‘A walk’ for a first date - yes or no?

[Anon778833]

AIBU to think it’s lazy? In a way, I can see how walking around with someone can be a good way to get to know what they’re like but for a first date?

I’m trying to sift out the ones to avoid. Which I am never good at.

Probably would be my ideal first date, actually! Talking to someone while walking is often easier.

YABU!

A walk sounds good to me! How is it lazy?

No pressure to meet in a space that is a set time (eg. A multi course dinner date)
Opportunity to duck in to a cafe for a coffee if the date is going well
Outdoors so low risk of any sort of illness transmission
You can get some steps in
Nice relaxed informal chance to chat and get to know someone

Not sure if this is perhaps an age thing, but a lot of my friends do walks and coffees etc for first dates not rather than dinner / drinks.

My initial reaction was that it's a nice idea. You could walk around somewhere, have a chat, and then discuss possible places to get a drink or something to eat maybe. But it would depend upon the weather that particular day.

YABU.

It’s low effort and sounds perfect

I would think it's a good sign actually, that they're interested in getting to know you.

Thank you. I don’t mean physically lazy, I mean can’t be bothered to think of an actual date. I like walks so it’s not that I have a problem with the actual walk, rather I’m scoping out this person.

I think it sounds great - a walk and a coffee, easy to extend if you’re getting on, easy to cut short if you don’t. Nice and public so low risk of creepy behaviour, Covid-secure, and low pressure.

Non-threatening.
Pretty safe - both in terms of personal safety and Covid.
Easy to talk.
Can add in a coffee if all goes well but no obligation if not.
Cheap for both parties.
What's not to like?

I think it sounds like a good first date, if things go well you can always get a drink at the end of the walk.

can’t be bothered to think of an actual date

Thing is, if you're at the "sifting out" stage then it's not really a "date" as such it's still "getting to know you" isn't it?

Yabu. When I was on the dating scene a walk and a coffee was my go-to first date. It's great imo - low pressure, plenty around you to talk about if conversation is awkward, and if it goes well you can then suggest going for lunch etc.

Aw DH took me for a lush walk long the sea front on our second date. First date was a casual coffee so we don't really count it.

The walk was definitely the most memorable

I'd have been happy with that as a 1st date

"I mean can’t be bothered to think of an actual date"

Eh? It's no more effort to say "let's grab drinks" and pick a pub, compared to "let's go for a walk" and pick a location for a walk.

They're both actual dates.

If it’s in a nice place and there’s somewhere you could get a quick coffee if things go well nearby then I think it’s quite a nice date.

I think it sounds a good idea, you're not investing too much time and expense on someone you may not develop a connection with.

Safety-wise, it needs to be somewhere that you already know.

A walk and a coffee, somewhere with some stuff to look at. No pressure to get pissed or dance or akwardness about taxis. I like it. But I'm old and never want to date again.

In the days of dating during covid last couple of years I did a lot of walking dates! I would never have considered them before for the reasons you've mentioned.

Now things are more open, I would go back to my original thought process where I agree with you - it is a bit lazy and boring and means (to me) they don't want to spend any money. Not to mention cold!

So I'm not a huge fan - walking side by side so you can't look into their face and decide if you really fancy them or have a connection and I'm distracted by paying attention to where I'm walking (as I'm clumsy!) so it's not ideal for me.

I would maybe just say something like "Do you mind if we grab a coffee maybe instead?" if you're not keen.. I used to make a jokey comment about being a bit sick of going for a walk now (implying because that was all we could do for so many months)

If you're not keen then why don;t

What's not to like?

Probably that it's cheap for both parties.

You could always invite him out for a meal OP

Ideal date for me

I did this. Took my Tinder date on a walk around town on our first date. It became a bit of a thing for us. We feel it did wonders for our relationship, we really got to know each other on these strolls, chatting about all sorts of things. Whenever we want to be nostalgic, we go back to the same place and retrace the walks. Usually they ended up with a drink on a pub terrace or a quick bite somewhere. It was bliss.

I would not do this, however, in an area where there are few people, as you have to be careful with a stranger. We met the first few times in the afternoon, and walked on an often-used route, before I had established that he was 'safe'.

Almost 4 years together and currently pregnant of our baby.

It depends on where you live, e.g. it's much better in the summer months.

Say on a nice warm day, a couple of laps around a big public park with a decent pub or cafe nearby sounds pretty good for the reasons already covered by e.g. @galacticpixels.

I wouldn’t like a walk as a first date. It screams I don’t want to spend any money on you.

It’s my ideal date tbh, for all the reasons suggested upthread! Meet at a takeaway coffee place, wander around for a while, go for something to eat afterwards if the conversation’s flown.

I mean obviously don’t go anywhere secluded. I live in a city so a neighbourhood walk is pretty busy. Don’t go off into the Cairngorms or anything.

A meal would not be my idea of a good first date! Second maybe but I wouldn’t want to have to sit there with someone who I may not even be interested in.