Going back to work 2 weeks after birth?

[Jacklinjane]

I'm 34 and have one child who is coming up to 21 months. LO has a disability and his dad gave up work to take care of him while I returned to my job 3 weeks after having a caesarian section. I work in IT so it's not a physical job. I expressed at work and had a little fridge beside my desk and everything worked.
The plan with the next one is to do the same but after speaking with GP today she's said I'll likely need another section. So I've started making preparations for this and my friend yesterday told me she thinks I'm not being fair on new baby or LO1 by going back to work that soon.
For context, I get a basic wage but I get huge bonuses every month that are almost triple my basic wage. Maternity doesn't scratch what I earn and what my mortgage costs.
My husband would be going back after 2 weeks if he was the one working so why is it not fair that I am? My work are accomodating and no one even minded the loud humming of my breast pump for so many hours in the day! If I'm physically able to go back, why should it matter?

PollyRockets It says within ‘certain contexts’ not ‘all contexts’. And like I said- men can’t flipping breastfeed which has been shown to develop attachments like nothing else.
Fact stands that babies do BEST with their mother breast feeding them.

Cant understand why as someone who clearly works in the field you are arguing about this!!

@Janedoe82

Does that mean formula fed babies, adopted babies, surrogate babies, nicu babies, babies of gay men all have brain damage?

The sexism on this this thread is depressing as fuck.

No- obviously not. But nothing beats breastfeeding and lots of interactions and cuddles with the mother for at least the first few weeks.

That is not sexist it is a biological fact.

I'd be surprised if your HR department would agree that you're fit to work only 2 weeks after major abdominal surgery, it would invalidate their employee insurance and lay them open to a whole load of issues if anything went wrong.

Usually you would need to pass a 6 week checkup post op to show you are fit to work.

NICU babies can still be breastfed, in fact the doctors and nurses constantly emphasise the importance of doing so as early as possible.

Of course babies can and do thrive in alternative situations but the biological reality is we are mammals, we evolved to feed directly from and be cared for primary by our mothers as tiny infants and on a societal, statistical level it is this pattern of care is optimal for human infants.

Please show documented proof of the significant improvement on childhood outcomes based on actively breastfeeding and attachment.

Not the benefits of breast milk, as the baby will still get all those benefits from the pumped breast milk.

Don't worry I'll help, there are limited studies into this, the ones that have been down however show "No significant differences in attachment security between breastfeeding and bottle-feeding were reported. The initiation of breastfeeding directly after childbirthh_ was not related to child attachment"

Wow, I wouldn’t even take a kitten away from its mother at two weeks, let alone a 2 week old baby.
Personally speaking, I could never be apart from my child so soon.
Surely, you want to spend as much time with your baby, bond with him/her, establish feeding etc.
Not sure what the point of the child was really.

Do you say the same to all the men who return to work after 2 weeks?

I think is very true and a good point. OP do whatever works for you.

Evidence of benefits of breastfeeding and attachment

Did you even read the findings?

"No significant differences in attachment security between breastfeeding and bottle-feeding were reported"

Yes I did. If you read the key findings it says
Key conclusions:

The findings provide some evidence that breastfeeding might contribute to child attachment security.

All I'll say is my brain was mush after giving birth.
The worst of the physical recovery was done by 2 weeks, though I was still bleeding and night sweating. I had a SVD and with my second no stitches.

Physically I could have sat at a computer all day and worked for sure. I could even have managed the train commute, but I don't think my brain would have been up to much. My job relied on my brain so I feel like I'd have set myself up for failure.

It's up to you. I personally needed time to recover from my c-section - it is after all major abdominal surgery. But you've had one before so you've likely got a fair idea of what the recovery will be like for yourself.

I do think it's sad that fathers have to return after 2 weeks yes, just not as sad as mothers. Fathers also don't have to recover from labour, stitches, possible complications, possible infections as well as piles, sore, leaky boobs and nursing at all hours through the night if mum breastfeed.

@calmlakes

I actually agree was just interested in the previous posters take on it

(I don't agree in surrogacy etc though where a child is deliberately denied their mother or father)

But in answer to the OPs thread it's a tough one isn't it. I'm the main earner and had to go back at 5 months - I personally couldn't have left mine at such a young age. It's time you never get back

Pollyrockets FYI

gpifn.org.uk/secure-attachment/

Does having been able to breastfeed give some mothers a sense of achievement? I mean great, good for you but not sure why you are on a forum and seem to be actively trying to make the OP and others in general feel bad @Janedoe82

Granted, I may be projecting but this thread is not about breast feeding, it is a question of whether of not it is possible to return to work after two weeks. It is.

Again

It doesn't appear you read the links you try to use

Nothing on that page indicates BF being necessary for attachment

It mentions responsive feeding which can be done via breast or bottle

It's the serve and return of need that needs to be met. When this is done with a bottle the need is still being fulfilled

@Janedoe82

It then follows it up by saying 'However, more prospective studies are needed to draw a solid conclusion.'

The only studies in this area can't find a statistically significant difference to be able to say one way or another

But please do go on, it's funny watching you try and back your beliefs up and fail every time

Responsive feeding is not the same as breastfeeding. It is an alternative when breastfeeding isn’t an option but it is not the same.

The NHS is spending millions on breastfeeding and peer supporter. If there was no benefit that could just say ‘express milk and use a bottle’. Would save them a huge amount of money!!

Maybe we should all take a few minutes to reflect on this post being a first time post, on a highly emotive subject with several factual inconsistencies with an OP who hasn’t returned since throwing a grenade in

My first DD was an unexpected preemie and had an extensive (4+ months) stay in NICU before coming home. As a woman who can't breastfeed (mastectomies) I was very upset that I couldn't at least pump for baby while I was only allowed to look at her. When it finally came to the time I could hold her, the hospital spent time teaching me about Kangaroo Care - being held skin to skin. It helps preemies get better faster. I took great comfort in being told that, even though I couldn't breastfeed, antibodies seep through my skin and into baby, protecting her.

Then you wouldn't be struggling this much to find any evidence it's that beneficial

All the listed core benefits to breast feeding relate to the milk itself over the act of feeding from your breast

Which is an action that can be replicated in other ways

The reason the NHS advocates for breast feeding it's it's hard to go straight to pumping from birth, BF needs to be established ideally first which takes a few days to a couple of weeks. And pumping is expensive, so it might put people off if their official guidance was to pump.

Can anyone explain why we are comparing a woman going to work and leaving the baby with its dad to children who have been abandoned and or removed from their parents?!

Absolute nonsense