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To not want neighbours coming in my garden?
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Hosta13 · 19/03/2022 17:45

I don't particularly like my neighbours. They have a lot of unruly children, and the family as a whole are generally quite loud and irritating. That said I'm happy to keep myself to myself, and accept noise is a fact of life when you live in a built up area and houses are only a few feet apart.

What I do object to is them intruding (for want of a better term), into my property. The children used to ride bikes on my driveway, I now keep my front gated locked. They also used to frequently climb over the 4ft fence between our properties into my back garden. I replaced it with a 6ft fence last year but have had suspicions they still enter my garden as things would be moved, or I'd hear a ball being kicked over but when I'd go outside to look there wasn't one there.

Today I was in the garden and found 4 of their balls that must've been kicked over earlier today which I threw back - I always do throw the balls back, although sometimes it might be a day or two as I don't go out in the garden every day, am at work, can't be bothered going out there if its raining etc. They very rarely knock to ask for the balls back and rely on me throwing them over but if they do ask I give them back straight away.

So about half an hour later I hear all the kids in the garden (its warm and sunny here today so I've got windows and doors open)whining to the parents about how their balls are in my garden, and can't dad just lift the fence panel again so they can retrieve them. There are 2 that it seems I missed, ones in a bush and another one in the far corner and despite having 10+ balls and the 4 I've chucked back, they need these ones. They've seen them from looking over the fence I assume, they have a climbing frame near the fence which they can see over into my garden from. So anyway dad kind of fobs them off ineffectually but its clear this is what they've done more than once for them to even suggest it. They're still going on about it an hour later and saying well we'll climb over her gate then and get them that way.

This isn't on is it? I wouldn't have dared go in someones garden when I was a child and there's no way my parents would have allowed it either. I'm now trying to work out how I can stop them lifting the panel, because clearly although they didn't do it today they have and I'm sure will again. It feels really intrusive and unpleasant.

They're not tiny BTW, ages range from 8-13.

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stuntbubbles · 19/03/2022 17:47

Turn the hose on them! Can you set up a motion-detector sprinkler system? And plant some very spiky things.

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Sunbird24 · 19/03/2022 17:50

Fence panel security brackets or clips… either to secure the panel to the post or to the next panel along.

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Hosta13 · 19/03/2022 17:51

I have got quite a few spiky plants along the boundary. But there are 15 panels between our 2 houses, and some are alongside a concrete path so I can't plant there.

A motion sprinkler might work although I'd need to know what panel they were coming through to position it right.

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MushroomCow99 · 19/03/2022 17:52

Stab their footballs to death and throw them back. Grin

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Lockheart · 19/03/2022 17:53

Have you tried talking to them?

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mum11970 · 19/03/2022 17:53

Tap a wedge in low down on your side and they won’t be able to lift the panels.

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Hosta13 · 19/03/2022 17:58

I don't think talking to them is likely to achieve much, they clearly have no respect for me or my home and privacy.

Friends have said I should stab the balls but I don't want to escalate matters and be the bad guy. They're the sort of people that if I did that would call the police on me.

I will try and put some wedges in the panels or get someone in to do it for me (I'm not the most DIY minded person). Would be good if that stops it.

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2catsandhappy · 19/03/2022 17:59

Fake camera and CCTV sign. Or real motion sensor camera. I got mine for under £10 off ebay.
I did not know panels could be lifted! Anti-vandal paint? Extra screws and nails?
I had to resort to bamboo poles spaced in my borders to stop kids jumping in. Utter pain.

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Inthesameboatatmo · 19/03/2022 18:00

Secure the fences and get trellis and put spiky plants in said trellis. Also threaten them with police for trespassing and damaged to property its not on at all. You have more patience than me op.

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BOOTS52 · 19/03/2022 18:02

I would put some netting up high over the fence so the balls cannot get in and try and sort the fence. I wouldn't mind handing back the balls now and again but it would drive you mad all the time. You are right not to stab the balls as you have to live beside them and it would only escalate the situation. I would actually say to them when you are in the garden that you do not want your fence lifted up as it will damage it. It seems the kids are driving their own father insane also as he did not want to lift the fence.

