Is Best Friend ignoring me 🤔

[Safarigiraffe]

Hi I have a best friend whom I’ve been friends with for years now however lately past 3 months she ignores me as in leaves me on read & will reply back 2-3 days later saying she was busy & when I’ve said to meet up (always me that initiates the meet ups never has been her) she always says she’s working or let’s me down last min on the actual day - could this be the end of our friendship? Not sure how to address this with her as I really do want to bring this to her attention without her thinking I’m being clingy if that makes sense

XelaM - this is 3 months of no effort on her behalf while I’ve been putting in most effort

You've had this thread going on for over a week now and have pretty much ignored a lot of very good advice.

Yes it's sad if you have been friends a while, but friendships really shouldn't be this difficult. You both clearly have different needs and views on what a friendship should entail, so you both need to find different friends and move on. Life's too short to drag this out.

Stop putting in "effort" and find someone else to chat to. Being a friend isn't supposed to be a job.

I’m already taking a step back to see how much effort if any she puts in

I had the same situation albeit not best friends. I've tried talking, asking what's wrong, been gaslighted, made to feel like I'm a crank, my feelings not been considered, messages ignored etc.

I tried one more time to ask to meet up and was ignored. So I've deleted the number an she will be ignored if she contacts me. This happened yesterday.

Friendships shouldn't be this hard. If this was a man I'd be saying move on.

I really would let this slide and don't respond. She knows your number and where you live.

Don't set yourself up for a fall. Do you have a partner? Other friends

@Lagertha6 I think I need to do the same. When I message she does not reply. When she does she is asking for something and totally ignores my message. Then after a few days without me messaging her she will randomly message saying miss our chats and I message back to ask how she is and she does not reply but is posting on insta and constantly online. Like you say friendship shouldn’t be this hard.

Asking how someone is is a bit woolly. I hate typing long answers so prefer specific questions " what have you been up to" " do you fancy going for a walk". I much prefer in person conversations and have had enough messaging after a couple of messages where as some people never stop replying and get upset when you stop and someone has to be first to stop

Friendships sometimes just end. It's a sad part of life but it happens a lot. Treasure your happy memories and move on. It hurts, it's a bereavement of sorts but life is big and wonderful and something just as good may be around the corner.

Update - she’s blocked me now I guess it’s her loss, after being best friends for many many years, messaging/meeting up it is sad however I will be ok & just move on now

@Safarigiraffe Did you send any more messages for her to block you?

No I did not send no more messages at all

Even if I did it would of been to see how she was as we agreed to give it another go

What has led to her blocking you? That's a bit extreme if you never even had an argument?! Have you tried asking mutual friends why she's upset with you?

Yes I have asked mutual friends why she has blocked me & we haven’t had a argument but more a disagreement about her being more distant with me past 3 months when before she was actually ok with me

The only surprise here is how long it took her to block you. So many of us warned you but you chose to ignore. I would have blocked you long ago.

Yes I chose to ignore cos I was of the thinking she was my best friend and I thought maybe things would change but stupidly I now know

Also she wanted to give things another go

Aw sorry to hear that hun . I've had multiple friends like this over the years but I've always walked away first. It's hurtful she sounds mean. 2 to 3 times a week texting isn't a lot if you are meant to be close xxxx

She has done the right thing for both of you. Time to move on now.

I started reading this thread feeling pretty sympathetic to you OP but every update got more frustrating, you've ignored loads of good advice. Your ex friend has blocked you now and I'm not surprised. Leave it be now, for your sake and for hers