To think some Mumsnet advice is crap?

[Crapadvice]

Lighthearted.

Lots of very good suggestions, kindness, support, not knocking anyone, just having a laugh here.

But there are a few tired old nuggets that keep finding their way onto threads.

Theres the super aggressive, over the top advice, like someone who is mildly annoyed with their husband has to SIT HIM DOWN. why does this always involve sitting him down, like a dog.

Ear plus or headphones as the answer to any excess noise. Does it not occur to people that we need to hear other stuff for a reason?

No, as in no is a complete sentence. No it isnt. I think my friend is a MNetter, I asked if she was free for coffee a couple of months ago. She said ‘no.’ I haven’t asked since!

what’s the worst advice you’ve seen on here?

LTB because he didn’t wash the dishes once.

I agree with you on some of it except the No thing. Your friend doesn't owe you an explanation about how she spends her time. What did you expect her to say?

The old free half hour with a solicitor 🤦‍♀️
Police NOW!

Absolutely!

However, I have had some wonderful advice by clearly very knowledgeable MNers, specifically in relation to my abusive 'D'M, which has changed my life.

It can be difficult to sort the wheat from the chaff but, after years on MN, you get used to it.

The 'no is a complete sentence' brigade really frustrate me. Who speaks like this to fellow humans in real life?

Or, 'but your child is 18, they're an adult and you're controlling to want to be involved in their life' Give me a break!

And of course, LTB. Need I go on 😂😂

It's just not really a normal way to converse with people is it?

you really think that was OK? I thought it was really rude, and I haven’t asked her since because I don’t want to be shot down like that again!

I think most people would think it polite to offer some surrounding context. I mean, the British way is ‘would LOVE to, but …’ but if that is too round the houses then even just ‘oh not this week thanks, have had loads on and am shattered!’

I mean yes she doesn’t owe an explanation but then I don’t owe my friendship either.

Husband farts and it smells.

he obviously has a health issue, should visit the doctor. You shouldn’t have to put up with the smell. Even though he is brilliant in every other way he is disgusting and you should seriously get your ducks in a row and leave

The advice is usually good, but almost anything can be made risible when you quote it context-free.

If you think it's wrong, it's often better to take it up on the thread in question

Go to OFSTED!!!
On any and all questions something happening in school.

The advice is usually good

Oh come on. No, it is not.

Visit the doghouse. That’s brilliant for terrible advice.

Definitely this.

I also hate where the readers are enjoying the drama and deliberately trying to cause more drama by encouraging the OP to do things they’d never do themselves.

That happens loads, @Badgirlriri

and then some posters run with it and we have massive long CF Zilla threads. And only the OP is true.

Free advice, worth every penny.

Some of the advise on where to live is bonkers I’ve seen some right shithole areas recommended

It’s crowd sourced advice. All (mainly female) human life is here. It’s not as if you are paying a solicitor.

By definition a lot of the advice is going to be crap.

You have to sift through it. Consider which perspectives are interesting. Think about peoples’ qualifications and their motivations etc. Anyone who takes MN advice as gospel is an idiot.

I've just seen the thread with someone concerned about a gang of men conducting anti social behaviour in the street.

Someone advised her to soak them with a water pistol full of piss. Another suggested she play Celine Dion really loud.

I'm not sure either of those solutions is ideal.

Or the A&E ones.

”Yes, you should definitely go to A&E for your child’s sore bottom”

REALLY?

🤣🤣

Another suggested she play Celine Dion really loud.
Oh come on, aren't we still signed up to the European Convention on Human Rights?

It's the 'my neighbour is having loud sex' ones that I see some of the worst. Like 'give them a round of applause'. I'm really sure they won't care.

There are often weird advice re social interaction where you think that is just not normal behaviour.

"I agree with you on some of it except the No thing. Your friend doesn't owe you an explanation about how she spends her time. What did you expect her to say?"

case in point!

By the same token you have the martyrs who chastise the op for even considering a&e when the "nhs is on its knees because of time wasters like you" when the op is displaying symptoms of sepsis or other emergency symptoms. Basically if all limbs are still attached they should just shut up and crack on. Those posters are dangerous.

recently, seen lots of threads with people calling OP a massive doormat for being a bit kind to a good friend and/or wondering how to tell them something they don’t want to hear.

I agree the advice needs to be carefully sifted but at least where there’s lots of posts on a thread there will be someone who points out any advice that isn’t great.

LTB!!!

so many pieces of advice are inflammatory and not helpful, especially when it comes to relationships!