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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want the £10?

214 replies

Cardio101 · 01/01/2022 14:15

Advertised an old big unit on Facebook market place for £10, very clear it’s £10 on the post.
Arranged for someone to collect it when I was at work but DH at home.
Person arrives and tells DH that it’s free, he says ‘oh is it? Are you sure?’, and she said it was definitely advertised as free so he let her take it.

It was old, and slightly damaged, but something that could easily be painted over/done up.

AIBU to be pissed off she didn’t pay when it was clearly advertised in the post as £10 and she lied to my husband?
It’s only £10, it doesn’t make a difference to my life at all, it’s more the principle!

I did actually message her after and explain it clearly said £10 in the post but of course she hasn’t replied!

OP posts:
LynetteScavo · 01/01/2022 14:36

No way is is the is it the DHs fault! The woman is a thief. That is annoying and disappointing.

LynetteScavo · 01/01/2022 14:36

The posters saying it was the DHs fault would probably pull a stunt like this.

HoardingSamphireSaurus · 01/01/2022 14:37

Facebook shame her.

We have a woman here who does similar. She has a range of ploys, from lying about various life limiting illnesses to picking up and running.

There is a post most moths about her latest scam. People are slowly getting her measure and those posts are turning into "X is still at it" posts.

People like that don't need anyone to feel sorry for them. They are scammers. Cheap scammers but scammers nonetheless.

girlmom21 · 01/01/2022 14:37

@LynetteScavo

The posters saying it was the DHs fault would probably pull a stunt like this.
What a ridiculous thing to say
HoardingSamphireSaurus · 01/01/2022 14:43

Why? If you can't see that the woman did anything wrong then her behaviour bis something you are comfortable with, might try, on the offchance.

girlmom21 · 01/01/2022 14:45

@HoardingSamphireSaurus

Why? If you can't see that the woman did anything wrong then her behaviour bis something you are comfortable with, might try, on the offchance.
I've said it's his fault that OP's out of pocket but the woman's fault that she lied.

I've never try anything like this because I'm not an absolute tosser (contrary to common belief Grin)

Aderyn21 · 01/01/2022 14:48

The husband's only mistake was in trusting the woman's honesty - she is solely to blame for being a liar and a thief.
Publicly name and shame.

nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 01/01/2022 14:50

I'd name and shame her as a thief/scammer on the group.

Xmasiscancelledagain · 01/01/2022 14:50

You should have told your DH how much you wanted for it.

Original poster
Cardio101 · 01/01/2022 14:51

@Xmasiscancelledagain

You should have told your DH how much you wanted for it.
If you read my posts you’ll see that I did exactly that
OP posts:
LynetteScavo · 01/01/2022 14:52

@girlmom21 - why is it a ridiculous thing to say?

The woman lied, the DH trusted her because he didn't expect her to be a lying thief.

The husband was the victim here.

I'm sitting here with my window open - if someone reaches in and steals the fairy off my Christmas tree is it my fault for having my window open?

It's FB market place that makes you realise people who you would otherwise think were trustworthy are actually lying thieves.

HippeePrincess · 01/01/2022 14:52

DH is coming across as a bit of a dimwit but the woman is a lying thief. I’d blame the DH for falling for it though.

BoopTheFloof · 01/01/2022 14:52

She told a deliberate lie.

Pegasussnail · 01/01/2022 14:54

I would report her to the organiser of the group and on the group. She was very dishonest.

girlmom21 · 01/01/2022 14:55

@LynetteScavo your comparison is absurd. it's nothing like the same.

If someone knocked on your door and said "your husband said I could have the angel on your tree for free" what would you do? Would you just assume they must be telling the truth?

LynetteScavo · 01/01/2022 14:55

And as the OP said it's not about the money. I once sold something of DDs on FB - I would have usually just given it to charity but DD was trying to save for something and I'd suggested she could sell somethings she already had. Someone I would have presumed quite respectable collected from the doorstep but didn't leave any money. When I messaged and pointed out the money was for DD they did come back with the money - but said she didn't think I would actually want the money. Confused

SiliconHeaven · 01/01/2022 14:56

People saying it is the DH’s fault are the ones who don’t understand the consequences of victim blaming.
Mugged? Your own fault for walking alone at night.
Bullied? Your fault for being fat.
I once had bad food poisoning and my boss told me it was my own fault for eating at McDonald’s

ReformedWaywardTeen · 01/01/2022 14:58

Not only would I make and shame her (even with her blocking you can still see the message thread), you can report to Facebook and I would log with the police as well as she has received goods or services via deception. You can prove the advert with the price.

I say this as we had a woman who not only underpaid for an item, she then rang, text, and messaged me online about the item she only partly paid for saying it was broken, how she was going to put my windows through, how she was going to shame me online. You name it it was hours of threats and harassment. The silly cow had bought a pole tent from me, and because she was clearly hard of thinking she thought the poles were broken- clearly had never seen a pole tent before.
In the end, out desperation and sick of threats from her and then her husband, all stupidly in writing and left on voicemail, I called 101.
I wasn't sure they would do anything other than tell me to block her. Instead, they asked for her name.
They called back about twenty minutes later, they knew her and she had form for buying items then threatening people to get money back via bank transfer. Real nasty scammer.
They contacted her, said they had more than enough proof to charge her, and funnily enough the harassment stopped.

So yes, definitely contact them, I bet she's a known thief.

Cheeseandlobster · 01/01/2022 14:58

She is a thief. Email the mods of the group and explain what happened. Attach screenshots and hopefully she will be banned so she can't fleece someone else

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 01/01/2022 14:58

She's a cheeky fucker, but you'll never see any money from her.

Your DH should have checked with you before letting her just take it, though!

zingally · 01/01/2022 14:59

She's a CF (I'd name and shame on FB!), but also your husband is a dopey twit!

But at the end of the day... it's a tenner, and that CF will get her karma back at some point.

gettingolderandgrumpy · 01/01/2022 15:09

I’d laugh at the cf cheek the blatant lie for £10 . Yes your dh is a twit sort of thing my dh would do believe some cf stranger over me . Nothing you can do chalk it up as experience to make sure if you sell anything again don’t let your dh be in .

Bananarama21 · 01/01/2022 15:18

Are you sure it didn't say free under the advertisement? I seen it many times on Facebook market place where the item has been incorrectly advertised as free then the price in the description.

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 01/01/2022 15:27

Didn't take long to blame the husband did it ? Hmm

If I posted something like "My DH put an old computer keyboard on FB for £10 , buyer came round when he was at work as arranged . Told me it was free and I thought "Meh, it's a scabby old keyboard just clutering up , why not"

The replies would've been
"Well if your DH wanted to sell it he shoud've made sure he was there , not fob it off onto you while he's at work"

LynetteScavo · 01/01/2022 15:29

@girlmom21 If someone knocked on the door and used my name, and said I'd they'd come for the fairy off the tree of course he'd give it to them. If they just asked for the fairy with no back story he'd probably be a bit bemused and question them.

I totally agree with @SiliconHeaven. It's surprising how many people think victim blaming is OK.