Is this how men talk? Is this acceptable? Met police court case

[Dalint]

What police 'allegedly' talk about when discussing rapes, DV victims, people with disabilities.....

www.lbc.co.uk/news/met-cops-sent-racist-and-sexist-whatsapp-messages-to-wayne-couzens-group/

"Detectives found material on the WhatsApp group stored on an old phone belonging to Couzens, the former officer who was jailed for life over Ms Everard's rape and murder."

It goes on further

"in the chat, jokes were made about West London being a "f Somalian s*hole", while in another exchange, Mr Neville said his experience of "struggle snuggles" had helped him pin "a 15 year old girl going mental to the floor".

Btw struggle snuggles was their term for rape.

"In another exchange, Mr Cobban said domestic violence victims "love it" and "that’s why they are repeat victims more often than not".

on and on it goes.

This is who protects us? This is who we report crimes to? This is who we are supposed to trust and respect?

AIBU in wanting to fucking protest outside that court?

I met more sexist and racist men when I worked in the police than any employer since or than in my male acquaintances.
I don't know percentages and am not interested in some sort of statistical contest.

Jesus. This is the lowest thing I've ever read from anyone connected to the police force.
Making it all about them, and trying to detract from the victims' experience.
Typical.

I had 'sex' with a policeman who drove me home when I was 16.

I now work in the peripherals of our local Police/ Crime Commissioner and she seems to not like women. Especially me; due to an IT error (not my fault). Makes me wonder what would be done for me upon my murder/disappearance.

Please don't tell us to "wise up". That's some pretty poor optics for a profession which is currently under fire for being so massively out of step with public opinion.

As I've said upthread, this defensiveness from serving police officers is exacerbating the issue. All the denials, all the insistence that it's just "a few bad eggs" - this is exactly what's standing in the way of change.
The people on the inside refuse to recognise that there's a problem - and, yet again, victims of crime feel like they're being shut down.

To answer your final question - no, if I was a victim of any sort of crime nowadays, the police would be the last folk I'd be phoning.
Utterly pointless, and I speak from bitter experience.

"Jack whatever your name is" is crazily similar to the uninterested response I got from the police force when I reported being raped at the age of 15 by two strangers, and again when I tried to get help for being in a situation of DV when I was in my 20s.

You can see my name clearly from my post surely? Or doesn't it matter what my name is?
It certainly didn't matter to the police officers I reported it to back then, so at least there's some consistency.

I also grew up in care, and I understand the emotional consequences of that.
My family background is fucked up, and I'm genuinely sorry that yours sounds similar.

I don't think I'm going to contribute to this thread any more, because I didn't want to be upsetting anyone.

I'm just finding it really weird that so many serving officers are jumping in to defend their colleagues. It comes across like you're not accepting that there's a problem?

Anyway, I'm sorry for making you personally feel bad (I can't find the flowers emoji)

🤔

I'm just finding it really weird that so many serving officers are jumping in to defend their colleagues. It comes across like you're not accepting that there's a problem?

^^This.

This thread is not about or for individual police officers to come on here to say that they are a good person trying to do their best in a difficult job. It is not about any one person. Of course there are good and committed individuals in the police. This thread, however, is acknowledging that a toxic workplace culture exists in many UK forces. That far far too many angry and controlling men, and women, are drawn to the police and then create hell for vulnerable women.

I don't understand how police cannot realise, or furthermore, that it's not a condition of their employment contracts, that anything they do or say or write represents the WHOLE police force and that they must conduct themselves in an exemplary manner both at work and in private.

The terms of my last employment contract stated EXPLICITLY that anything said by me on Social media such as Facebook etc., which potentially brought the firm into disrepute, could be considered gross misconduct and could result in instant dismissal.

The police officers posting here are really not doing themselves any favours, or indeed giving a positive impression of the police force. When you say that this type of attitude from this trio is dark humour and you have to deal with tough situations is not helping the general public to get a good impression of you. It's doing the opposite! You're willing to back their behaviour up at any cost.

?

And let's talk about the 'policing' of the vigil for Sarah Everard after she was raped and murdered by serving Met Police Officer Wayne Couzens.

And about the contrast between how that was policed, and a football game that descended into hooliganism shortly thereafter.

I am very sorry if individual police officers feel unappreciated, disrespected, and demonised. But something is very rotten in the state of policing. As a woman I no longer feel I can trust the police. I no longer feel I can tell my daughters to trust the police. So where do we go from here?

So many good points on this thread and it’s a shame that most of the officers here can’t accept they are part of what needs to change. If the ‘good ones’ can’t even identify change needs to happen early then we are all screwed

I'm suprised that this is a revelation to you.

You only have to look at how the Police have treated POC. And if that treatment did lot affect you, why on earth not?

Most racists are usually sexist as well.
Why is it only know that people are only just beginning to realise that the force is full of (not all) dangerous men?

We are all human and any injustice, at the hands of them, should have been an injustice to all. Instead, for years, it was whataboutery when a black person (male or female) was killed.

So, no, I'm am not shocked. Just shocked that a lot of people didn't smell the coffee earlier..

Oh we smelled the coffee alright and even drank the coffee. But it's like asking a prisoner why he didn't stand up to his captors, or asking a child why they didn't report the abuse they were suffering at the hands of a parent.
It's very hard to fight a force who inherently has authority over you.

I don't know how to change it. You can see on this thread that even the self-professed good police officers are not willing to fight it from within. Instead they're taking it as a personal attack. It's not. No more than my previous statement that what one police officer does reflects on the whole force, what we say about the whole force does not reflect our views on every individual within it.

If someone is a dick to me in a supermarket, I can shop around. I don't ever have to go back there. We don't have that option with police! Being vulnerable, we're even worse placed to effect change.

Where do you even start?