Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 ··· 5 6 7 8 9 10

Original poster

Friend's DS might be prosecuted for dangerous driving

250 replies

walnutroaster · 30/12/2021 20:41

Hi I've name changed for this as I don't want my other posts linked to this. My very close friends DS who is in his early 20's was recently involved in a car accident, he is fine and the passenger in the other car suffered minor injuries but are ok.

Friends DS caused the accident as he decided to overtake a bus which was going quite slow, when he over took the bus the other side was clear but when he was overtaking the bus a car came in the other direction and unfortunately he didn't have enough time to get around the bus and he crashed head on in to the car. Her DS is obviously at fault and I'm not trying to excuse what he did. Friends DS said this was the first time driving in nearly 5 years that he has overtaken anything over than a cyclist.

Friend insisted her DS made a genuine mistake and is the first mistake he has made driving, I know I might sound like I am excusing the DS but he is such a lovely and well behaved young man so I genuinely believe he made a one off mistake which he will never make aging. Her DS has said he will never overtake a vehicle again, I don't believe he is a threat to other road users.

Friends DS is scared he is going to get prosecuted for dangerous driving, my DH seems to think he should be charged as he could have killed someone and I need to stop having such a soft spot for him. I said to DH I don't think he deserves a driving ban as he made one genuine mistake which he won't do again but DH seems to think if the DS does not get banned it makes a mockery of the legal system.

AIBU to lenient on my friends DS?

OP posts:

DrSbaitso · 31/12/2021 14:59

Your friend?

Frazzled50yrold · 31/12/2021 15:05

Sounds like he caused a head on collision, it's not just nasty badly behaved people who kill innocent passers by in accidents. He I'll judged the situation and is really lucky no one died. That's the only spirit in which he or his friends can take it.

IWentAwayIStayedAway · 31/12/2021 15:07

Guarantee it was not his 1st time doing a stupid manoeuvre. It was however his 1st time being caught.

lioncitygirl · 31/12/2021 15:11

He could have killed somebody. Definitely needs to be prosecuted.

Aquamarine1029 · 31/12/2021 15:17

I hope to hell he is prosecuted and given as harsh a sentence that's allowable. What he did was criminally negligent, he could have killed someone, FFS. The consequences for these types of incidents need to be MUCH more severe than they currently are. This was no "mistake", he made a horrible choice.

ProfessorSlocombe · 31/12/2021 15:36

@walnutroaster

Sorry if it wasn't clear I should have worded it better but when the DS decided to overtake the bus the over side of the road was clear no car coming however the DS underestimated how long it takes to overtake a bus and a car appeared on the other side when was already overtaking and the other car was driving very fast.

You really aren't doing anyone any favours here. Already - in 2 posts - the story has changed significantly.

When overtaking anything on the road (stationary or not ...) the onus is on the driver to ensure the maneuver can be carried out safely.

Clearly that never happened, so we are already straying into careless driving at best.

If we keep digging, I suspect we'll learn that DS knew that they hadn't checked properly, but decided to overtake anyway. At which point you've gone from careless to reckless and possibly dangerous. Not bad for a couple of questions work.

Many years ago, 2 14 year olds were knocked over and killed by a driver that overtook a "bus going slowly". The reason it was going slow (and indeed stopping) was to allow them to cross safely in front of it. The poor bus driver saw the car start to overtake in his mirror and couldn't do anything - they never worked again.

Crankley · 31/12/2021 16:03

Your drip feeding changes nothing. He could have easily have killed someone and I'm guessing if you had been in the other car he hit head on, you wouldn't be quite so desperate to absolve him of his actions. Not knowing the symptoms of dyspraxia I googled:

Symptoms of dyspraxia
poor balance
poor posture
fatigue
clumsiness
differences in speech
perception problems
poor hand-eye coordination

I would question if he should be driving at all.

ancientgran · 31/12/2021 16:10

@BronwenFrideswide

How much over the limit the other driver was makes a big difference, if he was doing 40 in a 30 mph zone then I agree the young man should have allowed enough leeway for that, if he was doing 70 in 20 mph zone then I think the one doing 70 is more to blame.

Firstly, we only have the lovely young man's word that the other car was speeding, said lovely young man who can't judge distance, speed and clearance when overtaking.

Secondly, if the oncoming car had been doing 70 miles and hour a head on collision would result in far more than minor injuries for one person and no injuries at all for the other.

We only know what the OP has told us but people seem to just know the whole story.

I'm assuming both drivers would slow down if heading for a collision so the 70mph could have put them on a collision course but they would hopefully have braked and slowed down before they actually collided. Not to mention that 70mph was just an example, it could have been less but still made a collision happen.

The point is none of us know all the details, including the OP, so all the he's definitely at fault, it was dangerous driving etc isn't appropriate. You can certainly see how lynch mobs happen.

doglikescheeseontoast · 31/12/2021 16:14

Yesterday, I accompanied a friend of mine to the plaster/fracture clinic at hospital. I say I accompanied her - I took her there and left her outside the clinic because, with COVID, no one is allowed in with patients who are obviously already scared and in pain.

My friend went as an outpatient yesterday, but with complications of the accident that left her hospitalised for nearly 2 weeks a month ago.

