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Original poster

Friend's DS might be prosecuted for dangerous driving

250 replies

walnutroaster · 30/12/2021 20:41

Hi I've name changed for this as I don't want my other posts linked to this. My very close friends DS who is in his early 20's was recently involved in a car accident, he is fine and the passenger in the other car suffered minor injuries but are ok.

Friends DS caused the accident as he decided to overtake a bus which was going quite slow, when he over took the bus the other side was clear but when he was overtaking the bus a car came in the other direction and unfortunately he didn't have enough time to get around the bus and he crashed head on in to the car. Her DS is obviously at fault and I'm not trying to excuse what he did. Friends DS said this was the first time driving in nearly 5 years that he has overtaken anything over than a cyclist.

Friend insisted her DS made a genuine mistake and is the first mistake he has made driving, I know I might sound like I am excusing the DS but he is such a lovely and well behaved young man so I genuinely believe he made a one off mistake which he will never make aging. Her DS has said he will never overtake a vehicle again, I don't believe he is a threat to other road users.

Friends DS is scared he is going to get prosecuted for dangerous driving, my DH seems to think he should be charged as he could have killed someone and I need to stop having such a soft spot for him. I said to DH I don't think he deserves a driving ban as he made one genuine mistake which he won't do again but DH seems to think if the DS does not get banned it makes a mockery of the legal system.

AIBU to lenient on my friends DS?

OP posts:
Lime37 · 31/12/2021 07:27

If he is dyspraxic that is even worse. I am dyspraxic and part of the condition I know I am not good at judgeing distance speed etc. he shouldn’t be taken chances especially when it’s harder for him to judge them

ParkingDiagram · 31/12/2021 07:57

This is very weird. Why are you so invested?

I’m not normally as militant as most MNers about driving but it sounds like he performed a dangerous overtake and caused an accident. Of course he should face consequences.

swissmummy12345 · 31/12/2021 08:06

@walnutroaster

I forgot to add in my OP that my friends DS is dyspraxic but I don't know if it is relevant at all to what he did.
Replies not going your way? Any more drip drip of information. Does he volunteer at an animal rescue centre at weekends to make him sound more like a lovely lad? Look you're not going to change anyones mind here. The guy drove like a twat and has to face the consequences.
Shade17 · 31/12/2021 10:48

We ALL make mistakes and mis-judgements whilst driving, but 99% of the time get away with it. Anyone who claims not to is either a liar or such a terrible driver that they’re oblivious to their own errors. The best thing for this guy would be to join the IAM, he’ll learn how to make progress/safely overtake etc, that’s much better than stating he’ll never overtake again.

ancientgran · 31/12/2021 11:17

@NannaMcPhoo

What about the fact that the car on the other side was speeding? He shouldn't of been speeding. Normally this is a MN Cardinal sin. But not today it would seem

If the other driver was speeding yes it might have been a contributing factor to the accident but the blame is still with the overtaking car. If you do not have sufficient visibility to see what is approaching on the other side of the road then you must not go on the other side of the road. End of story.

How much over the limit the other driver was makes a big difference, if he was doing 40 in a 30 mph zone then I agree the young man should have allowed enough leeway for that, if he was doing 70 in 20 mph zone then I think the one doing 70 is more to blame.

The road at the rear of my house is mainly 30 mph, a bit is 20 due to school, but people regularly do 50, 60 or 70 mph when they think the road is clear and there are some terrible accidents primarily caused by speed.

ancientgran · 31/12/2021 11:22

@AffIt

A friend of mine was pulled over and prosecuted for 'morning after' DD about five years ago (we are in Scotland, so zero tolerance for DD).

He's a social worker, one of the best people I know. But what he did was against the law, so he was prosecuted, paid a fine and received a 12-month ban, which is the minimum here.

Why do you think your 'friend's' son should receive any less?

