ready for lunch by then. Don't like having it for tea.

It really doesn't matter what I do - you aren't interested in my menu are you? We just go a bit further than a shove and a steam - if that's all you want to do and that makes you and your guests happy go for it - for us we like to make it a bit more special - and that's worth it to us.