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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Friend's DS might be prosecuted for dangerous driving

250 replies

walnutroaster · 30/12/2021 20:41

Hi I've name changed for this as I don't want my other posts linked to this. My very close friends DS who is in his early 20's was recently involved in a car accident, he is fine and the passenger in the other car suffered minor injuries but are ok.

Friends DS caused the accident as he decided to overtake a bus which was going quite slow, when he over took the bus the other side was clear but when he was overtaking the bus a car came in the other direction and unfortunately he didn't have enough time to get around the bus and he crashed head on in to the car. Her DS is obviously at fault and I'm not trying to excuse what he did. Friends DS said this was the first time driving in nearly 5 years that he has overtaken anything over than a cyclist.

Friend insisted her DS made a genuine mistake and is the first mistake he has made driving, I know I might sound like I am excusing the DS but he is such a lovely and well behaved young man so I genuinely believe he made a one off mistake which he will never make aging. Her DS has said he will never overtake a vehicle again, I don't believe he is a threat to other road users.

Friends DS is scared he is going to get prosecuted for dangerous driving, my DH seems to think he should be charged as he could have killed someone and I need to stop having such a soft spot for him. I said to DH I don't think he deserves a driving ban as he made one genuine mistake which he won't do again but DH seems to think if the DS does not get banned it makes a mockery of the legal system.

AIBU to lenient on my friends DS?

OP posts:
EishetChayil · 30/12/2021 20:42

Of course he should be charged. He could have killed someone.

NynaeveSedai · 30/12/2021 20:42

Well whatever happens to him isn't up to any of you so I'm not sure why your opinions matter much. He's bloody lucky nobody died and I'm sure he's Learnt his lesson but he will still face the consequences.

Hellocatshome · 30/12/2021 20:42

Its unlikely he will be banned if this is a first offence, he may get some points/a fine. Have the police ecen indicated they are prosecuting? They dont always.

traka · 30/12/2021 20:46

It's got nothing to do with you!

ThirdElephant · 30/12/2021 20:47

@traka

It's got nothing to do with you!
This. It's not within your power to 'be lenient' or otherwise.
BathTangle · 30/12/2021 20:48

I would have thought he might be charged with Careless Driving.
You can use this guidance to see where the offence might fit and what the likely outcome might be (IANAL): www.sentencingcouncil.org.uk/offences/magistrates-court/item/careless-driving-drive-without-due-care-and-attention-revised-2017/

BurscoughBooths · 30/12/2021 20:49

@Hellocatshome

Its unlikely he will be banned if this is a first offence, he may get some points/a fine. Have the police ecen indicated they are prosecuting? They dont always.
If he is convicted of dangerous driving, he will be banned whether it’s his first offence or not. 12 months minimum + an extended retest at the end of it
DismantledKing · 30/12/2021 20:50

You’re massively overinvested. He deserves what’s coming to him.

MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry · 30/12/2021 20:50

AIBU to lenient on my friends DS?

Eh? Confused

What difference does your opinion make? He’ll either be prosecuted or he won’t. He drove dangerously. Nice lad or not, it doesn’t make it any less dangerous.

Hellocatshome · 30/12/2021 20:50

If he is convicted of dangerous driving, he will be banned whether it’s his first offence or not. 12 months minimum + an extended retest at the end of it

Yes sorry I was thinking of Driving without due care and attention not dangerous driving.

Yarnivore · 30/12/2021 20:53

If he does get convicted of dangerous driving (and it does sound like it meets the threshold) it will be at least a 12 month ban, and potentially points, fine and even the possibility of a custodial sentence.

It is though quite ok to support him and your friend while condoning what he did. You all need to support him to take responsibility and not minimise his reckless behaviour. It's hopefully a lesson he wont forget and is bloody lucky nobody was seriously injured or worse.

Yarnivore · 30/12/2021 20:54

Aarrgh, not condoning what he did

GrendelsGrandma · 30/12/2021 20:55

Your description doesn't make sense, he didn't carry out correct observations, if the road was clear he wouldn't have crashed into another car headfirst. He was careless and could have killed someone.

I don't care if he is a nice boy. If the police have evidence and he's charged and convicted, he deserves what's coming to him. Personally I think the driving age should be raised, young men are the most likely to crash.

MichelleScarn · 30/12/2021 20:55

when he over took the bus the other side was clear but when he was overtaking the bus a car came in the other direction and unfortunately he didn't have enough time to get around the bus and he crashed head on in to the car.
Well it wasn't clear was it.

MadMadMadamMim · 30/12/2021 20:55

he decided to overtake a bus which was going quite slow, when he over took the bus the other side was clear but when he was overtaking the bus a car came in the other direction and unfortunately he didn't have enough time to get around the bus and he crashed head on in to the car.

If you ignore all this waffle and if you take all the emotion away about what a lovely and well behaved young man he is, he was driving on the wrong side of the road (in a built up area?) and hit another car head on.

That's dangerous. I mean, you don't overtake anything unless you can see the road is clear and it is safe to overtake.

onedayoranother · 30/12/2021 20:55

People generally make mistakes when accidents happen, it's not always due to speeding or drunk driving or whatever. He used poor judgment though - he didn't have time to pass the bus before another car came which caused an accident. He is at fault.

Cas112 · 30/12/2021 20:57

Are you sentencing him 🤔 let the court do its job and you stop getting involved

YoBeaches · 30/12/2021 20:57

Mistake or not - he made the wrong call and caused an accident as a result. He has had the same training and exams as anyone else on the roads, who make better decisions and don't cause accidents.

The laws are there to protect people, and if needs be to take people of the road if they have proven themselves incapable of being a safe driver.

And let's be clear, it wasn't a small accident, it was a head on collision because he was driving on the wrong side of the road into oncoming traffic.

Iwant2move · 30/12/2021 20:58

My husband was killed when a car overtook him.

TooWicked · 30/12/2021 20:59

If he’s a dangerous driver he should be charged, and he should not be on the road.

He made a dangerous decision that luckily didn’t result in someone’s death. It really doesn’t matter what a lovely young man he is Confused

Original poster
walnutroaster · 30/12/2021 20:59

Sorry if it wasn't clear I should have worded it better but when the DS decided to overtake the bus the over side of the road was clear no car coming however the DS underestimated how long it takes to overtake a bus and a car appeared on the other side when was already overtaking and the other car was driving very fast.

OP posts:
Theythinkitsalloveritisnow · 30/12/2021 21:00

I do feel the bit about him never having overtaken anything other than a cyclist before in 5 years of driving like the fact that drink drivers are always caught the very first time they've ever done it Hmm

Steelesauce · 30/12/2021 21:00

My ex went 60mph into a lamp post in a 30zone with 3 kids in the car not in car seats and got done for driving without due care and attention. 300quid fine and 4 points. He'll be fine.

billyt · 30/12/2021 21:00

He needs to be penalised for his poor driving, Careless at best, dangerous more likely. not allowing sufficient space to overtake and get back to his side safely.

It's always the same. Overtaking safely and suddenly a car appears out of nowhere as if by magic. Sounds like he took a chance and got it very wrong.

You should be feeling very sorry for the other people who have to suffer, however 'slightly'Hmm and less about your friends' son. Of course, you're only ever going to get his 'I'm so innocent, never ever over taken anything but a bike in 5 years' bollocks story. He's hardly likely to admit he was driving like a twat.

TooWicked · 30/12/2021 21:01

And again, he made a careless and dangerous decision.

What does how nice he is have to do with this?