I am assuming DD is driving while over the limit? Not dangerous driving? Forgive me if that is wrong. If he was over the limit that is a fact, no one guessing that he looks drunk, his breath smells etc. He was over the limit scientific fact. Different with the young man in the OP, we don't know all the facts, people who will see all the facts will make the decision. If he's guilty he will get the penalty, if he isn't he won't.
LolaButt · 31/12/2021 11:28

My kids are growing up without their Father because of a dangerous driver.

Of course he should be prosecuted. Dangerous driving absolutely destroys lives. Just because he may be a good boy it doesn’t exempt him from the consequences.

That excuse is like the excuses made for rapists - “oh they’re a great player for the school team”, “he’s such a handsome guy he would never do that”.

Being an apologist for someone who has hurt or only by dumb luck has avoided hurting someone, is just as bad.

ThisIsStartingToBoreMe · 31/12/2021 11:31

OP - is this your son or not?

Regardless, asking whether you should be lenient on him is utterly bizzare - it doesn't matter what approach you take, the police will either prosecute him or they wont.

And regarding the dysparaxia, if he's not safe to drive he shouldn't be driving.

GladAllOver · 31/12/2021 11:35

The CPS will decide whether he is prosecuted. The court will decide the sentence. Nothing to do with you.

JuergenSchwarzwald · 31/12/2021 11:38

@Shade17

We ALL make mistakes and mis-judgements whilst driving, but 99% of the time get away with it. Anyone who claims not to is either a liar or such a terrible driver that they’re oblivious to their own errors. The best thing for this guy would be to join the IAM, he’ll learn how to make progress/safely overtake etc, that’s much better than stating he’ll never overtake again.
Yes this is a good suggestion. They also do observer drives for young people where they go out with them for an hour and tell them what they are doing well and what they could do better. Sounds like a great idea.
BronwenFrideswide · 31/12/2021 11:54

How much over the limit the other driver was makes a big difference, if he was doing 40 in a 30 mph zone then I agree the young man should have allowed enough leeway for that, if he was doing 70 in 20 mph zone then I think the one doing 70 is more to blame.

Firstly, we only have the lovely young man's word that the other car was speeding, said lovely young man who can't judge distance, speed and clearance when overtaking.

Secondly, if the oncoming car had been doing 70 miles and hour a head on collision would result in far more than minor injuries for one person and no injuries at all for the other.

Karatema · 31/12/2021 11:56

@LolaButt

My kids are growing up without their Father because of a dangerous driver.

Of course he should be prosecuted. Dangerous driving absolutely destroys lives. Just because he may be a good boy it doesn’t exempt him from the consequences.

That excuse is like the excuses made for rapists - “oh they’re a great player for the school team”, “he’s such a handsome guy he would never do that”.

Being an apologist for someone who has hurt or only by dumb luck has avoided hurting someone, is just as bad.

So sorry for your loss @LolaButt.

OP there are many families who have lost loved ones through a driver's carelessness. I was lucky my cyclist son "only" had several bones broken when he was hit by one car, who was overtaking him, which catapulted him into the path of another! The police took his helmet camera evidence but he never heard if the driver was prosecuted. If he hadn't been wearing a helmet he would have died (doc told him).

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 31/12/2021 11:58

[quote BathTangle]I would have thought he might be charged with Careless Driving.
You can use this guidance to see where the offence might fit and what the likely outcome might be (IANAL): www.sentencingcouncil.org.uk/offences/magistrates-court/item/careless-driving-drive-without-due-care-and-attention-revised-2017/[/quote]
Just came on to say this. And yes, I have enough experience in that field to give a considered opinion. Dangerous driving is a much more rare prosecution, unless there are much more serious consequences, IMO.