The accident was a head-on crash caused by someone who decided to overtake someone 'going quite slow'.

I have seen first hand the effects that this 'genuine mistake' (or any of the other excuses you make for this reckless driver) have made on my friend's entire family, her husband, her children, potentially her career and every other aspect of her life.

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 31/12/2021 17:30

IMO he would've seen whether a car was coming on the other side. He would've been driving quite a bit faster than the bus to be able to overtake it so either he was right up the bus's arse and didn't have enough space to speed up or the other car came very very fast. Was it a blind bend?

Herecomesthesun70 · 31/12/2021 17:46

Have the police indicated he might be charged?

vivainsomnia · 31/12/2021 17:54

A colleague of mine died at 50 being hit head on by a 18yo Who 2as overtaking another car.

A good lad supposedly if a bit arrogant and feeling invincible as commonly at this age.

Of course he thought there was no car coming in the other direction. Of course it was a mistake. Of course he didn't drive like a maniac, but it still end up with a lovely person dying, leaving her husband, kids and friends in tears.

He got two years in jail. Your friends' boy might get away with jail since he did t kill anyone but your excuses are pathetic.

OliveToboogie · 31/12/2021 18:02

Not up to you or his parents or the boy himself. Up to police and procurator as to if going to prosecute. If you do the crime got to do the time end off.

BronwenFrideswide · 31/12/2021 18:40

The point is none of us know all the details, including the OP, so all the he's definitely at fault, it was dangerous driving etc isn't appropriate. You can certainly see how lynch mobs happen.

He definitely is at fault he was on the wrong side of the road ffs. Very convenient that the oncoming car just happened to be going fast, this detail from someone who underestimated how long it takes to overtake a bus, I'd take his idea of going fast with a bucket of salt.

eagerlywaitingfor · 31/12/2021 18:53

If it took a long time to overtake the bus, then it clearly wasn't travelling as slowly as he says it was, and if another car 'appeared' and was travelling fast, then there must have been a bend in the road up ahead which means that he couldn't see far enough ahead to know that the road was clear.

Whether it was an error of judgement due to inexperience, or due to carelessness or whatever, it doesn't matter. He was at fault, and he caused the accident. If the police decide to prosecute, then so be it.

Throckmorton · 31/12/2021 21:32

He clearly is a dangerous driver - he made an error of judgement that a safe driver would not have made. I hope they ban him

ParkingDiagram · 31/12/2021 22:20

FWIW, I think drivers who cause an accident through misjudgment and who don’t cause death or serious injury should have to attend a driving course. I don’t mean a speed awareness course, but one which teaches drivers to judge speeds, distances, understand their own vehicle’s performance. But also looks at bad decisions and consequences.

Driving standards in this country are abysmal. People have no desire to improve their driving skills after passing their test, they just want to get from A to B as quickly and easily as possible.

ProfessorSlocombe · 01/01/2022 11:41

Excellent idea. We could call it a "driving test".

EverdeRose · 01/01/2022 12:25

If the other car was speeding the police will be able to tell by measuring the skid marks left on the road.

Having dysbraxia is no defence.

Hundreds of people have their licence to drive removed daily. You don't have the right to get behind the wheel and do a shite job driving and nearly kill someone because you've got a disability.

MabelsApron · 01/01/2022 12:55

Another one who thinks this is your son. If I were your friend, I wouldn’t be very impressed at you posting about this on MN for strangers to weigh in on. I think this has happened to your son and you’re trying to see what the public would make of it if, in case he gets prosecuted.

Loveisthere · 01/01/2022 12:57

Not sure I would believe that in 5 years he has only overtaken a bike. I cannot remember how many times I have heard it was the first time I did xyz, when I worked in the Courts and the magistrates will have heard it countless times. He needs to take responsibility for his actions and if at his age he does not know the length of a bus to overtake safely my advice to him would be to give up driving

ProfessorSlocombe · 01/01/2022 13:10

If the other car was speeding the police will be able to tell by measuring the skid marks left on the road.

Only if the ABS was faulty.

ancientgran · 01/01/2022 13:35

@eagerlywaitingfor

I was driving down my narrow twisting Devon road yesterday and it occurred to me that I couldn't drive anywhere if I never managed to overtake parked cars when close to a bend. It is particularly nerve wracking between 8 am and 9 am and 3 pm and 6 pm on school days as some parents drive too fast for the road conditions when dropping off/picking up at school/wraparound care/pre school.

Most of us residents crawl round the bends in the road but a significant number of people from the school seem to think they can see round corners or maybe they just assume no one else uses the road. I've had a few near misses. Parents probably struggling with time but it is so dangerous.

There is also the issue of school parents parking right on the bends further obscuring the view.

If one of the parents comes hurtling round a bend while I'm passing a parked car and we collide I will not accept it is my fault as I am cautious and driving at an appropriate speed. I would fight it in court as my colleague did and she won the case.

IWentAwayIStayedAway · 01/01/2022 15:52

@walnutroaster any update?

Vapeyvapevape · 01/01/2022 17:30

I’ll be surprised if the Op comes back.

Flip

1 2 ··· 5 6 7 8 9 10

Swipe left for the next trending thread