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To wonder how my friend is so wonderfully organised and put together!
284

iamspt · 06/08/2022 14:05

My friend, a new friend, makes me feel a bit scummy! Maybe scummy is too strong a word, but I feel very messy in comparison

She has a disabled DS and a toddler DD.

House smells and looks clean. Not artificial clean. It just smells fresh and crisp.

Kids bedrooms spotless.

She irons everything of the DC. She said she sets aside time once a week and does it watching something good

Her car is clean. Despite kids. Smells wonderful. Her DS has high care needs. She kindly gave me a lift recently. He was hysterical and she gave him some crisps. We got back. He was playing with blocks in the garden. She told toddler she would be 5 minutes and asked her toddler to think of 5 things beginning with P, something like that. In that time she whipped her hoover out, hoovered up all the he had made with the crisps and gave it all a quick go over with some spray and a cloth

Kids have their pjs laid out whilst getting ready for bath. Their beds are immaculately made. Clothes all put away neatly and ironed.

She has all their bags packed and sorted the night before (her DD goes to nursery one day a week). All her son's clothes are labelled with this cute little ink thing that says his name with a little symbol of a bear next to it

Her children are always so clean and fresh. When they get out of the bath they're moisturised with something she's used since they were little babies. Perfectly turned out even for bed! Her DD is SO good! And she's 2.5! A really hard age. She doesn't ask for anything, if she gets upset my friend explains why she can't do or have it, then proceeds to make her daughter feel as if she's in control for example by asking if she wants to play with her bricks when she's home? Since she likes the ones here? Would she like that or to play with her colouring pad? Her DD then feels in control and responds well to this

My 3 DC were nightmares in comparison. My house constantly a mess still and they're 2,7 and 8.

I ask them to do stuff all the time and it's never done. I don't even have an ironing pile. My wash pile is high enough as it is without any additional piles!

Their uniforms have a quick sharpie on them that just about makes out their names. They look bloody scruffy a lot of the time. Their beds aren't made like her DCs. I don't have a 'special' bubble bath they use, I just slap any old thing in. They don't smell beautiful and have special moisturisers. My house is always a mess in some way, never clean really, just about her away with it

I'm never on time for child's activities. Meanwhile my friend juggled her special needs child and her DD's swim and baby dancing class. And her DS swims

Honestly, what's her secret. Everything is so well done and put together

She is a WONDERFUL friend. No judgement. So kind and really listens to me. This isn't a thread to slay her off

I just wonder how I'm such a creature of things better left unsaid whilst she achieves all this

Did I mention her disabled child is awake from 4am? And her H isn't helpful with that so she does it all too? Argh.

post edited by MNHQ to remove potentially identifying details.

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ShirleyPhallus · 06/08/2022 14:08

People like this just get on with it. A lot of people waste a lot of time procrastinating or doing other stuff. My husband is one of those people who sees crumbs and cleans them up then and there whereas I usually think I’ll get around to it.

he’s just very naturally organised and on the go - takes stuff upstairs, puts things away as he goes, if he sees something needs doing he just does it

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Bernadinetta · 06/08/2022 14:08

Does she work? Do you?

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hulahooper2 · 06/08/2022 14:09

no idea , I had a friend like that too , but I worked fulltime and she didn’t , btw is that his real name you mentioned on the labels?

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Tillsforthrills · 06/08/2022 14:09

I think some people are amazing with having routine and some are just naturally chaotic. A perfect example of how she operates is taking the 5 mins to hoover car - most would just hop out and deal with it another time.

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HailAdrian · 06/08/2022 14:11

God, i don't know her and I'm jealous! I have 3 children, one with additional needs too and I feel overwhelmed most of the time. If I didn't work full time but somehow still had loads of money, I think I'd do better.

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HollowTalk · 06/08/2022 14:13

You'll probably find that she is the kind of person who has always enjoyed being active and also doesn't use social media that much. I wonder whether housekeeping skills come from her mother?

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Desmondo2021 · 06/08/2022 14:14

I think I'm probably in your friend's category to be honest. It's truly just a case of being organised, motivated and disciplined.

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HailAdrian · 06/08/2022 14:15

Also, solidarity. And remember that comparison is the thief of joy.

