Is this how men talk? Is this acceptable? Met police court case

[Dalint]

What police 'allegedly' talk about when discussing rapes, DV victims, people with disabilities.....

www.lbc.co.uk/news/met-cops-sent-racist-and-sexist-whatsapp-messages-to-wayne-couzens-group/

"Detectives found material on the WhatsApp group stored on an old phone belonging to Couzens, the former officer who was jailed for life over Ms Everard's rape and murder."

It goes on further

"in the chat, jokes were made about West London being a "f Somalian s*hole", while in another exchange, Mr Neville said his experience of "struggle snuggles" had helped him pin "a 15 year old girl going mental to the floor".

Btw struggle snuggles was their term for rape.

"In another exchange, Mr Cobban said domestic violence victims "love it" and "that’s why they are repeat victims more often than not".

on and on it goes.

This is who protects us? This is who we report crimes to? This is who we are supposed to trust and respect?

AIBU in wanting to fucking protest outside that court?

It's vile!

That article in the OP made me feel sick.

The Met is rotten, I'm not sure Londoners have any trust left. Just vile.

I don't know how they can talk about victims like that. I know how they treat the general public (with disdain imo) but if this is how they view victims, can you imagine how they view those they arrest whether innocent or not? These messages were all exchanged while they were on duty too. Is there a whistleblowing system in place for these 'allegedly' good cops who exist to use to weed this sort out?

Mostly cops claim that they joined the police force to help people. Those messages would suggest otherwise.
Do they have to pass any psychiatric evaluations prior to joining the police?
I was shocked to find out that they only get 12 weeks training before they're let loose! 😧

I’m a police officer and am absolutely disgusted and horrified by these messages. I’ve never been part of or seen any exchanges remotely likely this in my career.

Throw the book at them but please believe there are bad apples in the force and the majority do want to help.

And to add, I would and have called
out inappropriate behaviour in the past and raised it with senior officers (not along these lines but different issues)

A dear friend of mine was in the met, formerly married to another met police officer. He was absolutely vile to her, both physically and mentally. It eventually ended when he pushed her down the stairs. He kept his job, she had to leave. There’s a real issue with workplace culture there and I think it’s probably far more ingrained than many people think. They need a serious overhaul.

Struggle snuggles is probably one of my disgusting things I’ve ever heard in all of my life.

To add: I obviously don’t believe there’s an issue with ALL, and I have a lot of respect for the police force, but the bad apples are seriously bad apples and should never be in a position of authority/power

As a single woman who has dated extensively in her 30s - This does not surprise me in the slightest.

What sort of behaviour have you reported @Foreverlexicon?

How are we supposed to believe that any police officers are nice people?

I don’t trust any of them
not one

Agree

Of course you always get the woman who say 'my robert is not like that' - only to find he has been wanking to onlyfans and swiping on Tinder behind her back for years.

Woman are waking up thanks to access to the media and realising the collective gaslighting that has been projected on woman for years.

I remember meeting one woman who was 42 - two kids with her husband who was socially elite. She admitted she was 'smug' (her own words) - and thought she was 'safe' - she openly admitted that she would laugh at her friends who struggled to date and would get ghosted/used for sex etc etc. It transpired her own husband (in the police) was having multiple affairs with woman aged 19/20 during the length of their marriage and her left her for a 21 year old.

I am really starting to believe the only way to win in the game is to not play at all - build a life alone.

you now must have a degree or do a degree level apprenticeship to be in the police. When I left school you could join with 5 passes at 16. So for a long time it (and the army) were one of the few ‘professions’ you could join if you weren’t bright enough to do A levels. Raising the education standard will help but take a long time to achieve change until more educated recruits get promoted up the ranks. For decades the police recruited from a pool of immature white boys with few qualifications. This is basically how that group behaved at school and then they just went into a job with a similar group / pack mentality to the school locker room.

Bloke here, it's disgusting, personally I dont know any men who talk and act in such a way. Any men who talk like that in my company, or online, I'd release my inner tiger on them.

I can’t go into details as it’s still being investigated. It wasn’t anything along the lines of this behaviour but their behaviour led to a case being prejudiced unfairly.

I think the same was as everything else. The media aren’t going to report the good stuff are they? That doesn’t make a story. It’s stereotyping to assume they are all the same.

I am no way defending the behaviour of these people. Just pointing out I am ‘one’ of them and this behaviour disgusts me just as much and saddens me.

Thats Tiger - that does give me hope. ❤️

Thanks *

I went out with a policeman once. He thought nothing of driving through red lights, walked straight into cinemas without paying, threw rubbish out his car window. He laughed when i challenged him, said he just showed his warrent card and that was the end of the story. The sense of entitlement was mind boggling. God knows what years and years of that leads to. Behaviour like these bastards probably. And the excuse of "we didn't even realise it was wrong..."

Total moral vacuum.

We didnt go out long....

I am really starting to believe the only way to win in the game is to not play at all - build a life alone.

I agree with this so much.
Unfortunately women are not willing to do that, so men get to behave just as they want and still have a family life and they have sons and here starts the new generation of the same crap.

@YouAreNotBatman

Yep currently have a friend who moved her boyfriend of three years into her beautiful flat. Its already started. He is telling her to clear out her clutter because he does not feel at home in his now home (that he did not pay for).

She was so upset the other weekend 'I just need to get rid of all my stuff'. She is a natural eccentic with a tendency to hoard. This man keeps mentioning how skint he is and how he could never afford to rent alone or have his own flat.

Very clear to me what is happening here but such is the patriachy.

Exactly this.
I was a victim of DV over a number of years, and the police couldn't have been less helpful. In fact, they frequently made the situation far, far worse.
I would never trust them.

Creating more communities like Umoja village is hugely tempting tbh.

Police forces and armed forces (and their rape and abuse culture) and men as a class - both perpetrators and the many many more who do nothing to challenge those men and by doing so, condone it and block change (insert fucking namalt disclaimer here cos hurt feelings) are about the biggest danger women face globally and I honestly believe nothing is ever going to change.

Look at the removal of women's rights and erasure of women's spaces that is happening right now. I can't help but feel this is men tightening their grip as they believe women are slipping out from under their control

Also, I find it really frustrating, dehumanising even, to read current police officers saying that they have never come across any crass behaviour from their colleagues, and if they did, they would report it.
It's not the point. Reporting it or not, absolutely nothing has changed for women victims of crime in decades. The police force is rotten to the core - saying that you work in the force, but you've never noticed it, just further denies us being heard.

Don’t be too grateful, @Meowmeowmeowmeowmeow - same male poster on a different thread gleefully reported that he’d said on discovering his wife had cheated on him, “Good luck to him with that, it's like waving a pencil in a cave.”

So yes, it is how men talk.

All the police officers in the force that claim they've never reported it, because they've never seen it, I call bullshit.