Is Best Friend ignoring me 🤔

[Safarigiraffe]

Hi I have a best friend whom I’ve been friends with for years now however lately past 3 months she ignores me as in leaves me on read & will reply back 2-3 days later saying she was busy & when I’ve said to meet up (always me that initiates the meet ups never has been her) she always says she’s working or let’s me down last min on the actual day - could this be the end of our friendship? Not sure how to address this with her as I really do want to bring this to her attention without her thinking I’m being clingy if that makes sense

It is an option. Anything more is stalking. She will talk to you if she wants to, you cannot force her or bombard her to answer you.

Then you need to be honest. Say, We have been best friends for 10 years and I am at a loss to understand why you don’t respond to my messages or want to meet up. I feel I deserve an explanation. I need to know what I have done, if anything.

I understand you may have what you think are good reasons but until you tell me I will not leave you alone.

I understand you may have what you think are good reasons but until you tell me I will not leave you alone

Are you taking the piss @SchoolThing ? That is harassment!

No not taking the piss. I am putting into one post what OP has been saying m thread in the hope she may realise how bonkers she sounds. There is zero logic to her plan but she is determined.

@SchoolThing Sorry! I misunderstood, i thought you meant for her to really write that! Not with it this morning!

to leave her alone isn’t a option

Sorry OP, but that comment would be alarm bells for me. Yes it sucks if you've been friends for that long, but she's not obliged to be your friend and you now sound hard work tbqh.

These threads are always sad. The OPs friend doesn’t want to be their friend anymore, that much is clear. But OP hammers away determined to somehow force the former friend’s hand as if that could possibly work. And with every post it becomes clearer and clearer why the friend has distanced themselves.

It is an option if it's what she wants! Friendship is by mutual agreement.

I would take a small break of three or four weeks and see if she contacts you in that time.

@SchoolThing That's it exactly.

I have just messaged her to see if she’s ok & what’s going on I will update soon

That will be interesting to know

I’m actually nervous of what she will say as in will there be something she says that is about not wanting to know me 😞

Equally if she just don’t reply back

Well message has been read but she’s not replied back yet

It may just be that the friendship has run its course for her and, if that's the case, asking her how she "sees the friendship" will make her run for the hills.

I don't see the point in confronting her over the fact she is ignoring your messages, she obviously knows this.

If someone wants me out if their life I would back right off, no amount of confronting will make her suddenly want your old friendship back.

I just asked her if all is ok as she’s not messaged me now for a few days

This sounds horrible of me but I had a best friend for many years and eventually found myself just not having so much in common with her and other new friends as I grew older that I could relate to so much more and enjoyed spending my time with and I felt like I just had to let her phase out so my texts and meetings became further apart until eventually I stopped all together and then ultimately deleted her because I found the friendship a drain to upkeep and very forced on my behalf as we were childhood late teen friends and as an adult we had just grown into different people. I didn’t feel bad if I’m being honest but I couldn’t have ever text her to say I just didn’t feel the friendship anymore and walked away as it would have felt mean even tho I know what I did wasn’t the kindest. Sometimes people just grow apart and I feel it’s a normal part of growing up , I would honestly just not text her at all and see if she makes the effort with you as if she doesn’t there is your answer x

Hi OP. Hope you are okay. I’m at the start of distancing myself from best friend of 6 years. She updates social media but doesn’t seem to be bothered to reply to my messages. She either doesn’t reply, replies at 2am or few days later. What gets to me is she replies to other people. She shares posts on social media. So I have accepted she does not care about me as much as I care about her. It hurts but not much I can do. Just leave it. Even when it’s urgent she has left me read. Where as when it’s urgent for her I drop everything to help her. It’s sad but I’m done with it.

If she doesn’t reply to your latest text then it’s time to draw a line under it and send no more texts asking her anything. It’s not nice for you but you really can’t send any more communications if she doesn’t reply or if her reply is distant.

*on read.

Yes only replying if she gets back to me if not will leave it

She is ignoring you for some reason.

It's good you've messaged her.

After 10 years of regular communication I'd be miffed unless there is a good reason.

Op it may well have just run its course. I met a friend last summer she made no effort since. Ive just accepted we grown up now perhaps your friend just not as invested in the friendship? Op thats hard. Has she replied

That’s the thing - 10 years of regular communication & meet ups to suddenly nothing is not on so I feel I at least deserve a explanation

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