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Original poster

Partner got someone else pregnant

216 replies

soontobe3244 · 06/02/2022 20:13

I don't know what to do partner got someone else pregnant kept it from me only found out when we had a argument drunk says he wants to be with me and loves me but I carnt take him back now how would I ever forgive him?

OP posts:
peridito · 06/02/2022 20:56

Only you and your partner will know if you can carry on .If you ask on MN everyone will say "bin him" .
Because life is black and white with no shades of grey .Not .

NotaCoolMum · 06/02/2022 20:58

@soontobe3244

He says he dosent want anything to do with the child and already told her this
Wow- he’s a great catch…🙄
Heytheredemons · 06/02/2022 21:00

@soontobe3244

He says he dosent want anything to do with the child and already told her this
It's a no from me before you made this comment, but to abandon one of his children is just disgusting. The least he could do is to be a man and raise his child and support the mother. If you were "on a break," she's been led a merry dance also and been left by a waste of space to go through pregnancy and birth on her own. What a great prize he is.
Darbs76 · 06/02/2022 21:01

He asked you to stop going on about it? Wow. And I’d be telling him he’s paying for that child even if he doesn’t want anything to do with that innocent child. Not sure if that’s meant to make thou feel better than he’s planning to ignore this poor child like it didn’t happen. Do not take this man back, he clearly has so little respect for you he can’t even tell you the truth. That’s a line in the sand, no going back

MrsWinters · 06/02/2022 21:03

It’s not only that he got someone pregnant, he also used that information as a weapon. What a prick

lightisnotwhite · 06/02/2022 21:05

Honestly you’d “get by” a lot better without him. Any money would be yours and your children. Not split with him buying drinks for some other woman.
The pregnancy is not the issue as that’s as much luck as anything. The point is he had unprotected sex with someone whilst in a relationship with you. That’s just rude.

It’s really not that tricky on your own. Even if you mess up theres no ones watching. It’s fine, it’s easier than living with a moron.

Hesma · 06/02/2022 21:05

So he cheated on you, got someone else pregnant and is abandoning his child… sounds like a right piece of work 🙄

MrJollyLivesNextDoor · 06/02/2022 21:05

Well if you've kicked him out, good

You don't need answers that he won't give you - stop asking him for them.

You just need him to stay the fuck away from you

owlinnahat · 06/02/2022 21:08

He says he dosent want anything to do with the child and already told her this

Well, he is going to have to pay child maintenance, at the very least. He also doesn't entirely have control over whether or not this child is in his life - what about if his parents want a relationship with their grandchild? And your DC have a right, in due course, to know they have a sibling who they may or may not want a relationship with.

He can be a twat about it but he can't pretend this child doesn't exist.

CornishTiger · 06/02/2022 21:08

On a break.

Doesn’t use a condom.

Doesn’t want anything to do with child.

He’s a honourable man and such a catch.

insideoutsider · 06/02/2022 21:08

But they were on a break!

On a more serious note, he needs to be in the child's life for one...
I could never continue a relationship with him.

Userno263647284 · 06/02/2022 21:11

I know someone who's boyfriend cheated and got another girl pregnant. Somehow she did managed to forgive him (I do think they had a short break up though). They are still together now many years later and do a fab job both with the daughter he had with the other woman and their own kids. Shes a fab stepmother to the girl. It can't be east though, I admire her.

But for me, I don't think I could forgive.

AssemblySquare · 06/02/2022 21:12

For me the issue is that the OW will always be in your life - that’s the bit I couldn’t cope with!

Fatarseflanagan09 · 06/02/2022 21:12

He says he doesn’t want anything to do with the child, well there’s your answer right there, he should have thought about that when he dropped his pants, I bet he told her he was single as well, next she’ll be a slag and it was her fault and she made him do it, he’s a cheat and a liar and he got caught, I wouldn’t want him round me or my children because it won’t be the first time.

unsalted · 06/02/2022 21:15

I'm sorry OP, but you can do better.

CafeConLechePorFavor · 06/02/2022 21:17

🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️

AcrossthePond55 · 06/02/2022 21:18

@soontobe3244

He says he dosent want anything to do with the child and already told her this
This would be the primary reason I'd end the relationship. If he'd do it to her child, he'll do it to yours.
Notwithittoday · 06/02/2022 21:19

Just be grateful if you don’t have kids and move gracefully on

LoisLane66 · 06/02/2022 21:19

Only you can decide. We can't do that for you as we don't know the full story.
It's a big decision but people have done worse and got past it. It just depends on your feelings for him.
What I might do is not what some others might do depending on your attachment to the 'sinner'.

Mo1911 · 06/02/2022 21:19

It can be done if you really want to and he really and truly accepts where he went wrong and regains your trust. It's not the child's fault so they should have contact with both parents and stepparents. There's a lot for you to think about it, but if you both want to be together enough, then there will be a way through it.

DrSbaitso · 06/02/2022 21:21

@soontobe3244

He says he dosent want anything to do with the child and already told her this
He gets better and better. If you wouldn't dump him for getting someone else pregnant, dump him for being a completely worthless human.
UserBot9to5 · 06/02/2022 21:21

What a prince 😲

Ginger1982 · 06/02/2022 21:22

@Notwithittoday

Just be grateful if you don’t have kids and move gracefully on
They've got two kids.
MadeinSW3 · 06/02/2022 21:22

He says he dosent want anything to do with the child and already told her this

That is disgusting. It’s not the child’s fault he is an irresponsible prick.

LoisLane66 · 06/02/2022 21:23

@AssemblySquare
Many posters on MN have an OW in their life, like it or not, they're there and you deal with it or leave.