To think you can learn a lot about someone from the way they speak to waiters & shop assistants

[chatterbug22]

Or anyone they perceive to be lower than themselves

Nothing repulses me more than hearing people patronise waiting staff and people who work in retail. Slow timing them, being ‘assertive’ with them, demanding the nominal service charge for the table to be removed for literally no reason than ‘they shouldn’t have put it on the bill without asking me’.

Just think all of it is gross. Even if your new jumper has a snag in it or your food was cold, the person you are speaking with is almost always not to blame and they are at the bottom of the ladder just trying to earn an honest living.

I’ve been told previously that this opinion means I am virtue signalling but I really admire those working for minimum wage as often it’s jobs that have little thanks in exchange for a lot of manual effort.

AIBU?

Calling someone obtuse/plain thick for disagreeing with you on something? That’s not too hard to judge as rude/aggressive, is it? I’d say it comes over really rude. Calling someone names, insulting their intelligence, and swearing because they politely disagreed with you isn’t like judging someone’s tone, it’s more judging their actual behaviour.

Nothing repulses me more than hearing people patronise waiting staff and people who work in retail. Slow timing them, being ‘assertive’ with them, demanding the nominal service charge for the table to be removed for literally no reason than ‘they shouldn’t have put it on the bill without asking me’.

I'll take your word for it she was being horrible and not just "assertive". (How would you have described a man doing this, btw?)
But she's not wrong, is she? 12.5% is a lot when the service has been slow. And the poor lad needs to learn that customers are horrible, and that he must learn to say "apologies, I'll get someone to attend to that for you" and then get his manager.

I usually request a service charge is taken off. I am not a fan of being told how much to tip. Although i'm married to a chef and we tip well, i just prefer to decide for myself how much. And i always ask how the tips are handled, if there is a chance the staff have to give any of it to the owner/manager, it is discreetly put in their hand. They are likely to get more if i know it is shared with the kitchen staff too.

We should treat everyone with dignity and respect.

Sometimes the waiters / workers are snotty and have attitude.
They aren’t always the victims.

Sometimes the waiters / workers are snotty and have attitude.
They aren’t always the victims
**
Indeed they are, but if you find it happens a lot then maybe it's a you problem and not them.
**

Eh, I've gotten myself into this so I'll finish it by saying this:

You butted heads and disagree. You feel she was rude to you. You now want to infer that because you feel she was rude to you this one time, she was rude to the shop assistant in her example. This is not reasonable. She could've been rude, of course, but equally she could not have been and you seem unable to even consider this for a second. Yes, customers are rude! It's hardly news! But equally shop assistants can also be rude and provide poor customer service. Also hardly news!

Your own behavior on this thread can be read as argumentative. Should I assume that you are argumentative in real life too? No of course I shoudn't.

Oh, no worries Flump, I said sometimes you see.

It was general comment directed at the posters reporting endless bad service, not specifically you.

Perhaps you shouldn’t have then copied my post….

Btw, isn't "slow timing" the practice of deliberately going really slowly to waste the time of the assistant/person in service position?

I don’t answer stupid questions

Clearly it’s you who has reading comprehension problems.

This was some time ago and at the time there was ONE picture on of ONE of the packs.

HTH.

Even if you are a minimum paid assistant with no power, you are the the only person the customer can interact with and you are the representative of the company at that point.

Exactly. I couldn’t process an exchange myself.

It's a toy FFS, not a mortgage, how many T&C's should there be?!?

LOL, indeed! I wouldn’t expect to go to enormous lengths for a simple purchase and I REALLY wouldn’t expect to be met with a sneery attitude for not going to those enormous lengths.

And even if I WAS in the wrong - it’s the staff’s job to process a refund/exchange (IIRC I had to buy the new set and wait for a refund on the old one). Just get the bloody toy and do your job! You’re not working in a Gulag FFS it’s hardly asking the Earth.

But as I’ve said numerous times that wasn’t the same looking page when I bought the toy.
I did contact Smyths to air my grievances about the staff member and also raise that the website is misleading. Never much cared to check back but I can’t have been the only one so obviously it worked!

Your last sentence is why I called you names - you’ve UTTERLY twisted my words and frankly when this happens name calling is deserved. And obviously people behave differently on forums than they do IRL - I can’t imagine you’re so very obtuse and condescending and ‘computer says no’ IRL, are you?

I’m not obtuse. I understand everything you’re saying, I just disagree with you. And yeah, I would disagree with you in real life too. And I’d do it without calling you names or becoming aggressive.

And my last sentence didn’t twist your words. Those were your words. I added the ‘that’s somehow relevant’ because I presume you stating that bizarre opinion meant you thought it was somehow relevant.

Well this thread might as well be renamed The Lydia and Kan roasting thread.

Also the sneering at asking staff to give feedback - I worked for independents and chain restaurants & shops as a student and part of our job was to feed back. I remember working for MKOne and a customer complaining that the plus size range was all too tall and that larger ladies are usually shorter not taller and she ‘hates that they assume we all look like a brick shit house’ (which made me smile). I said I completely with you, and I will feed that back. And I did. So a few years later to be met with ‘Ugh HAHAHAHAHA you I think I have the power to speak to someone else in this organisation Karen’ isn’t exactly what I expected.

I’d have thought it was another word for clock watching ie “It’s now been 23 minutes since we ordered our starter”

But good to know you think ‘name calling is deserved’ when someone disagrees with you. Personally I think you can disagree with someone in a civil way, but you don’t feel like that. I think that probably also comes across in your dealings with customer service people - like
your insistence that polite and respectful behaviour to a retail worker is ‘sniveling apologies.’ It’s not, it’s just respectful. But you think it’s beneath you - the same way you think someone disagreeing with you is lowered to a level where it’s acceptable to call them thick/swear at them etc.

I don’t answer stupid questions

You don't answer questions that clearly show how stupid it is to buy a product based on an image alone.

I’ve already explained what I meant by that and I’m not repeating myself. You know full well what I meant”

I didn’t actually call you thick. I said you’re either thick or obtuse. Because only a thick person would take from what I said “Wow she LIKES to have horrible customers” . But that’s not you - you were being obtuse to either try and get a rise or just go plain argue.

And I did. So a few years later to be met with ‘Ugh HAHAHAHAHA you I think I have the power to speak to someone else in this organisation Karen’ isn’t exactly what I expected.

Well of course if anyone said this then that’s unacceptable. But I don’t imagine they did. They simply pointed out that the average retail worker dealing with a rude customer who hadn’t read the item information for what they’ve bought is unlikely to be rushing back into the office to type out a furious email to Mr Smyth himself that Mrs X isn’t happy with the website she didn’t read.

If you say so. I still disagree I’m afraid, so we’ll have to agree to disagree there.

Ugh I hate when people are argumentative, obtuse and generally difficult but go “OMG sWEarInG you awful person”. I’d rather have a blunt person swearing than passive aggressive twatishness (TO BE CLEAR: this doesn’t mean I like being sworn at).

And yes when I’ve been mislead about a product I’ve bought I do think it’s beneath me to give a snivelling apology.

Clearly it’s you who has reading comprehension problems.
This was some time ago and at the time there was ONE picture on of ONE of the packs.
HTH.

And you're still hurting over it, bless.