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DeadRight · 06/08/2022 14:16

I had a friend like this when my DC were small. She was extremely organised and just all round a very active, proactive, cab-do sort of person.

I’ve got ADHD and am the Queen of unfinished projects and can’t be arsedness.

People have different energy levels and motivations. I just don’t care enough to keep a show home. If I did care, I’d do it.
Do you?

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gunnersgold · 06/08/2022 14:18

She sounds like me , I don't stop ! Always cleaning and tidying etc

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luxxlisbon · 06/08/2022 14:21

You just have to do it, there is no secret. It takes the same amount of effort for her to keep her house clean as it would you.
Why do your kids look scruffy most of the time? Honestly I find it takes the same amount of effort to dress them clean and tidy really.
Do a quick once over of the living room before bed every night while the tv is on.
Always clean up as you go with dinner.

I have a full on toddler, work full time and my house is still mostly clean and tidy. It would stress me out having piles of clothes not put away.
Obviously it isn’t 100% spotless all the time, but it’s very tidy a lot of the time as we keep on top of it.

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blebbleb · 06/08/2022 14:22

It's easy to compare yourself to others. She probably makes it look effortless but I expect she's constantly on the go to keep up. Some people thrive on that. Our house is the opposite too. Messy and lived in but I'm happy with that. My car is also a tip!

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CornishTiger · 06/08/2022 14:28

I bet she’s not posting on Mumsnet that’s why!

is that child’s real name.

Sounds a bit controlling tbh. You do you. Pick up some tips if you want….

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Teadrinkingmumofone · 06/08/2022 14:28

Desmondo2021 · 06/08/2022 14:14

I think I'm probably in your friend's category to be honest. It's truly just a case of being organised, motivated and disciplined.

I'm the same. Something needs hoovering or cleaning or whatever I just do it, it's the only way to keep on top of things! Don't personally find it difficult to stay organised in any aspect of life, I've liked things to be 'just so' since I was a child

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ChocoButterfly · 06/08/2022 14:29

You could ask what her secret is. My guess is that's it's natural for her. She probs thinks in an organised way and/or only needs 5 hours of sleep.

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Notonthestairs · 06/08/2022 14:31

Just checking that's not the child's actual name in the Op?

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BMW6 · 06/08/2022 14:34

My niece is like this, on the go from 6am till 10pm barely sits down to eat. Never lounges around watching telly.
She looks after 2 DC, chickens, dog, cat, sheep, garden, veg plots, huge house (no cleaner). Her DH does minimal to help as he's devoted to his work.

She has a moan now and then but generally she's very upbeat, has a "can do" attitude. Is also very slim and fit, not surprisingly

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sunsetsandsandybeaches · 06/08/2022 14:35

Is that the little boys' real name in the OP? You might want to report to MN if it is.

I think some people are just more organised than others. I can't stand mess and I can naturally remember all sorts of things. I'm always early, never miss appointments and my house is immaculate. I don't find any of it difficult or stressful, though - it's just how I am.

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Dalekjastninerels · 06/08/2022 14:36

I am like this if I don't relax.

I like to relax Grin

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iamspt · 06/08/2022 14:40

CornishTiger · 06/08/2022 14:28

I bet she’s not posting on Mumsnet that’s why!

is that child’s real name.

Sounds a bit controlling tbh. You do you. Pick up some tips if you want….

Of course it's not his real name!

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iamspt · 06/08/2022 14:41

Notonthestairs · 06/08/2022 14:31

Just checking that's not the child's actual name in the Op?

No!

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TheHorrorOfIt · 06/08/2022 14:42

I’ve had periods in my life when I’ve been super-organised like this; you have to have a lot of energy to stop you crashing and not getting out that last load of laundry or whatever, but it is doable and you make life so much more easy for yourself.

Trying to get back to that position now actually; clearly failing as the laundry is still in the machine and I’m on MN with a glass of wine in my hand. I’ll consider myself prodded!

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TheBikiniExpert · 06/08/2022 14:43

I have a friend like that. She doesn't spend anytime online...

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BitOutOfPractice · 06/08/2022 14:44

I bet she’s not on social media.

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iamspt · 06/08/2022 14:45

BitOutOfPractice · 06/08/2022 14:44

I bet she’s not on social media.

She is! Facebook Instagram (not one of those wanky accounts)

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