to not want to cover up when breastfeeding?

[sparklygothkat]

I find it hard to bf when covered up. but last week, my sil insisted i covered up while at her house, in case it embarrassed her son ( who actually spent all his time upstairs with my DS1) I get hot and bothered with a blanket over me...

It's just eating. That's all.

It's honestly not a big deal. Really.

Really, honestly, truly.

It's like having a cup of tea. You just barely notice anyone doing it after the first thousand cups or so.

No-one thinks it's strange.

whay, thenkyou.

Well said FandZ. On a slight side issue that's why I won't visit my ils at the moment. They reserve the right to have an open (gas) fire with no fireguard or screen and have it on when the 3 young gcs visit. I reserve the right not to visit them. They also find bf a bit distasteful judging by their faces but as they aren't ones for confronting issues then they won't say it to my face!

And to make my final point before I go to actually do something productive with my day...

This whole online "conversation" has occurred whilst feeding my dd. If we weren't in the same "virtual living room" I wouldn't have had the pleasure of chatting to you all.

I'd have been on a thread on my own.

Sniff.

Have a good afternoon, ladies!

I would be really . It's a natural thing to do and would have been not a bad thing if her DS had been in the room and seen it. She just sounds like she's the one with the problem...she has issues.

lol, i started this while feeding callum, and have fed him twice while its been debated and am feeding again...

Hmm YANBU I would have said no would you expect me to put a blanket over his head if he had a bottle in his mouth?
The more people who are breastfeeding are encouraged to hide the fewer people will feel comfortable with it as it becomes unseen and taboo subject.
B*llx to your SiL - sounds like you are getting on brilliantly!

yanbu at all. Not been online for a while, really glad you're still breastfeeding despite all the problems you've had.

oh yes still feeding, am determine to keep feeding him till at least 1 (I gave up at 5- 6 months with my other kids)

oh and her husband tried to throw away my washable nappy!! They must think I am a right hippy!! What with Breastfeeding and washable nappies!!

YANBU at all. I never covered up with a blanket and would have been mortified if anyone had asked me to in a similar situation.

I think I'd echo the suggestion that since "her house, her rules" it would be worth letting her know that you won't be visiting until you've finished bf since she has a problem with it. She can come to you and, of course, your house, your rules!

Actually, I find the faint suggestion detectable in some posts that the only way to be discreet is to cover up with a blanket puzzling. As far as I'm concerned, I was never anything other than perfectly discreet. I don't believe anyone ever saw anything of my nipples (except my dh and, early on, the mw). While still in hospital, I was twice approached by mw's who obviously couldn't see that I was bf'ing - and that's when I had less than 5 days experience of doing it!

I still don't understand why we need to be discreet!

Given that no-one is seriously suggesting getting them out and waggling them in anyone's face, what is, really, the problem with breasts being seen in the context of FEEDING A CHILD!!

sorry, got a bit hot under the modesty bib there.

Mine are not big enough to waggle

I can barely manage a jiggle really

more like a shiver

OBM, My personal preference was to be very discreet. I don't have an expectation with others at all. But I wasn't comfortable with owt visible on myself.

I suppose that I am lucky (??) that we don't see them much, but on boxing day we went to theirs and I fed him and they didn't even notice.. but NYE she made a huge thing of it..

I don't even cover up when the outlaws are here lol!!

Sue, of course, entirely a matter for you.

I'm more talking about the fact that lots of us feel that we have to justify ourselves by showing how discreet we are. As if the important thing here is not to 'offend' anyone (flip it round, and that would seem to imply we are doing something offensive I think). As if there is in fact something inherently shameful about it, despite our protestations. IYSWIM.

Interesting thought. In our culture, where breasts are viewed primarily in their sexual context, then there is a balance to be struck, because it's not unreasonable to think (as is often proved by threads like this) that there will be folk who are a little uncomfortable with it.

I think it's unreasonable to expect babies to eat in the toilets. But people aren't being unreasonable by feeling conflicted about seeing breasts when in most other public contexts we would be expected to be embarrassed by the sight of a womans breasts.

It's all about gradual cultural re-education, I suppose. But that's always better achieved by people being thoughtful and gentle in their approach than it is by, say, mad women sitting in Starbucks with their top-half entirely naked. So I presume that's why people are keen to say they are discreet - probably to distinguish themselves from the over-zealous naked lady.

lol very true Sue. I said something along these lines earlier; I do understand the conflict, tho i am v depressed by it and quite cross. Imo it's a bigger problem in society, which I was getting with 'what are women for' earlier.

Gosh though, I really am tempted to try the full topless option! It must be an astonishing feeling. Naked! In public! I almost want to post Breast/Bottlefeeding to see if anyone else does it like that.

i just pmsl at bat!!