To think nursery shouldn’t be organising a Mother’s Day lunch?

[Chocolateatweekends]

It’s during the day midweek which is when a lot of mums will be at work. Feeling a bit rubbish I won’t be able to be there. I know my 15 month old won’t know, but I still feel sad

They're a nursery. Their whole purpose is to be open when parents are at work. How could they organise it for any other time?

Their whole purpose is to be open when parents are at work

Exactly …

It’s during the day midweek

When else could they have it? They open during working hours because that’s when people need them.

Personally, I’m always pleased that the nursery do stuff to try to add variety to what could be an extremely samey experience. It’s not a real Mother’s Day lunch. It’s just a way of using the event to do something fun with the kids.

My son’s nursery used to do Father’s Day breakfast at 8.15 am but a Mother’s Day tea at 3pm. The last year they’d changed it to both breakfasts - I assume some pointed out how odd it was. Anyway, not sure that anecdote helps really sorry but you could suggest a breakfast maybe?

I don't mean to sound harsh but this will happen time and time again as your child grows. School plays, sports days, parent lunches. Some of them you might be able to book time off work for, some you might not. It can be tough but that's just the way it is. The alternative is nursery/school never putting things like that on which doesn't seem a better option to me.

@Chocolateatweekends

Their whole purpose is to be open when parents are at work

Exactly …

But not everyone works while their child is at nursery, and some people can take time off/work flexibly. Our nursery isn’t doing Mother’s Day, but now covid restrictions have gone they’ve said that they will start to do more of the things they used to that allowed parents to come in. I’m quite glad, DD has been there nearly 2 years and I’ve only been inside a couple of times.

Are mothers actually expected to come or is it like our nursery’s recent events which as pp said are just tie-ins to the calendar to shake things up?

Send a grandparent

YANBU. I suggested doing the end of the day to our nursery, but they're sticking with their original time of 2.30. I'm going to have to ask MIL to go instead of me so DD has someone there. It makes me feel terrible that I don't get to go.

I think the whole point is that I don’t think it’s necessarily a good thing to be doing. Children who aren’t in nursery that day aren’t going to be coming in specially. The children who are coming in are either the children who have working parents or possibly if they have a SAHP / mum on maternity leave with a younger one. The latter may have a Mum able to come but everyone else will be either unable to come or have to adjust things at work.

@GnomeyGnome I know but at that age my child will at least be verbal and have some understanding of why I can’t be there, at this age he doesn’t.

Having the event is lovely.

Having it thoughtlessly, in the middle of the day, where is is likely to be most disruptive to their paying clients is just wrong.

The breakfast, or a late afternoon tea, seem far better ideas.

Agree that it just gets worse at school.

We aren’t expected but we are invited.

The breakfast thing is a good idea.

Thing is most people aren't sending their 18mos to full time nursery when they don't work - school nursery may have more SAHPs able to come along for these but private nursery for toddlers is surely more for childcare for work?

But plenty of mums will be able to take some time off?

This is life when yiu4 kids are in childcare or school. Is much more difficult for working parents. As a working parent, I had to send mum to a few events. But usually it was booked time off.

The kids love these things and most people can work round them to some degree.

Nurseries and schools have to try and include and engage with families - events like this are a good way of doing it. I appreciate it's difficult when you can't go (I work in a school so it is pretty much impossible for me to get time off for anything during the school day), but what's the alternative? They don't do anything for parents because some can't make it?
It's ok to feel disappointed that you can't go, but I don't think it's reasonable to suggest they shouldn't do it at all.

You’re going to need to get over this view before school. Everything at primary school is during the working day. We had two things on one day last week. Madness.

@Wnkingawalrus

You’re going to need to get over this view before school. Everything at primary school is during the working day. We had two things on one day last week. Madness.

I’ve already replied to this point.

Nursery are shooting themselves in the foot here as a bunch if 18mo aren't going to understand their Mums dropping in for an hour in the middle of the day theb leaving to go back to work - cue lots of confused crying babies.

That’s really odd to do it in the middle of the day. They are childcare, not the same as school at all.

I think the concept is a bit odd in the first place, but if they want to do something the obvious would be to have a flexible drop in at the beginning or end of the day.

I don't really see the point for babies that young tbh. They aren't going to understand it and having parents come in and leave again is just confusing for them. I think I'd rather not go anyway!

Some people will be able to make it. Don't be so bitter just because you can't on this occasion. As a PP said, it's nice that they bother to vary the routine and keep things dynamic.

Ours is doing it 7.30am-9am every day. I can’t attend as am at work for 7.45, my friends kid goes to same nursery I’ve asked her to sit by my DD.

It’s really a non issue OP

They approach it in the same way at my sons nursery. Afternoon tea for mum and a grab and go breakfast bag for dads, like, you know mums don’t work! It’s ridiculous that you have to take time off to go as a mum. I’ve fed back and I look forward to seeing what happens this year as it’s massively frustrating!