BatshitBanshee · 31/12/2021 12:04

@walnutroaster

Sorry if it wasn't clear I should have worded it better but when the DS decided to overtake the bus the over side of the road was clear no car coming however the DS underestimated how long it takes to overtake a bus and a car appeared on the other side when was already overtaking and the other car was driving very fast.
Stop excusing him. Buses are long, it's a given it's going to take a while to overtake and not a quick maneuver. A car just doesn't appear out of nowhere, I'm guessing there was a bend, a camber in the road or a dip... All of which a good driver would have accounted for and stayed the f**k behind the bus. Decent drivers would have also accounted for speeding oncoming vehicles and measured whether they could overtake the bus in time. Answer: no.

He could have killed someone. He could have killed me, you, a child... But if he's lovely I guess it's fine Hmm

Changechangychange · 31/12/2021 12:10

@walnutroaster

Sorry if it wasn't clear I should have worded it better but when the DS decided to overtake the bus the over side of the road was clear no car coming however the DS underestimated how long it takes to overtake a bus and a car appeared on the other side when was already overtaking and the other car was driving very fast.
So he obviously couldn’t see far enough ahead of him to judge whether it was safe to overtake. The fact he can’t actually judge distances and relative speeds safely enough to know whether he has time to overtake or not is really troubling.

OP, do you think most people involved in car accidents are cackling maniacs, or do you understand that they are mostly perfectly nice people who make a really bad judgement call?

SunshineOnKeith · 31/12/2021 12:21

It sound like he overtook without adequate visibility of the road ahead.
That's dangerous.

Saying he'll never overtake a vehicle again is just as dangerous.
Regardless of the outcome of this incident he needs to improve his driving skills

Avaynia · 31/12/2021 12:33

@slashlover

This whole "he's such a lovely lad" narrative is why Brock Turner got such a lenient sentence.
Agreed. I’m 🙄 at the excuses that come out when men do shit like this. They’re always “lovely” or “so nice.”
RockinHorseShit · 31/12/2021 12:37

It only takes one mistake to kill or maim a car or more full of people

Good character has nothing to do with it, yes he should be punished accordingly. That way it sends a good message to others that it's never a good idea to take such risks, ever, not even once...

Diditreallylookawful · 31/12/2021 13:01

I lost a very, very close family member to a dangerous driver. In court there were various personal statements from the accused's friends about "what a lovely guy he is". All utterly irrelevant. The judge said as much. This individual was, quite rightly, sent to prison.

I know this young man didn't kill anyone, but he could have done. He should face whatever charges the CPS decide are correct.

zingally · 31/12/2021 13:06

I had a similar accident when I mis-understood a set of traffic lights, and turned right into the path of a van, which hit me side on.

The police came, looked at the lights, agreed they might be easy to mis-understand if you weren't familiar with them (I was in an unfamiliar town about an hour away), and let me off. I could have been done for driving without due care and attention. I think they also looked at my written-off car and probably decided I'd learnt my lesson and the state of the car was punishment enough.

Mushypeasandchipstogo · 31/12/2021 13:06

Nothing to do with you really and besides you only have one side of the story. Yes it does sound like dangerous driving.

CriminalOrator · 31/12/2021 13:09

You can’t not punish someone for doing something dangerous because they’re nice and have dyspraxia.

YourenutsmiLord · 31/12/2021 13:12

Were they on open country road like an A road? Does he have dash cam which can prove the bad driving of the other driver? If he was in town could a pedestrian be injured. It might have been a v long bus but you normally ram on the brakes and juke in behind before you hit other car.
Imv if he only gets points on his licence he has been lucky.

thetinsoldier · 31/12/2021 14:00

He's never overtaken anything in five years? Nonsense.

He made a mistake. He could have killed someone. You have to check that you have enough room when overtaking.

It's up to the police - they will decide whether to prosecute.

BronwenFrideswide · 31/12/2021 14:49

He's never overtaken anything in five years? Nonsense.

Only cyclists apparently and then leapt from them to overtaking a bus and underestimated how long it takes to overtake a bus, an accident waiting to happen and oh look, it did.