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Would you be put off by a man who doesn't drive?

838 replies

ItDoesMyHeadIn · 11/06/2022 12:25

I was. Cancelled the date. I'm being too fussy apparently. To be fair my friend is married to a man who doesn't drive and he's amazing. Neither of my parents drive. The guy I was going to date could afford it, he just can't be arsed. He is happy to walk everywhere or use public transport. Up to him. But I would want to be with someone who can literally take the wheel sometimes. Like fuck do I want to be the one driving 8 hours up to Scotland for a holiday, or being the one to always collect the takeaway etc. I'm pretty traditional and sometimes I admit I would want my man to pick me up and take me out for dinner etc (fuck off crazy feminists, yes I can take myself out for dinner). I didn't actually realise how much of a deal breaker this was until it was put in front of me! Interested in opinions...

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Partypoooooper · 11/06/2022 12:27

Deal breaker for me.

I also would date someone with an Xbox/playstation.

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Passmeaplacard · 11/06/2022 12:28

always put me off too when I was dating. I just didn’t feel that they would be an equal partner. Different if you live in London or somewhere with amazing public transport but in Yorkshire where I am it’s an issue

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TheVolturi · 11/06/2022 12:29

Yanbu because us mnetters like to perv on our men while they're reversing with their arm on the headrest, you cannot miss out on this op.

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Pennox · 11/06/2022 12:29

It wpuld slightly put me off too as long as he wasn't young and just hadn't had the chance to learn yet. How old was he? People who take an academic path eg undergrad, postgraduate, PhD could easily be students for most of their twenties and therefore not have the time or money (or need if mainly hanging about uni campuses or in cities) until 30 odd. A few of my friends did PhDs and didn't learn until late twenties when got first job.

Generally though people who dont drive put me off, rightly or wrongly, mainly due to family members who expect to be ferried everywhere.

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tigger1001 · 11/06/2022 12:29

My partner of 18 years doesn't drive, so not an issue for me.

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MarmiteCoriander · 11/06/2022 12:29

If someone had a medical issue and couldn't drive, that is very different to just being lazy. I'm not sure how you'd know that BEFORE going on the date? Confused

I'd be worried about down the line, IF you have children and what would happen if you or children needed an urgent GP/hospital visit? Getting groceries etc? I guess you pay for deliveries? There are many people that manage- but it wouldn't be my preferred choice.

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HellFireClub · 11/06/2022 12:29

fuck off crazy feminists

🤔Charming

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Agrudge · 11/06/2022 12:30

Partypoooooper · 11/06/2022 12:27

Deal breaker for me.

I also would date someone with an Xbox/playstation.

Why???

Would rather a partner be at home with the family gaming ?

Or

Down the pub with his mates getting pissed?

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HellFireClub · 11/06/2022 12:30

Baffled how you think walking and getting the bus everywhere is LAZY, compared to jumping in a car.

It's 10x more effort to walk or get public transport.

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coffeecupsandfairylights · 11/06/2022 12:31

It's a dealbreaker for me.

Because we live somewhere very rural and without a car, you're stuffed.

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BobbinHood · 11/06/2022 12:31

Not an issue for me, I have a life that doesn’t require driving so a non-driver would fit into it just fine.

Obviously you’re not unreasonable for this to be a deal breaker for you, everyone is different.

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Furrbabymama1987 · 11/06/2022 12:32

My husband doesn't drive but is planning on learning soon. Can't really afford lessons or car at the moment though so not sure when. He does play X box but he doesn't take the piss with it. We all need something to do to relax or have fun and his is that so I'm not going to begrudge him that when he makes us all happy.

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moonlight1705 · 11/06/2022 12:32

My DH doesn't drive although he's learning now we have DD. I drove on our honeymoon around California and it took us 14 hours to get to yosemite...I did kinda wish he could drive then.

However, he is vastly fitter than me and will happily walk/run most places without needing or wanting lifts.

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rainbowandglitter · 11/06/2022 12:33

TheVolturi · 11/06/2022 12:29

Yanbu because us mnetters like to perv on our men while they're reversing with their arm on the headrest, you cannot miss out on this op.

Oh yes this! Grin
I wouldnt find it attractive if a guy couldn't drive.

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drumandthebase · 11/06/2022 12:33

It really would put me off.

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howtomoveforwards · 11/06/2022 12:35

fuck off crazy feminists

wow.

If someone had a medical issue and couldn't drive, that is very different to just being lazy

on which planet is not being able to drive a trait attributed to laziness? Seriously?

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BiscoffSundae · 11/06/2022 12:35

The drivers I know are far more lazy than non drivers, my sister drives her cat to the corner shop! Lazy is an odd way to describe not driving

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FatAgainItsLettuceTime · 11/06/2022 12:35

My DH has never driven, we've been together 22 years, have an amazing daughter, he's funny, intelligent, sensitive, likes horror movies and obscure books, lights up when he's chatting rubbish with DD, has supported me through the loss of both parents.....

So I'd say that the whole picture is probably more important than whether or not a person drives a car.

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dunpaying · 11/06/2022 12:35

@BiscoffSundae I think you should report your sister to the RSPCA ! 😂

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RockStarMartini · 11/06/2022 12:36

I hate the way it’s referred to as ‘doesn’t’ or ‘don’t’ drive. It’s a basic life skill and unless there’s a medical reason why you can’t drive I think most adults should be able to.

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ItDoesMyHeadIn · 11/06/2022 12:36

Obviously if it was down to epilepsy etc that's a different matter. But his reason for not driving isn't due to a medical issue or an environmental protest. He literally just can't be arsed with it and either walks, taxis or buses it everywhere. Nowhere near London, not countryside based but I'd say 95% of the people I know do drive. I just couldn't be with someone who doesn't drive. So many things would get on my nerves.

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ComDummings · 11/06/2022 12:37

It would put me off if they were above the age of 20. Which makes me a dick to be honest because I didn’t start driving until I was 30.

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BiscoffSundae · 11/06/2022 12:37

dunpaying · 11/06/2022 12:35

@BiscoffSundae I think you should report your sister to the RSPCA ! 😂

Oh no 🤣🤣

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Hugasauras · 11/06/2022 12:38

Yes because it makes life harder and disproportionally uneven when only one person can drive, especially when you add kids into the equation. And I think it's a bit of a life skill that I would expect a competent and solvent adult to have when possible (obviously notwithstanding medical issues or financial issues precluding learning). I'm sure this will offend, but it's just a personal opinion relating to my own life partner. If other people don't want to drive then fair enough.

You can have dealbreakers for whatever you like anyway.

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HellFireClub · 11/06/2022 12:38

BiscoffSundae · 11/06/2022 12:35

The drivers I know are far more lazy than non drivers, my sister drives her cat to the corner shop! Lazy is an odd way to describe not driving

Is the cat very fat from being chauffeured around? Does it sit in the passenger seat whilst she nips in for sardines? 😁

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