What would you make of this message?

[Glittersparkle76]

My partner and I have been together on and off for nearly 10 years and we have a 9 year old daughter.He works away in hospitality and comes back to me and my daughter when he gets days off.I woke during the early hours and found this message he had sent,all lovely until I read the part when he said he had loved others more!,I thought WTAF??,why would you even need to say that to me?,are some things best left unsaid??.He's meant to be coming back late tonight for 3 days but now I feel like telling him to fuck off and don't bother!.Am I overreacting to this message?,I feel like I'm second,third or even fourth best now and don't think I will ever be able to get that comment out of my head.
Even if I felt in my past I had loved others more than I do him,I would never say that to him as I don't feel it needs to be said!.
I would love others opinions on this and how they would feel if their partner sent them this message.

Eurgh, he writes like someone I used to date years ago.

My ex writes shit poetry an 8 year old would be embarrassed about, posts them on FB AND signs them off at the end including his middle initial 🙈

I wouldn't even care so much about what the message means; I'd dump him purely for the way he has written it. The confidence of these planks is really quite breathtaking.

I would suspect he was drunk when he wrote it and maybe that he had a guilty conscience.

I’ve got the ick on your behalf, OP

Yes it does sound like the stupid ramblings of a drunk.

I would fuck him right off after that message 😂 That man wouldn’t be coming near me again!

That message feels quite creepy to me, and more than a bit neggy.

you say you’ve been off and on with him, sounds like a turbulent relationship. Has his behaviour been problematic in the past?

Surely this is a song lyric or a quote from eg Love Island? I am profoundly embarrassed on his behalf if he came up with that by himself.

Utterly utterly grim

Those emojis alone would be enough for me to finish but the message is clear-remember when someone shows you who they are believe them... he has well and truly showed you @Glittersparkle76 RUN!!!!!

Was he drunk?

its a horrible thing to say, Love is love, you either love someone or you don't.
To spend 10 years with someone and then say you have loved someone else more and that your only loves the most RIGHT NOW is disgusting.

It doesn’t even make sense?

The second paragraph says he has never loved anymore more than he loves you….and then just a few words later he says “even though I’ve loved others more.”

And when he says he wishes you were with him to prove it to you….where exactly are you? It reads as though you live in different countries or something?

Comes across a bit like a message I got from a guy i was dating about his ex
i quote

‘it would be good for you to meet her, she’d be able to help you and tell you what makes me tick’

Im still stupidly disappointed things didn’t work but reading that back I clearly need to wise up!

Very odd.

I hope by someone he ‘loved more’, he’s referring to those ‘first love’ feelings that you get as a teenager. And is just him expressing himself really, really badly. As in ‘You’re not my first love, but you’re my last’ type thing.

I’m not surprised you’re pissed off.

It sounds to me like it was meant for someone else.

So you're Mrs Right-Now, not Mrs Right!

Was about to say exactly the same.

But given the on off nature is he really the one for you anyway? What do you actually see in him?

Maybe you should just send 🖕back?

For a bit of context,I'm 46 and he's 52.We have been on and off for 10 years,(mostly on) as when we lived together we got into a bit of a rut I suppose with neither of us making the effort we should have.We had time apart and at one point both got into a year long relationship with someone else.We came back together 4 years ago and by this time he had a new job and was working away at a holiday complex so me and my daughter live alone,which is the way I prefer it.We both like it that way and it does work,we go and stay with him at weekends if I'm not working and know all his colleagues etc so everyone knows we are together.He has been saying lately he feels lonely and really wishes my daughter and I were there with him but I don't want to go yet as I don't feel ready,for one reason is I don't want to disrupt my daughters education,2.I have my own house and secure job here and 3,I recently lost my 22year old son to Bowel Cancer and I can't face leaving this house yet as his bedroom and all his stuff is here,(he was diagnosed at 17 so never left home due to treatment etc),exactly the way he left it and I can't bear the thought that I'd be leaving it all behind.His memorial is local too and I go a few times a week to just sit with him and the thought of moving miles away from him breaks my heart.I still have the majority of his ashes at home but I still feel like I would be leaving him behind and just the thought of that alone makes me want to cry.

He sounds really dumb.

That did make me LOL 😆

Yes it does, he's saying he's not ended up with any of the others he's loved more, but he has loved others more. Nasty git

@Glittersparkle76 your update is so sad, I’m very sorry to hear about your lovely son.
I can’t believe he is sending you these creepy messages when you’re in this situation. You must be completely devastated about your son and just trying to focus on your little girl,and this maniac is sending you this shit?!? You do deserve so much better.

I think that healthy romantic relationships are committed, stable and fun with lots of laughter. This guy sounds the opposite of this - the message sounds emotionally manipulative. I think you would be happier on your own.

Oh, Glittersparkle, I'm so sorry to hear about your son

Do whatever you feel is right, don't let anyone try and pressure you into anything.

sorry for the derail, but oh my God, he expected you to confer with his ex about how to keep him satisfied, sexually I’m guessing here. Wow, I don’t think I’d know whether to laugh or cringe more at that. Fancy thinking you’re so important that two women, including your ex, would have a conversation about how best to make you happy. That’s not even going into him immediately setting you up in comparison. What a bullet you dodged there. Christ on a bike, you couldn’t make it up.

I'm really sorry to hear your update OP.

This man sounds awful, self-indulgent & am utter head-wreck. That message 🤮

Is it time to reconsider being with him?