AIBU to be upset that friend told me I couldn’t get pregnant before her wedding?

[LilyPad11]

My best friend is getting married next December and has asked me and another of our childhood friends to be bridesmaids.

To provide a bit of context I had a really traumatic late miscarriage in august which DF knew about, and I was always open about wanting to TTC again once me and my husband were ready. Fast forward to now and DF asked me to be bridesmaid last week which I was so happy about. I was talking to her today about being worried we would not conceive again or suffer another MC and her only reply was ‘you are not allowed to get pregnant before the wedding, I will be really angry with you’

The wedding is still a year away and I really don’t want to put our TTC plans on hold for that long but I feel like now if I do get pregnant it will be overshadowed by the feeling of disappointing my DF. I really don’t want any bad feelings around this potential pregnancy as I will be so lucky just to carry a healthy baby and I don’t want anything to get in the way of that happiness.

Sorry for the essay but basically AIBU to feel really upset about this situation?

Oh my god!
Bridezilla alert. That's so ridiculous I don't know where to begin.

What did you say??

OP, you are clearly not being unreasonable, your conception plans are absolutely nothing to do with your friend. Good luck with your pregnancy journey.

I'd be telling her to fuck right off!

WTF.

Tell her to fuck off!! No way can she demand that of you OP . She is not a friend. How fucking ridiculous.

Yep. Tell her she's an immature loon. Her hen do will be a nightmare. She will be a horrible bridezilla. She has no consideration for you. Walk away. Selfish cow.

Of course YANBU. That’s crazy.

What did you say to her?!

She’s not a friend.

Tell her to piss off.

Shes an idiot. Ignore her. You TCC has absolutely nothing to do with her. So sorry to hear of your miscarriage.

Your friend is an arrant cow and do NOT put TTC on hold because of her. X

Sorry for your loss

Your friend is being absolutely ridiculous, her life isnt more important than yours

Back out now she’s a nut job and is going to demand you buy an expensive dress, go in several hens (1 abroad obviously) and stay two nights before, and the night after at a wedding venue in the middle of nowhere

She’s not your friend.

I’m guessing your friend was probably joking??!! Not that it was a kind / appropriate joke, but I’m sure she couldn’t have meant it seriously. Otherwise she’s the most self absorbed, ridiculous human on the planet. Don’t give it another thought in terms of your feelings around ttc.

So sorry for your previous loss. Sending you baby dust ❤️

I'd also add if a friend gets "disappointed" because you fall pregnant she's NOT a friend. She's just someone who considers you an accessory.

You are absolutely not unreasonable. Unfortunately she is not the friend you thought she was. If it were me I’d be pulling out of being a bridesmaid now. Don’t let her get in the way of your TTC.

I hope she was joking! If she wasn’t it’s taking bridezillaness to the next level. Don’t put your plans on hold. I’m sorry for your loss and wish you lots of luck.

You have every right to be upset and your ‘dear’ friend has no right to tell you to lay off TTC until next December! Bollocks to that, if you get pregnant in, say, July, what is she going to do? What if you get pregnant in February? The baby would be out by December. Carry on TTC @LilyPad11 - she’ll probably end up a bridezilla anyway so it’ll save you a year of earache.

I’d be texting her now that her request was unreasonable, has upset you and you want to step back from being her bridesmaid.

And then ignore and carry on TTC as before.

I’m so sorry for your loss.

Dont put your plans on hold. You shouldn’t be constrained by this: there are enough other factors to bear in mind when TTC without also considering someone else’s presumably aesthetic concerns.

I would crack on, OP. Maybe tell her that you’re going to do so and you don’t think her request is reasonable, but honestly I’d just carry on TTC and pay her no mind.

She is fucking mental.( sorry if this terminology upsets anyone..i have mh issues,)

You would forget not bring her bridesmaid much quicker than never having a child. Start trying when you want and if you’re pregnant offer to step aside, if she says yes get her out of your life.

She’s a dick and you must know that.

This in spades.
Who is she to tell you. She doesn't dictate a thing.

Also, who on earth is voting YABU? So many nutjobs out there.