Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 ··· 10 11 12 13 14 15

Original poster

DH gave his female coworker a lift home past midnight

364 replies

Hexagonmum · 05/02/2022 22:49

So my husband went to a works drink after work on Friday, around midnight he messaged me asking if he should get us a McDonald's, replied back saying in bed but yeah why not.
A few mins later I had no response back from him whether he was going to get McDonald's or not so I called him and I could tell he was in the car when he answered. I mentioned get the takeaway and he said do I want fries and when I was about to respond I hear a female voice. He was giving one of his coworkers a lift home past midnight!
This I'm not going to lie really got my back up.
Am I reading too much into this???

OP posts:

TooBigForMyBoots · 07/02/2022 18:55

Great outcome @Hexagonmum. Enjoy your date nights.

mummyruby · 07/02/2022 18:58

Wouldn't bother me. Sounds like a nice thing to do.

Nixster87 · 07/02/2022 19:05

I would have been more angry if I’d known he’d left a colleague to get home alone when he was perfectly capable of giving her a lift before stopping for food. Are you on a car fuel shortage OP or do you just not trust your partner?

Cavementality · 07/02/2022 19:11

Was his car rapidly turning into a pumpkin?

Hmm1234 · 07/02/2022 19:15

YANBU if she’s decent looking and it was after ‘work drinks’ he is definitely trying it on and she should know better him being married and having to have an awkward conversation in HIS care with significant other about a takeaway. Happens in the office a lot

Jeannie88 · 07/02/2022 19:16

Oh my dad used to look after the young ladies and give them lift home. A gentleman, unless u have cause to fear please don't worry! X

RincewindsHat · 07/02/2022 19:22

Have not RTFT but assumed you'd be happy that you're married to a decent guy who's taking a woman home to ensure her safety rather than allowing her to be alone after midnight!

Watchamocauli · 07/02/2022 19:23

Unless your DH has any history with cheating. In your place, I would have want him to drop his female colleague home.

Don’t you see the news. even Women going for runs are unsafe

Fayelina · 07/02/2022 19:24

In the past I occasionally got lifts home from men I worked with as they didn’t want me walking alone. It was never anything more than them being kind and me accepting because I was grateful. Nothing untoward.

WanderlyWagonInWales · 07/02/2022 19:25

As you’ve figured out by now YABVU. You’ve got a good egg there OP. He was just being decent and seeing her home safely. Glad you managed to give your head a wobble and sort it out with your DH. Regular date nights sound like a fab plan for ye going forward. Enjoy! xx

SaySomethingMan · 07/02/2022 19:26

I’d have expected him to mention in passing, “I’m giving x a lift and will pick up the takeaway after that” kinda thing

Hearwego · 07/02/2022 19:37

It’s 2022, can’t men and women just be friends?!!
I’ve given work colleagues a lift home late at night, of the opposite sex.
One of my grandfathers had a close friend who was female, they were friends for many years, they met when he was working for the RAF back in the 50s.
They stayed in touch throughout there lives and both happily married with their own families.

ifonly4 · 07/02/2022 19:38

Unless you've got reason not to trust him, I really wouldn't worry.

My DH has given and had lifts off many females colleagues over the years. I have absolutely no reason to worry. He always seems happy to introduce me to them, asks if I want to go out with group unless it's strictly a works event and I often hear him or he tells me he's texted them saying something nice or jokey. He goes for coffee with ex male and female colleagues, again I trust him.

melj1213 · 07/02/2022 19:39

@SaySomethingMan

I’d have expected him to mention in passing, “I’m giving x a lift and will pick up the takeaway after that” kinda thing

Depends on the timeline ad to whether this was an option though ... if he was texting on the way out to the car he may have messaged the OP, intending to go to McDonald's anyway (the message to the OP was to see if she wanted something too before he got home with his Big Mac and she was upset he didn't ask if she wanted anything) so was going to check for a response once he got there, and as he was getting into the car he either saw his work colleague setting off to walk/waiting at the bus or taxi rank and offered her a lift which she accepted. They get in the car and set off, at which point the OP calls back as he has missed her response to his text while speaking to the colleague/already driving.

Equally, why should he have to justify doing someone a favour? If he was giving Chris from Accounts a lift home would he have to explain it first? Or is it just because its Jane from Admin and therefore, as a lone woman after midnight, she must have trapped him so she could have her wicked way with the good samaritan? I could understand if the person lived miles away and McDonald's was just around the corner so it would add an excessive amount of time to the trip home that he might say "Dropping a work mate home in X Town before McDonald's- will be home in about 40 mins xxx" but that would be so that the OP didn't worry that her partner had messaged to say he was coming home via McDonald's which should have taken 20 mins max, and 40 mins later he still isn't home.

Lovetoplan · 07/02/2022 19:52

I would say go with your gut feel on this - if you are uncomfortable there is a reason.....

Daphodils · 07/02/2022 19:58

@Lovetoplan

I would say go with your gut feel on this - if you are uncomfortable there is a reason.....

And that reason could be paranoid delusions. "Go with your gut" is some of the worst advice given out on here! (And it's never given to women who think their partner is nice.)

TheFormidableMrsC · 07/02/2022 19:59

@Lovetoplan

I would say go with your gut feel on this - if you are uncomfortable there is a reason.....

Might be.better to read OP's updates. All is well!

BABAHOTEL · 07/02/2022 20:00

@Lovetoplan

I would say go with your gut feel on this - if you are uncomfortable there is a reason.....

Only the OP now admits she's UR!

So the "spidey senses" can be called off !

Lorieandrews · 07/02/2022 20:30

@WhatEvenHappened44

Sounds like a nice man OP? ... unless he was drink driving ofc. What exactly are you worried about?

And texting whilst he was driving

He sounds like a dream. Lols.

AgathaX · 07/02/2022 20:49

Good result. Enjoy your date nights.

MadameFantabulosa · 07/02/2022 20:57

You are ridiculous. He was being kind.

catfunk · 07/02/2022 20:59

Assuming you could manage to drive a male colleague home without noshing them off.....

Mogwig · 07/02/2022 20:59

I guess you thought eg she was giving him a blowjob in the car?

Maybe. Impossible to know.

It all depends on what the female co-worker is like.

Fluffmum · 07/02/2022 20:59

If he’s a cheater we’ll yes but if not he’s being a good work colleague

Dguu6u · 07/02/2022 21:03

Why the hell would you get a McDonald’s at midnight when you’re already in bed. It’s disgusting and extremely unhealthy.

Flip

1 2 ··· 10 11 12 13 14 15

Swipe left for the next trending thread