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Original poster

Partner got someone else pregnant

216 replies

soontobe3244 · 06/02/2022 20:13

I don't know what to do partner got someone else pregnant kept it from me only found out when we had a argument drunk says he wants to be with me and loves me but I carnt take him back now how would I ever forgive him?

OP posts:
LoisLane66 · 06/02/2022 22:01

@AssemblySquare
Nor me...but reading the threads on MN for the past few years has been a real eye opener for me.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 06/02/2022 22:05

Why would you even want to be with him?

acatcalledjohn · 06/02/2022 22:08

@soontobe3244

He says he dosent want anything to do with the child and already told her this

If his cheating wasn't enough of a turn off, his refusal to step up and support the child is awful. Happy to double dip but not willing to deal with the repercussions.

He's no man.

MintJulia · 06/02/2022 22:13

'he doesn't want anything to do with the child'. Wow, he just gets nicer and nicer.

Perhaps you could point out that his brainless, drunken, wick-dipping has produced a living, breathing, feeling child who will forever hurt because of having no dad worth the name.

Before you finally give him the heaveho, could you persuade him to have the snip, so no other poor kid is lumbered with such a scumbag as a father.

mathanxiety · 06/02/2022 22:14

Cheating is one thing, getting someone pregnant is in another league altogether, but turning his back on his own baby is something I could not get past.

What sort of a sorry excuse for a human being is this so called man?

I could not forgive him for any of it.

username1293948 · 06/02/2022 22:16

@soontobe3244

He says he dosent want anything to do with the child and already told her this
🤮🤮🤮
Kuachui · 06/02/2022 22:16

id be even less likely to want to be with him knowing hes going to do that to an innocent child. What a great man 👍👍👍

BeefSupreme · 06/02/2022 22:19

OP, why do you want to make it work with him?

Cherryblossoms85 · 06/02/2022 22:19

Happened to me. Maybe a bit different if on a break but would still never stay. I didn't stay and don't regret it at all.

ddl1 · 06/02/2022 22:21

It would be difficult enough to deal with his cheating on you and getting another woman pregnant. But his concealing it from you, and then telling you during an argument; and most of all his abandonment of his own child; are IMO unforgivable. Dump his conscienceless arse!

caringcarer · 06/02/2022 22:21

He is not trustworthy. Nobody's penis just happens to fall into a vagina with no condom on.

Bexy1111 · 06/02/2022 22:22

Leave him, level up (get fit, get hot, etc.) And find someone else.

Fairylightsongs · 06/02/2022 22:26

Couldn’t stomach the sight of a man who wouldn’t want anything to do with his own child. Absolutely and utterly nauseating. Scum of the earth.

Oh and the reason he’s not saying if it was a one night stand is becayse it was an affair and he knows you are going to find out.

VodselForDinner · 06/02/2022 22:27

@Bexy1111

Leave him, level up (get fit, get hot, etc.) And find someone else.
Oh for fuck sake.

Talk about kicking a woman when she’s down.

He didn’t do this because the OP isn’t fit or thin enough. She doesn’t have to change a single thing about herself. He’s a pig.

I hate shit advice like that. It’s tailored to make women think that if only they were attractive or slim enough, they’d have held onto a man.

It’s bullshit and if that’s really how you think, you have a very odd way of looking at life.

CJsGoldfish · 06/02/2022 22:29

He says he dosent want anything to do with the child and already told her this
Do you not see anything wrong with this? What about this attitude tells you he's worth your time? He's stupid enough to have unprotected sex but not man enough to accept the consequences. What a fucking loser.
Raise your bar OP.

Sprucewillis · 06/02/2022 22:34

Do yourself a favour and get him out. Don't put up with men who lie about something as fundamental as this. You will never know if it was more than a one night stand. You will never know if he's with you because this didn't work out. You are worth more than this. You will never know if he's been chatting to her all this time or how often. Don't put yourself through this. You've split before. You were arguing and he threw this in your face. He sounds like a prince of a man. And get tested! You are worth more.

RainbowZebraWarrior · 06/02/2022 22:36

@Bexy1111

Leave him, level up (get fit, get hot, etc.) And find someone else.
Get fit / get hot is not a helpful recommendation.

You are basically buying into misogyny. As is your advice to 'level up' that makes you sound like a Tory MP

Forgothowmuchlhatehomeschoolin · 06/02/2022 22:55

What a shitbag.

boobot1 · 06/02/2022 23:01

@soontobe3244

He says he dosent want anything to do with the child and already told her this
Its a hard no from me. Then to abandon the child too and run away from his responsibilities. Hes a true gemHmm
Tsuni · 06/02/2022 23:04

@Bexy1111

Leave him, level up (get fit, get hot, etc.) And find someone else.
Finding someone else isn't a priority. Looking after herself and her children is the priority. OPs partner didn't impregnate another woman because OP doesn't exercise enough. He did it because he's a scumbag. What a strange comment.
BritInAus · 06/02/2022 23:11

@soontobe3244

He says he dosent want anything to do with the child and already told her this
If the cheating isn't enough - what about this? Not sure I could stay with someone who could biologically have a child but 'want nothing to do with it'.
PrinnyPree · 06/02/2022 23:22

He has got someone else pregnant and you have drunken arguments (since thats how you found out). Both of these are not a healthy foundation for a relationship going forward. There is no fixing this, find better for yourself. Flowers

PrincessNutella · 06/02/2022 23:36

I would not try to get back together. Get out now--it's too much of a mess.

MrsDukeOfHastings · 06/02/2022 23:54

This exact thing happened to me, in a relationship for 8 years, had one child together. He cheated and got another woman pregnant.
In my case she didn't keep the baby and there were numerous issues in our relationship but I could never get past it. It was the straw that broke the camels back and I still feel sick when I get flashbacks.
I think its a very hard betrayal to forgive and as others have said, why would you want to, he has cheated on you, created another life, lied about it for months and won't even give you the details you're asking for. Honestly nor worth it.

Lovingeveryrainbow · 07/02/2022 00:02

Any woman who stays with a man who abandons his child is wrong. I think you know that. This man is willing to leave his child high and dry - his own flesh and blood. How could he possibly be loyal to anyone else? He’s already shown you that he doesn’t prioritise your feelings, nor your health apparently as he thinks it appropriate to have unprotected sex with other women.

Don’t get caught up in his shit. And fgs please don’t consider having a baby with him