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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What would you make of this message?

410 replies

Glittersparkle76 · 15/06/2022 07:24

My partner and I have been together on and off for nearly 10 years and we have a 9 year old daughter.He works away in hospitality and comes back to me and my daughter when he gets days off.I woke during the early hours and found this message he had sent,all lovely until I read the part when he said he had loved others more!,I thought WTAF??,why would you even need to say that to me?,are some things best left unsaid??.He's meant to be coming back late tonight for 3 days but now I feel like telling him to fuck off and don't bother!.Am I overreacting to this message?,I feel like I'm second,third or even fourth best now and don't think I will ever be able to get that comment out of my head.
Even if I felt in my past I had loved others more than I do him,I would never say that to him as I don't feel it needs to be said!.
I would love others opinions on this and how they would feel if their partner sent them this message.

What would you make of this message?
OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
RhiRhi1996 · 15/06/2022 07:26

Hahaha wtf kind of "romantic" message is that. Why would he say that at all?

Yea that wouldn't make me feel very good to be honest. Kinda like, the girls I liked/loved more , didn't want me so you're the best i got

Very strange

Merryclaire · 15/06/2022 07:28

WTF?! If I received that message I would most likely end the relationship. How bizarre.

waveyourpompoms · 15/06/2022 07:29

It’s a fucking strange message. The fact that he says “right now” implies he’s okay to love someone else in future, that he doesn’t see you as a long term relationship.

He’s not committed to you, sorry.

WhatTheWhoTheWhatThe · 15/06/2022 07:29

No your not over reacting, he’s either quite full of himself or negging you or both. I’d reevaluate the relationship.

Harridan1981 · 15/06/2022 07:30

Wtf, is he drunk?

CrapBucket · 15/06/2022 07:30

What a charmer. Not.

KangarooKenny · 15/06/2022 07:32

I think it depends on the context of the conversation. It sounds like he’s being entirely honest. What went before to get this reply ?

PetersRabbitt · 15/06/2022 07:32

It’s the right now part that’s the killer really. Just now, but only because it’s your whose available “right now”

dump him

EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall · 15/06/2022 07:32

Is he drunk? I wouldn't want to see him either

Antarcticant · 15/06/2022 07:33

It's self-indulgent, poorly-written nonsense. I wouldn't want a relationship with someone who came out with this kind of rubbish.

Might he have been drunk at the time?

HollowTalk · 15/06/2022 07:33

Awful message in so many ways!

So you and he live together? Do you have children together?

User280905 · 15/06/2022 07:34

I would assume he was drunk. What a weird message

PetersRabbitt · 15/06/2022 07:34

The more I read it the more I cringe 😂😂

ladydimitrescu · 15/06/2022 07:34

It's the "I don't love anyone more than you - right now".

Do yourself a massive favour and fuck him off, he's a twat.

BaaCake · 15/06/2022 07:36

Eh? What's he on about. This is an awful message.

Hoardasurass · 15/06/2022 07:36

Sorry but that message sounds as if he is/has or intends to cheat.
Not what you want to hear but the other thing is the way he keeps saying "right now " to me says if someone else comes along that he loves more than you he will leave you for them

Matchingcollarandcuffs · 15/06/2022 07:37

When DH and I first got together he went away to a conference, and rang me up very drunk saying Sibérie asked him for a shag and he said no.

I think he was trying to show he was committed in his own, weird way. Men are strange.

Original poster
Glittersparkle76 · 15/06/2022 07:37

He had just finished work so yes he would have had a drink most likely.There was no message previous apart from a few hours earlier which was just a normal chatty message about work,our daughter etc.I just don't get why he would feel the need to say that?.I also honed in on the 'right now' part too.

OP posts:
BakedTattie · 15/06/2022 07:38

Is he on drugs?

none of that message is normal

FOJN · 15/06/2022 07:38

I wouldn't know what to make of that but it was sent shortly after midnight, is it possible he'd been drinking and screwed up. It's all very confused. He's quite unnecessarily telling you about an unrequited love and he loves you more than anyone else RIGHT NOW but he hopes you'll grow old together. I'd be tempted to ask him what he was hoping to achieve.

harriethoyle · 15/06/2022 07:39

What a bizarre message. You're not being unreasonable to be upset. He's negging you!

Ethereall · 15/06/2022 07:39

The finger emojis alone would make me get rid

BaaCake · 15/06/2022 07:39

Has he had a previous relationship and she's died or something? It all just seems a bit much to start bringing someone else into it!

BaaCake · 15/06/2022 07:40

Ethereall · 15/06/2022 07:39

The finger emojis alone would make me get rid

Yeah what are they about?!

itsgettingweird · 15/06/2022 07:40

Ethereall · 15/06/2022 07:39

The finger emojis alone would make me get rid

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Must admit that but annoyed me more than the arsehole message!

I also noticed the loved others more and right now.

Odd message to just send someone.