AIBU to think I'm unemployable? Or am I just difficult?

[anerki101]

I have one child in their first year of primary school. DS enjoys school but it's a struggle to get him there. I have posted previously about his various issues. We suspect he may have autism and the school have been observing him. They are going to set up a meeting with me after the Christmas holidays.

I have long suspected that I'm also neurodiverse and DS is almost exactly as I was at that age. I also take medication for generalised anxiety and health anxiety.

I have a DH who works 8am until 5:30pm five days a week and 1 in 3 Saturdays too.

I do the school runs. 840am drop off and 3pm pick up.

I have no family help for school runs or school holidays. The school has a breakfast club but no after school club.

So essentially my work options are 930 - 2pm roughly depending on distance from school, term time only.

I'm well aware plenty of parents work around primary aged DC but for the life of me, I cannot see a way to make it work.

The first job I considered was TA. But all the jobs I've looked at, even they finish at 3:30 but I have to pick DS up at 3. No afterschool Club and I cannot afford to pay for childcare.

I can't afford to okay for holidays clubs in the school holidays and with DS various needs, I really don't think it would be a good idea anyway.

So what am I supposed to do? We desperately need another income. I'm currently at uni and contribute my student maintenance loan to the household Pot but its not enough. My degree also isn't one that will lead directly to a career. I'd be a graduate so there would be more job options but not a direct career path. And those more job options are likely to be unworkable due to DS anyway.

Am I being deliberately difficult here or are there really no answers?

I will add I did have an evening job but DS really struggled with not seeing me all day whilst at school and then not seeing me at all in the evenings.

Sorry for the length.

DH wont help with school runs or anything because he says it's not worth it financially for him to lose pay because my wage will always be so much less as to mean if he helped out we'd be at a loss financially.

What time does DS go to bed? Supermarket/pub shifts that start after he's asleep might work as an interim.
Lunchtime supervisor bit obviously wouldn't be a huge amount of income.

What are your skills? The workplace has never been more flexible, loads of roles are remote and offer a variety of different hours. If you really need the extra money then you’ll have to be open minded and proactive and look for solutions. What were your previous jobs?

Yeah lunchtime supervisor wouldn't be any where near enough. DS goes to bed about 8ish which doesn't give an awful lot of time in the evening to work if I need to be up at 7 to get him to school.

Pub work in the evenings and weekends seems the best bet. Do you have any skills that you could use to freelance from home? E.g. virtual assistant etc?

Are you a reasonably fast and accurate typist? What about audio typing work that could be done at home whilst your son is at school?

Have you any when experience before your degree? Is your degree one that could lead to tutoring or research assistant type opportunity? Other areas (depending on degree/experience) that are flexible are proof reading, coding, bookeeping).

What skills do you have?

Are there jobs in his or another school / universities? Education usually has some of the most flexibility in terms of term only contracts.

Why can't your husband sort dinner / put him to bed etc. You could then work 6 til 11. Or use breakfast club and work 8 til 2.

And I don't understand why his salary can't pay for childcare. What would he do if he were single?

I worked customer service when I left school. Then cleaning jobs. Customer service was hard with the anxiety but I did get through it. Honestly I've spent hours scrolling the job sites. Searched within a 15 mile radius of home. Most are care jobs, shift work jobs demanding employee flexibility, shifts between 8 and 8, etc. 8 - 530 admin jobs. I'm trying to think of solutions but nothing seems fo be working.

Why can't your DH put DS to bed? then you're available to work in the evening from 6:30 ish.

Pub/cafe/restaurant work. 10 til 2 shifts. I've employed a few mums on this shift as weekend/evening workers were normally students who couldn't do days due to Uni.

Work from home jobs. Competition is stiff, but they are out there. Especially customer service roles, couple of the energy suppliers are looking for people, shifts vary 8am to 10pm at night including weekends on rotation. Fully remote.

When my children were little I used to work nights and then sleep while they were at school. It saved us a fortune in child care. I started work after they'd gone to bed in the evening and I'd be home in time to do the school run in the morning.

If the school has a breakfast club then you could start earlier than 9.30am.

Childcare for a couple of hours after school wouldn't cost more than a days wage so you could get a full time or nearly full time job and afford a childminder who can collect from school. You'd only need them for an hour if you're looking at TA jobs that finish at 3.30pm. That would still leave the majority of your wage to add the extra income that you say is needed. If the childminder is Ofsted registered, which they should be then the Government tax free childcare scheme would also reduce your costs by 20%.

His salary barely covers are current outgoings. Hence the need for me to try and find something

Dog walking, child minding, cleaning, tutoring.

I don't understand why if you're both working you wouldn't be able to afford childcare.

Self employed cleaner?

Catering assistant in a school

Part time night work in a warehouse pays good money and worked well for us

Nows the time to get a job. I'm desperately trying to recruit admin staff for a 6 month project. It's so hard to recruit at the moment that we literally take any hours people can offer us. I'd recommend applying for part time work but including a cover letter stating the days and hours you can offer, say you appreciate it's a bit limited but would be grateful if they would consider you...I think you'll find companies are so short staffed that if you're appointable they'll take you on what ever you can offer.

Because our outgoings are high and my earning potential is extremely low?

Part-time jobs for those hours are hard to find, but not impossible; but you will have to keep looking for quite a while until you’re lucky enough to find something suitable.

School catering might be an option, kitchen staff in our school usually finish about 2:30pm.

Cafes / pubs / garden centres with a busy lunch trade might also suit the hours.

This is an option but I'd quite like something that offers a stable monthly wage really.

You need nights.
Leave when little one is in bed.
Do the school run and then sleep

School catering yes but cafes and pubs over lunch times wouldn't work because of the school holidays