To be annoyed with MIL

[LeafHunter]

DHs family always go away each year. It’s him, his four siblings and everyone’s partners and children. We’re going on 2nd august.

MIL had just text to say she’s tested positive for Covid and so has cancelled the family holiday. She said she can’t guarantee she will be testing negative by then. FIL is negative currently.

Im annoyed as we’ve booked all flights, car hire etc. PIL pay for the villa and we all pay for the rest. This is widely out of character for them.

I can see her POV though.
Villa for that many people is wildly expensive- if she's positive I assume she can claim on travel insurance.
If she doesn't PIL would foot the bill and not be able to go?

I would be annoyed OP - the holiday is well over 10 days away and surely the 2 of them doesnt outweigh the holiday of many others. Cant you all chip in and pay to cover their costs? Very high handed of PIL.

She just unilaterally cancelled the holiday for all of you?! That's nuts.

Personally, I think it's awful that she didn't just have her children and their families go to enjoy the holiday. If I were her, there's no way I would have ruined it for everyone else just because I got covid.

What? I'd think she'd lost her mind! It's like 2 weeks away. And you won't be able to claim on your travel insurance. So your only option is to try to find somewhere else to stay. She could have asked you guys to pay for the villa between you if they couldn't go. She's really left you in the lurch, I'd be really angry.

That’s over two weeks away. Is it in a place that you have to have a negative test result to enter? I’m surprised there wasn’t a discussion over what to do even if she was determined not to go. The rest of you could have taken over the booking and still gone ahead. Will be much harder to find something suitable at this point. I would be annoyed.

Can’t she just fly out later if she is still positive? Everyone helps chip in a bit for her new flight?

I’ve just had covid and felt fine and tested negative after 5 days. I know it’s different for everyone but she should be fine in 2 weeks time. I hope you manage to find other accommodation.

That's ages away, she'll likely be fine by then!

That's crazy. She's got ages to get better and even if not that's everyone's holiday she's cancelled.

Has DH said 'mum wtf?!' To her yet?

If it's wildly out of character I'd say she is panicking or there is something else going on.

I'd book another apartment/villa and still go.

Sounds like she's scared. Can you gets the flights refunded, or find your own accommodation?

Ditto Waltzingwaters! Couldn’t believe it after 5 days, not many symptoms either. Felt very lucky.

I'd also book another villa and just go (if you can!). That's really strange, there's plenty of time to test negative. I can understand she might be able to claim on travel insurance (but depends on insurance and if there's restrictions in place!) but it's unlikely the rest of you will - five DC, their partners and grandkids all now without somewhere to stay? That's horrendous! It could have at least been a discussion not a notice.

We can’t get a refund on our flights or car hire as they’re booked in our names and we’re not positive. It’s a Spanish island - I don’t think it’s a negative test to get in. It feels like a knee jerk reaction.

BiL has called and spoken to her but her reasoning is she can’t guarantee she’ll be negative and if she/FIL aren’t there it won’t be the same. I get that, but we’re all a bit stuck. One option is that the siblings and us try and book the same villa she cancelled, but I know at least one of DHs sisters wouldn’t be able to afford her share of it.

DH is at work and can’t check his phone there so I don’t think he knows yet. I get on with his family but not to the extent of being able to say “wtf is happening”.

She is being unreasonable, she should at least have given you all the option to split the cost of accommodation

I'd speak to the others going and arrange separate accommodation if you can, so you don't all lose out on flights

I'd say something else is afoot here, that doesn't make sense to me. Can your husband or one of the siblings not have a chat with her and find out where she's coming from? Ideally they'd have spoken to you first so you would have had the option of taking on the cost of the villa and splitting it four ways? Really odd, yes.

Sorry, cross posted, Leaving you all in the sh*t like that is so off!

BIL has spoken to her and she said she’s worried about not being negative and then infecting others on the plane and that it would be more stressful for everyone if she wasn’t there to help look after the grandchildren.

DH has been asked to speak to her as he’s the most logical and closest to her but he won’t be home till 7pm. No idea if it’s possible to un-cancel a house?!

What a meanie and completely unnecessary.

That's a real dick move - unless she's offering to reimburse you all for your flights which I suspect she won't be!

Gosh she's a bit dramatic and obviously sees herself as the matriarch of the family doesn't she! How does she think you cope for the rest of the year with the kids?

I hope you manage to rearrange

Has anyone said "so what do you expect the rest of us to do now then?" To her? Like how does she think this plays out for you all who've spent a fortune already and she's left you without accommodation. It's really shitty of her and I'd be surprised if all the siblings ever agree to another holiday when it can use be pulled from under your feet. Surely most of you have had to book leave from work aswell?

I was told by hospital staff that you're not really infectious anymore after day 7, and previously government said it's fine to return to work etc after 5 days if you feel well.

I'd still go and book alternative accommodation, I'm sure you could still find a hotel, Airbnb or something else even if it's short notice.