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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

To be told to come in when AL agreed and booked?

233 replies

RosiePosie27 · 25/08/2022 10:11

DH and I are going away (a couple hours away from our home) with our children and some of his family. We are away Friday - Monday at this location and likely home then on Monday afternoon / Tuesday if we don’t stay at MILs house on the way home.

My issue is that I booked these days off months ago (back in Feb / March) and it was approved by a team lead who is no longer in the department. A lady I jobshare with also asked to have one day that we both work together off (Tuesday, day after bank holiday Monday). This was approved by aforementioned team lead.

So, last Friday my manager says as I’m leaving work “there is no one in from your team on that Tuesday - can you come in?”. I said I was away but would see what I could do. I spoke with the lady I jobshare with (and who booked the day off after I did) and she won’t change her plans. She said she wasn’t doing anything during her leave (fair enough) but won’t come in (she has no DC and I have 3 just for reference).

Now I know that we both booked leave and had it approved - do you think I should make an effort to come in on the Tuesday even though it was agreed first that I could be off? Or should I just suck it up and come back early to work even though it will change our plans for our holiday?

Nothing against the lady I jobshare with but she knows I am away and refused to come in on this one day (again, fair enough) but I hate that I had to be the one who offers just to keep the management calm.

AIBU not to come in on the Tuesday, or should I be AINBU to not come in?

OP posts:
Original poster
RosiePosie27 · 25/08/2022 10:12

Sorry, forgot to add - I work in a hospital in a busy department

OP posts:
MingeofDeath · 25/08/2022 10:13

No you should not go in. Have you got any eveidence that the AL was on the rota eg screenshot?

fannyfan · 25/08/2022 10:13

Don't go in.

It's always you because they know you will do it and inconvenience yourself doing so.

Hymnulop · 25/08/2022 10:13

Do you have evidence the leave has been approved I.e on a computer system etc? Then absolutely don't come in. Not your problem.

carefullycourageous · 25/08/2022 10:13

Your leave was booked and approved so you are away on holiday. Say that to your manager.

If they instruct you to come in, you will have to check your contract as to whether leave can be rescinded.

spangleswereace · 25/08/2022 10:14

Absolutely do not change your plans!
I worked in the NHS and they were always trying to do this, it's their mistake so let them sort it.
They'll cope without you and you won't get any thanks for changing your plans and going in!

AnneLovesGilbert · 25/08/2022 10:16

It’s your manager’s problem, not yours or job share woman’s. Enjoy your holiday.

Treabrea · 25/08/2022 10:16

Nope nope nope. I'd put it in an email that you had X date approved on y date by Z team leader. You will be away and not coming in. You have your annual leave correctly booked.

It's up to your team leader/manager to sort. That's why they get paid to do that job.

ImperfectAlf · 25/08/2022 10:17

spangleswereace · 25/08/2022 10:14

Absolutely do not change your plans!
I worked in the NHS and they were always trying to do this, it's their mistake so let them sort it.
They'll cope without you and you won't get any thanks for changing your plans and going in!

This, with bells on.
We're not paid enough for this shit.

WishDragon · 25/08/2022 10:18

It doesn’t matter who it was approved by. Your leave was approved first. It’s not your problem if management then approved hers.

Maybe the managers should cover… (I work on the nhs so get that this is a fucking joke).

Theluggage15 · 25/08/2022 10:18

I wouldn’t even have said I’ll see what I can do to them. Just say you can’t come in. It’s booked, it’s not your problem. Help them this time and they’ll think you’re a soft touch.

Original poster
RosiePosie27 · 25/08/2022 10:19

Thanks all - yes it was all approved on the roster and the team lead said he could cope without us for one day. I was a bit put out as I was with my manager all day and then as I was leaving she just hit me with the “oh by the way, on that Tuesday there is no one from your team in and we need one of you here” so I was put on the spot and felt obliged to say “I’ll see what I can do” but she knows we are away as she asked me earlier that day.

OP posts:
Cloudonthemountains · 25/08/2022 10:19

As an ex NHS manager, I would never have asked you to come in during your leave. As you've said you would think about it, I'd just say ' I've thought it through, and it won't be possible for me to come to work during my leave'. You don't need to say anything else, or apologise.

Snowiscold · 25/08/2022 10:20

No, don’t go in. Your leave was booked and approved. End of.

NiceTwin · 25/08/2022 10:20

No way would I be going in.
Ridiculous of them to ask you to change your plans.

Blackdiame · 25/08/2022 10:21

The fact that you have children and she doesn't isn't relevant to this situation.

You don't have to go in nor make the effort to try to cover the shift but equally as she has also had her time off approved so it doesn't mean that she does either. Your manager needs to work this out.

SolasAnla · 25/08/2022 10:23

I am guessing that there is no reciprocated benefit to you eg you will be "owed one" if you do go in?
And that your booking was the first AL booked?
If so I would push it back to the manager to solve.
The other staff member may have something on but is not willing to say that to work mates. Or has realised that management take advantage of "nice" staff

DatingIsDifficult · 25/08/2022 10:23

You’ve booked it off. It doesn’t matter what you’re doing or where you’re going, you’ve booked it off.

IncompleteSenten · 25/08/2022 10:23

No and you shouldn't have said you might try.

thesurrealist · 25/08/2022 10:25

I'm an NHS manager and these things happen from time to time. We just suck it up as our own fuck up and cover ourselves - I'm senior management but perfectly capable of doing a bit of my own admin for example if it's needed. Neither of you should be pressured to come in on leave.

Btw her plans for her leave and whether or not she has children are totally irrelevant to the situation. Leave was requested and approved, that's the bottom line otherwise we get into situations where people with no plans and or no children end up sacrificing a day off because their needs are classed as less important.

Sunnyqueen · 25/08/2022 10:26

Basically this

To be told to come in when AL agreed and booked?
silverclock222 · 25/08/2022 10:32

No I wouldn't change and it is irrelevant you have kids.

Original poster
RosiePosie27 · 25/08/2022 10:34

@Sunnyqueen i love that!!

OP posts:
fannyfan · 25/08/2022 10:35

The fact you have children and she doesn't isn't relevant. I hated being told I had to work Christmas every bloody year because I didn't have kids at the time, there was no fairness there at all. See above for booking anything in the school holidays..

She's entitled to not do anything on her annual leave and still not come in

CustardGoodJamGoodMeatGood · 25/08/2022 10:36

No way, if you'd booked an abroad holiday you wouldn't be changing your flights to come home earlier would you? You're on holiday, it's their issue, not yours.