To think this amount of 'me time' is a bit excessive...?

[Aprilshowers123]

Hello! First timer... Could do with some thoughts as I'm at a bit of a crossroads and not sure which way to turn. It's leave (YANBU) or stay (YABU).

Been with DP for 6 years, lived together for 2.5 years, my DC is 15 (DP is not his dad, DC's dad is not involved). This is an average week with my DP:

Workaholic - finishes at 5pm but doesn't get home until 8pm or later, goes to the gym for at least an hour everyday after he finishes, talks about work a lot and will spend probably another hour or two working on the laptop

Hobby - 1-2 nights a week during the week, goes straight after work, gets home after 11pm, I'm usually asleep by then. Every Saturday all day usually gets home about 8pm, and every Sunday morning.

Family - all day Sunday (goes straight from hobby) until the evening, usually 7ish, visiting his DM and DSis (disabled)

Socialises and likes to binge drink, sometimes every weekend, but always at least once a month.

We are supposed to be getting married next year and he desperately wants me to have a baby (at least one)... AIBU to think his 'me time' is excessive and I'd be ridiculous to think he'd change...?

I've talked to him about it before and asked him to make more of an effort to compromise and be around a bit more especially as he wants a baby, he says sorry, he's selfish, he'll make more of an effort blah blah blah then nothing changes...

Definitely not OW situation..

I love him, he loves me, but I'm not happy...

He doesn't prioritise you at all, does he? You and your dc are the very bottom of his list.

You deserve better.

I'd leave.

And for God's sake don't have a baby with him.

Oh wow. Just read your update.

I hope you're really happy in your new place!

Well done OP

Enjoy the fresh start!

Well done OP! All the best.

Gosh, what hobby was that consuming all his time?

WELL DONE!

@Aprilshowers123 Well that takes guts - these decisions in practice and emotionally must be very hard to make. I really hope that better things come your way - you deserve better. No doubt it's going to have it hard moments. All the best for the future.

So pleased for you, good luck with your new life.

Well done you. Glad you acknowledge you deserve better. I wish you well.

@Aprilshowers123

So glad you're out of that terrible situation.

Yes, it's scary at first, but just concentrate on the peace and calm of your new place. How wonderful to not have to deal with him anymore!!!

Well done. Even though it's the right decision it will feel tough to move on without him. You invested time and energy and had good times but this man wants you to slot into his life. He isn't prepared to make changes for you and you deserve better.

I am sure he will regret losing you but he has to be realistic his life isn't compatible with having a successful relationship. Is your son OK with the change?

He wants a baby for the same reasons he wants you. He just wants someone there for when he gets home doing all his stuff he wants. Noway would I do this . Wouldn't marry him, or have kids with him. He doesn't even spend time with you.

Well done @Aprilshowers123 , you've made a great decision for you and your DC. It all feels a bit scary and unfamiliar now but in a few weeks you'll be SO pleased you got out.

Well done, OP. You deserve someone who views and treats you as an equal, not a meal ticket and a maid.