Husband pisses himself when drunk

[Lwveeee213]

My husband always pisses himself when he’s drunk. He’s ruined so many beds, couches etc. it was getting harder to hide from my children DS 13 and DD 8. As he once slept in DD bed as I didnt want him in our bed, so DD slept with me when he was drunk and did it in her bed along with our old couch on the same night. I have had to keep making excuses when it’s happened ‘dad spilled water on the couch. Dad spilled tea on your bed etc’ . Anyway tonight he’s pissed himself in his pants. I made him go in conservatory as I knew it would happen with him being drunk and anyway both children have seen, saw his pants and they both knew what he’s done. I’ve told husband it’s the last straw, probably not the best time to tell him when he’s drunk, he got a bit aggressive and shoved me out of the way. My daughter was scared and in tears and my son was comforting me. I feel now I can’t carry on with him as my children are getting older and I can’t hide it anymore and feel them witnessing this is doing more harm than good even if it is a rare occurance. Tonight will probably remain in their memory forever. I feel so bad like I let everyone down if I divorce him but this seems to be the final nail in the coffin!!!
please no judgment

I wouldn’t want him seeing the kids until he’d been to some sort of rehab. Or ever ideally, bit that won’t be possible Long term unfortunately

Did you manage to get him to leave @Lwveeee213 ? Hope you are ok

He needs to stop drinking. End of. Awful that you and the kids have to deal with it.

Hope you are ok, OP.

As soon as the hangover faded and reality kicked in he’s been apologetic but only on text messages we’ve not actually spoke in person!! He has said he is disgraced in himself and embarrassed and won’t but beers again! I have no faith or trust in him as I have heard all this before. The beers he is drinking is nothing to do with his personality and way he speaks to me when he’s drunk.
He still hasn’t left but we are managing to keep out of each others way until he finds somewhere to go. He could go his parents but I expect he’s too ashamed to tell them what is going on.
My daughter keeps asking when everything will be normal again but I don’t think it ever will!

I'd call his parents and tell them to come and get him, I don't think he's got the memo has he? Time to go, beers or no beers.

I am so sorry. I suggested counselling earlier on, and maybe that is still possible, but right now it seems the only solution is for him to give up drinking. He can’t handle it.

I still think that whatever happens counselling for your children, and/or family counselling is in order.

Good luck. I am so sorry to hear of your mess. It sounds like you are doing your best to try to handle it.

If he doesn't want to tell his parents then I suggest you go round and tell them yourself. I strongly suspect he's anticipating you'll forget and things will return to 'normal'.

Rip that plaster off and expose him for the odious little shit he is. The more people know, the more he is accountable for his actions. You're not responsible for him. He made this mess and now he has to deal with the consequences.

OP. Please leave this ridiculous clown of a man.

There are men out there that are good and kind and don't piss themselves. It took me to be almost 40 to locate one but they do exist.

Tell his parents. Call them and tell him that your are over because not only is he an alcoholic who wets the bed he is also a mean and nasty, vicious drunk who uses his intoxication as an accuse to be abusive to you and your children. Tell them to come and get their son. Smash the secrecy.