To have my pyjamas on when MIL visits?

[ashorterday]

MIL is visiting this evening. Today I've been out walking, come home had a nice bath and put PJs on.

DH thinks I should get dressed, I'm willing to compromise with a hoody over the PJs but the spotty trousers will give it away.

Am I a slattern for even considering it? MIL is too polite to mention it.

I'm all for wearing comfy leisure wear when you're at home but to wear it when you have visitors does smack of not being bothered about them.
Wear comfy clothes by all means but to be wearing slob by pyjamas does smack of thinking that you couldn't give a fuck.

Even my elderly, disabled mum wouldn't receive visitors in her nightie, and nor would I.

@userxx

You need loungewear. Not as casual as Pyjamas but still super comfy.

Correct, but I've been searching online and everywhere seems to have sold out (I want some wide leg lounge trousers)

@2022success

Oh - and DIL is a size 6.

I don't understand why this is relevant?

Long as you have matching slippers or fluffy socks

I don’t sleep in pyjamas, but have loads of “lounge pants” that I wear at home. Right now I have charcoal jogger type things, Uggs, and a big pink jumper and would be more than happy for MIL to pop round. We’re at home, on a Sunday evening, and comfy.

She did, however, go through a spell of “popping in” uninvited during summer holidays in the mornings. I would be in my warm weather equivalent (joggers, tee, flip-flops) but not yet showered, and I felt really uncomfortable with that. So for me I think being “dressed” in slobby clothes with clean hair etc is fine, being caught not yet dressed is not.

What do you sleep in then?

A long t shirt, @Silverswirl

@ashorterday M&S have some in at the moment.

I think most of my family, friends, mil and DPs mates have seen me in my pj's at some point (usually in the morning, with dressing gown and scarecrow hair).

I really don't care, it's my house, my weekend and I will do what I want to be comfortable. I certainly wouldn't judge anyone who was in pj's, they are basically lounge wear any way, just with maybe more of a pattern or theme!

If I was your DH, I'd be embarrassed. In our house, we don't let visitors see us in our nightwear, unless they are staying over (and it's unavoidable).

@SliceOfCakeCupOfTea

Ah see to me pajamas say "I feel comfortable around you"

Whereas I don’t feel I have to convey how comfortable I am around someone by changing into my nightwear. The fact I want to spend time with them shows them I feel comfortable around them.

This thread is so odd. You’re in your own home with your MIL-family.

It’s absolutely fine to be in your pjs especially as she is a frequent visitor.

I wouldn’t put pyjamas on if I knew someone was coming round. I think it’s odd and implies you don’t want to host them.

@TolkiensFallow

I wouldn’t put pyjamas on if I knew someone was coming round. I think it’s odd and implies you don’t want to host them.

It depends whether you think of your MIL as somebody you host or somebody who spends time in your house as a member of the family, and whether you think it’s normal to wear pyjamas in front of family members.

People just have different ways of doing things.

@TolkiensFallow

I wouldn’t put pyjamas on if I knew someone was coming round. I think it’s odd and implies you don’t want to host them.

But you don’t host or entertain family - they don’t need you to be waiting on them. They muck in with everyone else. Put the kettle on, change DC’s nappies, load the dishwasher etc. it’s not formal if family visit.

@TolkiensFallow

I wouldn’t put pyjamas on if I knew someone was coming round. I think it’s odd and implies you don’t want to host them.

Hosting a party or a meal is one thing, a weekly visit from a family member just isn't the same. It's relaxed and comfortable, no standing on ceremony necessary.

Wouldn't bother me but I take my son to work in my pjs somedays as early start , I just chuck coat on
People say what if you break down? Well whAt if i do , im not out in a slinky lace number im fully covered so why does it matter and I am not trying to
Impress anyone

I don't sleep in pjs as I sleep in knickers and a vest, so I use them as loungewear and wear underwear underneath

@crazyjinglist but why is pjs a problem ?your fully covered as long as they don't have yesterdays breakfast
And yes my nan did have a bath and put on her nightclothes and dressing gown and my mum does too
I go out and put the recycling out in my pjs so my neighbours have seen me in them , why do i care what they think
If i have been watching kids play rugby and its wet and cold i will bath and put ob pjs rather than dirtying more clothes and that will be around 5 pm if someone comes over im in my pjs , they obviously don't have to visit if that offends them

I do wonder what kind of nightwear some of you have that is so bad to be seem in
My pjs sets are nice matching sets not little see thru nighties or grey holy pjs , but then people who visit us are close friends and family all people that would put the kettle on, help themselves etc
Plus I suffered with MH for a bit so they seen me at my worst and I wore pjs regularly 24/7 then and i had people around me who didn't judge
Some of my pjs are nicer than my clothes

Re the washing thing - what's the difference between putting on clean PJs and clean clothes ? If your PJs are daywear rather than nightwear, why would they create any less washing than wearing clothes would? In fact, if you're not wearing knickers under them (because they're PJs), then surely they're going to create more washing than chucking on (say) a pair of jeans after your bath, when all you'll have to wash afterwards is the pants you had on underneath?

@Warmduscher well what is that Makes someone feel uncomfortable someone is in pjs rather than clothes
Pjs that cover up more than many clothes why is it an issue what someone else has got on, surely you have gone to see the person not judge them on there attire

@greatestsnowonearth if i put mine on at 5 pm im going to wear them to bed
If i put jeans on im still going to put pjs on
If i get late and say sit in pjs and then bath and put on clean pjs im going go to bed in them too
Therefore 2 x phs to wash , rather than 2 pjs and 1 set of clothes
I may spill something on jeans or t shirt and i don't find jeans the most comfortable to sit in and if i put leggings on i would wash them of i had them on a couple of hrs

@PrincessPaws

I don't sleep in pjs as I sleep in knickers and a vest, so I use them as loungewear and wear underwear underneath

Same here. Maybe it's the wording then. Maybe if we just referred to our 'pjs' as 'lounge wear' people wouldn't be as bothered?

Fwiw my family (in-laws included) have seen me in all kinds of states over the years when I've been at low points, so seeing me in my pjs while we have a cuppa and a chat is neither here nor there.

@greatestsnowonearth also there is no rule that you can't wear knickers under pjs

what is it about wearing clothes and not nightwear that makes people feel they can’t relax? Do people genuinely feel tense unless they’re wearing their nightwear?

THIS