I’m stressed about Christmas Day.
My 20 month old little boy stayed with my parents on Saturday for the night and was an absolute nightmare, he has learned to climb out his travel cot as he’s very tall for his age and only slept for 3 hours. He’s always struggled with new environments and routine changes, and never has been a good sleeper (we’re currently waiting for an autism assessment due to a number of factors with his development)
I felt so guilty on Sunday knowing he kept my mum up all night and that he couldn’t sleep, he was so tired when we picked him up he went to sleep at 9AM and slept until 12:30PM. I went back to work when he was very young at 5 months due to a fantastic opportunity but made the decision to return to being a SAHM in September due to the ongoing autism speculation and just wanting to spend more time with him. I made the decision on Sunday that I don’t want to change his routine or stay out overnight anymore because of this.
our plans were to go to the in-laws on Christmas Day and stay overnight but due to him being able to climb out the travel cot and far too young and excitable to sleep in the bed, I want to change our plans to just an afternoon visit (maybe for dinner?) between his afternoon nap and bedtime so as not to cause any more disruptions to his routine.
Aibu? I feel like my in-laws will be disappointed and my partner will likely sulk, but my main excitement for Christmas is to see my little boy happy and excited and I just think that overtiredness and overstimulation could ruin that for him. Also on a selfish level it would be me that would have to battle with him for hours to nap and sleep at bedtime whilst everyone else drinks!
AIBU?
AIBU to cancel Christmas at MIL to keep toddler routine
HallieM93 · 07/12/2022 23:43
Am I being unreasonable?
2319 votes. Final results.
POLLBeamur · 08/12/2022 00:00
How near to you do they live?
I remember visiting my in-laws with our toddler and seething whilst wrangling an overtired and grumpy child while DH enjoyed a nice relaxing meal with wine with his parents.
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waterrat · 08/12/2022 00:07
Hi. I have an autistic child and I completely understand you op. If people dont they are not properly understanding your situation
I have learnt to to say no to situations that will overwhelm my child. That is sometimes diffocult for other people to understand.
Speak to your in laws and explain that it will be miserable for you and your child if they are overwhelmed by the day and you are following his needs.
As the parent of a neurodiverse child you have a lifetimr ahead of people not understanding your childs needs so dont ever feel embarassed about putting them first
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