My partner and I are planning a wedding for this December, this is of course quite a fast turnaround (due to family illness) but we've been lucky to get a venue, DJ and photographer booked with relative ease so it is all going ahead!
We've opted for a hot buffet for the meal - likely a Christmas carvery type situation (a nice one!) because we felt that was a bit more relaxed and also, honestly, it was cheaper. I also thought people who have particular food habits (like members of my family!) might find it less stressful than a three-course sit down affair. We're serving plenty of wine and soft drinks etc. It's a twilight wedding so I don't think anyone should be going hungry.
I've just had a reaction from a family member who seems to think this is akin to serving beans on toast, and it's thrown me into a panic. Will everyone hate this and think we're being stingy?
I'm trying not to get sucked into everyone's expectations as I know that's how costs get out of hand.
Aibu to serve a buffet?
AIBU?
Aibu to serve a buffet at our wedding
MimosasInFrance · 18/06/2022 10:00
doodlejump1980 · 18/06/2022 10:06
As long as you have people serving it and not a free-for-all as the first tables to go up might eat everything / going for 2nds before everyone else is served!
1VY · 18/06/2022 10:07
I don’t think it’s stingy. But can be very awkward for some guests, especially
older relatives
guests with disabilities who can’t stand in a line for 10 mins balancing a plate
anyone with dietary requirements as often there’s nothing for them or if there is, it’s scoffed by the first few tables who go up
guest who are at the last few tables as there’s usually hardly anything left
You also need to stop the first tables going back for seconds befroe the last tables have been for their firsts.
I think it works better if you have staff serving the food, as it’s stops the greedy bastards who push the front taking more than their fair share ( eg Dhs mates from rugby who think it’s a laugh to take mountains on food and leave it on the table uneaten ) .
Basicallh you need someone from the waiting staff to MANAGE it, perhaps calling up tables a few at a time and prioritising older relative etc .
1VY · 18/06/2022 10:07
I don’t think it’s stingy. But can be very awkward for some guests, especially
older relatives
guests with disabilities who can’t stand in a line for 10 mins balancing a plate
anyone with dietary requirements as often there’s nothing for them or if there is, it’s scoffed by the first few tables who go up
guest who are at the last few tables as there’s usually hardly anything left
You also need to stop the first tables going back for seconds befroe the last tables have been for their firsts.
I think it works better if you have staff serving the food, as it’s stops the greedy bastards who push the front taking more than their fair share ( eg Dhs mates from rugby who think it’s a laugh to take mountains on food and leave it on the table uneaten ) .
Basicallh you need someone from the waiting staff to MANAGE it, perhaps calling up tables a few at a time and prioritising older relative etc .
PinkiOcelot · 18/06/2022 10:09
we had a hot buffet for our wedding. It went down really well. The food was fantastic and was commented on by all of the guests.
it just meant that they got up from their seats, chose what they wanted and sat down again at properly set out tables.
Ignore the family member. They don’t get to have an opinion on your wedding.
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1VY · 18/06/2022 10:11
YY, I cross posted with @whiteroseredrose
Let vegetarians go first though. I went to a 'do' where all the meat eaters decided to give the vegetarian option a try so there was nothing left for me!
I am gluten free and this always happens to me. The people who go “ Oh look there’s something gluten free, I’ve always wanted to try that “ .
Then I’m left with a plate of lettuce and white rice. And an apple for desert.
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