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Hosta13 · 19/03/2022 18:03

The panels are between concrete posts so they just slide in, if that makes sense. Meant it was easy to take the old ones out, but does also mean they can lift them as easily. Hopefully not once I get the wedges put in.

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VioletLemon · 19/03/2022 18:04

Grow something along the top of fence. Sink posts into concrete. Don't throw the balls back.

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junglejane66 · 19/03/2022 18:05

I used to do similar as a kid, the trick is not to get caught by either the NDN or parents.

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walksen · 19/03/2022 18:05

As previous posters have said you can get brackets to secure them to the posts or you could use metal braces to secure the bottom to the concrete gravel boards

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Nicoise · 19/03/2022 18:05

Do you have a dog that could puncture the balls? I used to rush out into the garden to stop my dog getting hold of footballs that flew over from next door, but then I thought sod it, let the dog have them. I was so fed up and stressed from the constant "blam, blam, blam!" of balls against the fence. So the dog had them and I'd say "Sorry! Dog got to it before me!" it only took 2 or 3 balls for them to stop using the common fence as a goal.

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Hosta13 · 19/03/2022 18:06

He obviously has lifted the panel before now for them, and let them climb over the gate too. They kicked a ball repeatedly against the fence on the other side til it broke despite parents telling them not to. Thankfully that was their fence and not mine but it gives you some idea.

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superram · 19/03/2022 18:08

I lift the fence for my kids. I don’t do it when the neighbours are in and I’ve asked my neighbours, we got on and they don’t care-and that’s the issue, you don’t get on. One side I wouldn’t care, the other I’d be miffed.

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Hosta13 · 19/03/2022 18:09

No dog sadly, they've got one but I don't. So as well as the children incessantly screaming and shouting there's also a dog barking and howling! I look forward to moving even though I can't move for a few years yet.

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Hosta13 · 19/03/2022 18:11

Even if we did get on I wouldn't want them lifting the panel. As we don't speak ever, I really don't want it happening. It feels like an invasion of privacy. I'm always on edge.

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girlmom21 · 19/03/2022 18:11

If you heard them discussing those balls and where they were why didn't you just throw them back and call over the fence that if they ever need a ball back to just knock and ask?

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tonicwaterparty · 19/03/2022 18:16

@Hosta13

The panels are between concrete posts so they just slide in, if that makes sense. Meant it was easy to take the old ones out, but does also mean they can lift them as easily. Hopefully not once I get the wedges put in.

These (or similar) are what you need to stop people lifting your fence panels out. Wedges you hammer in may come loose in high winds, but these are screwed to each panel so will be fixed for ever.

www.amazon.co.uk/Woodside-Fence-Panel-Security-Brackets/dp/B07YG2R23S?tag=mumsnetforu03-21. £8 for a pack of 10. One on each side of the panel will be sufficient.
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Hosta13 · 19/03/2022 18:18

I didn't throw them back because I'd already thrown 4 (which as far as I was aware was all of them) over not half an hour earlier so wasn't going to rush out again plus I was actually indoors in the bath when I heard the conversation - they speak loudly and my windows are open.

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MichelleScarn · 19/03/2022 18:19

Do you have any roses that would need some lovely manure along the fence?

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ManateeFair · 19/03/2022 18:23

My neighbour sometimes slides the fence panel up for the kids to retrieve a ball and it really doesn’t bother me. It takes two seconds for them to grab a ball and wriggle back through the gap and it’s better than me having to go out and throw balls back or them knocking at the door and asking.

But equally I can see that if your relationship with your neighbours is a fractious one or you’ve had bad experiences with them not respecting your property in the past, it probably feels a lot more intrusive. (My neighbours are really chaotic and we’re not friends with them, but they’re not bad people and I know they wouldn’t do any damage or poke around.)

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ChardonnaysPetDragon · 19/03/2022 18:24

Please don't puncture the balls. It's not going to anything good, it will only escalate.

Talk to them, tell them you will be returning the balls in your own time and ask them to respect your privacy.

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