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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Friend dismissive about holiday

214 replies

Gezunteit1 · 12/10/2022 12:01

My partner and I are going on what is a holiday in a lifetime for us, never flown long-haul before and we've saved a lot for this.
I told a friend we were going (her and her husband are on high incomes)
And she just said, "That's nice but really not the sort of place I'd choose, it's somewhere I'd go to take a few pictures but that's it, it's far too fake and artificial (it's not Dubai) .
"Personally I prefer somewhere like X long haul expensive place"
That's good for her, and it doesn't have to be everyone's cup of tea but why the need to say that and try and put a dampener on it?
It's like if a family were going to Blackpool (I know its rep but I like it) i wouldn't go "Oh it's far too tacky and rough there, I prefer the Cotswolds myself"
I'd just keep my mouth shut and let them be happy about it.

OP posts:
SleepingStandingUp · 12/10/2022 12:14

takealettermsjones · 12/10/2022 12:13

I'm just here to find out where it is 👀

Come on OP. You could be anyone. 😃

Exactly. Admitting it's Benidorm is hardly going to have us all going "omg it's def Linda, she's going THERE"

FlounderingFruitcake · 12/10/2022 12:14

Now I’m thinking it’s Vegas or LA… but fair enough if you won’t tell!
I’d seriously ditch the ‘friend’ though.

HangOnToYourself · 12/10/2022 12:14

BitOutOfPractice · 12/10/2022 12:04

Some people just like to remind you that they are “better” than you all the time.

I have friend like this. Recently got a bit of money and now the expert on everything and everywhere. It’s nauseating.

This entirely, some people love to point out they are more knowledgeable and better travelled by spouting utter shite

Original poster
Gezunteit1 · 12/10/2022 12:15

She can be nice but I guess I don't see or speak to her much anymore. We're really different now and it's a shame that it's due to earnings

OP posts:
girlmom21 · 12/10/2022 12:16

takealettermsjones · 12/10/2022 12:13

I'm just here to find out where it is 👀

Come on OP. You could be anyone. 😃

If her friends read it it's going to be pretty obvious. OP is excited so will have discussed it with her social circle.

wifeofaclosefriend · 12/10/2022 12:16

She doesn't sound like much of a friend. I'd have to make her aware that you've had to save for it and it's a big deal for you and your H and tell her you feel that she's looking down in you and that you don't appreciate it!

SnoozyLucy7 · 12/10/2022 12:17

She’s a silly snob.

mc260 · 12/10/2022 12:18

I bet she's got two sheds! People like that don't want to see you do well and wants to just remind you that she knows more about them and goes on these type holidays all the time. She's basically just trying to one up you. I'd ignore her and have a wonderful holiday 😎

TooHotToTangoToo · 12/10/2022 12:19

Doesn't matter if it's west in super mare or the Maldives op, if she was a good friend she'd be happy that you're happy.

takealettermsjones · 12/10/2022 12:20

girlmom21 · 12/10/2022 12:16

If her friends read it it's going to be pretty obvious. OP is excited so will have discussed it with her social circle.

Show quote history

Obviously I don't mind whether she tells us or not, it's her choice 😃

But I've never understood this on MN. She's given details of the exact conversation that happened, that's far more unusual/outing than just the holiday destination, which probably hundreds even thousands of people will probably visit each year.

It's like when people give a blow by blow account of a very specific argument that happened in a public place while they were out exercising and then say they don't want to say the sport as too outing. 😆

girlmom21 · 12/10/2022 12:21

@takealettermsjones I can't argue with that Grin

OrangePumpkinLobelia · 12/10/2022 12:22

I reckon it's Tokyo. (And if it is enjoy to the max! I went there on a whim once and absolutely LOVED it.)

Ignore. Either she is slightly jealous and needs to examine herself as to why she can't just be pleased for you, or she likes pissing on your chips and needs to ask herself why she is such a bitch.

Either way her opinion is not one you need, and possibly you don't need her as a very close friend either.

Have a wonderful wonderful time!

ferneytorro · 12/10/2022 12:22

I think if one was quick enough the correct response to ""Personally I prefer somewhere like X long haul expensive place" would be a really confused face and a quizzical "sorry why is where you would prefer relevant, you aren't going".

slowquickstep · 12/10/2022 12:26

Have a great holiday, don't send her a postcard, in fact find new friends.

rookiemere · 12/10/2022 12:26

It's a very odd and rude response.

I love holidays and love hearing about other peoples. Even if it was something I'd find absolutely ghastly, I would never share my thoughts and still want to heat about it.

I'd be seeing a lot less of her, she seems very up herself and annoying.

NCAutumn · 12/10/2022 12:29

"I bet she's got two sheds!"

I've got 2 sheds Confused but I'm not a massive prick. Why is having two sheds a problem?

AMDB5 · 12/10/2022 12:32

I wouldn't be friends with somebody like that

greenhousegal · 12/10/2022 12:33

I have ONE shed. It was burgled at the weekend. They took nothing because there was nothing but crap in there.

Friend is a jelly baby.

fuckinghorgel · 12/10/2022 12:33

Las Vegas?

CrystalCoco · 12/10/2022 12:34

My Dad does something similar every.single.time I book somewhere that's not Europe - He says some shit along the lines of "Oh I've never really fancied X place" and screws up his nose
Good cos you're not fucking invited!
Some people can never just wind their neck in, be polite and say I hope you have a nice time - so I'll say it for you OP - "I hope you have a really nice time"!

psychomath · 12/10/2022 12:35

If OP says where it is the thread's going to turn into 500 people going "Bangkok is tacky though, I'd never go there" like anyone asked for their opinion.

CandyLeBonBon · 12/10/2022 12:35

@mc260 I've got two sheds but I'm not like that! That's pure shedism!

MRSE20 · 12/10/2022 12:35

Is she like this about other things too?
They sound like they do put theirselves on a pedestal and mock anything anyone else does
Sometimes it’s not jealousy, it’s just them being an bit because they get a thrill from pretending they’re better

enjoy your holiday and forget about silly opinions

LumpyandBumps · 12/10/2022 12:36

At least you won’t run the risk of bumping into her when you are there, which sounds like a bonus.
Also curious about the location. Is it so good they named it twice? 😀

CandyLeBonBon · 12/10/2022 12:36

I'm guess New York