To not know what to do with myself during the day

[Asdson2022]

All 3 of my children now attend full time nursery/school. I'm a sahm unable to get a job. So the obvious answer isn't possible.

The issue is i can't commit to anything and i dont want to spend my days cleaning and being alone :(
Any ideas?

You could still volunteer. Just explain the appointment thing at the start. Everyone needs a bit of something to fulfil them (I’m not saying your kids don’t, but it must be lonely).

There are ways to volunteer that are not fixed times. Although if you want social contacts that might be trickier.

You could join the PTA. They often have tasks to complete in your own time e.g. preparing for a school fete. I mentioned reading before. I read with kids at my DCs school. I have a rough timeslot I go, but I just send them an email to say when I am/am not coming.

This might be trickier in terms of committing time, but things like befriending schemes or volunteering with the local Children’s Centre.

Contact your local branch of Age UK and see if they're looking for befrienders in your area. Basically you call or pop round to see a local elderly person once a week or so to help reduce isolation. It could just be an hour a week, but could mean the world to them.

Start your own business/ retrain and start your own business if you are your own boss then you can’t get in trouble with your employees

Do an online course that will qualify you for well-paid work.
Go to college.

I volunteered as a parent helper in my dd's school. I 'committed' to a time and day but I was essentially an extra bonus pair of hands. They were fine when I couldn't do a week.

Well you aren’t getting much at the moment anyway.

Can’t work, can’t volunteer. What do you want to do?

Volunteering can be fun. I volunteered visiting a care home, chatting to the residents, reading to them, trying to teach some of the ladies to knit. I only did two mornings a week. Another time I went into my son's school to help the little ones to read. Again, only a few hours a week.

I would definitely volunteer.
It doesn’t need to be all day, every day. Just a couple hours when you can spare it.

It sounds like you want the social side.
Have you looked in your local area to see what’s going on?

What about fitness classes?
Or some places do things like crafts or painting classes.

If you are a carer is there no groups on Facebook for carers?
I would have thought there would be sbd they’d have events going on you can get involved with.

You could also ask the school if they need volunteers as then you’re close by if you need to pick the kids up.

Low level committment volunteering where it's great if you are there but they manage it you aren't. A playgroup or something similar?

I used to volunteer at a dogs home where you take the dogs for a walk which I absolutely loved!

Go to the park, go to a museum, get a dog, go to the theatre, see friends for coffee, join a club, go to church, take a class, find a hobby, help a charity. The possibilities are absolutely endless! You can do whatever you fancy!

Why can't you work? When my ds went to school i started working school hours in a school so off for half terms etc

Do a course to retrain in something that will mean you can freelance in/work from home as it’s a good long term plan. Look at borrow my doggy or age uk or something like that too.

Gym or fitness classes also a good idea

Op, I'm in your situation for 2 years now, I've upskilled, did a childcare course and hoping to do some subbing as a special needs assistant in schools. Subbing means I can pick and choose what days I work and gets me some socializing too. I've also taken up running, swimming and attend some groups during the week on mornings. Definitely check out your local library, community center etc

I second walking rescue dogs. It's a win win - plenty of exercise, dogs who would otherwise be cooped up all day get to have a walk, and you get to meet other people at the shelter.
Love it !

I was in a similar position, with speech therapy etc thrown in. Luckily the school wanted helpers. I don't know if there are any free courses starting. I did all the holistic stuff and level 1 & 2 counseling. There's voluntary phone buddies needed by help the aged etc. You book in the time slots, you just have to pledge so many hours a week, could just be two, which might only be four calls a week. Are there any neighbours who need help? Fitness as said is also good.

You don’t have to work to make your time meaningful or fun. I can’t work due to disabilities and I love being at home - I watch stuff on Tv, potter round the garden, go for little walks, take myself off for a coffee and cake, visit places I haven’t been before, spend hours chatting to randoms online (here!), all sorts. Been doing it for 12 years now and not bored yet! I find it quite odd that everyone immediately leaps to “get a job” - sure financially it’s great but boredom / happiness wise I’ve never been more bored that when I used to work - and I’ve done a lot of different jobs from beauty consultant to senior marketing manager, hated every single job.

What about taking on a guide dog puppy? They need to place these puppies with families who will raise them, you receive specific training to do it. Then once the puppy is an adult and fully trained, it is given to someone who needs it.

When I was in this position for a while I used to just look at blocks of time and plan that way - both for the days and weeks. So every day - take DC to school then 9-930 have breakfast in peace and a quick tidy, wash on etc. Then a good long dog walk/run.

Then plan for each day so eg. Mon - house clean, shop etc; Tue help DM with anything she needs doing; Wed/Thurs ongoing project so DIY, decluttering/gardening/volunteering etc; Fri "day off" - meet friend for coffee/lunch, go window shopping, read watch box set whatever.

I'd definitely explore occasional volunteering though I'm sure there must be organisations that would be grateful for whatever you could do on an as and when basis.

Dinner lady at your kids school?

Or even volunteering at the school?

If your kids are in full time care, you can work though? Or is that not correct?

Harsh but true!