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AIBU?

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Original poster

Embarrassing shit your kid has done?

210 replies

Coughly · 21/12/2021 14:15

My son (11 months) apparently now finds it hilarious to "cough". It's a fake cough, but he thinks it's awesome and does it repeatedly now to anyone we see. As you can appreciate, in the current climate it's obviously not great! 🤦‍♀️ I think it started when he had an actual cough a few months back and he realised it got him attention when he did it!

I've heard friends horror stories of their toddlers/young children pointing out a stranger's spot or equally awkward things! Anyone got any stories to lighten up our Tuesday?

OP posts:
toddybell · 24/12/2021 19:54

@shouldistop

Ha, my baby went through the fake coughing stage. In fact both of mine did but with my 5yo there wasn't a pandemic on so it was cute rather than embarrassing.

My older son asked loudly why someone was so fat when he was about 3. Blush we then had a chat about why fat isn't a kind word. He's 5.5 now and won't let me call the hungry caterpillar or the high way rat fat when I'm reading the books!

Would be really interested to know more about the 'fat' conversation you had. We're at that point now.

Fimofriend · 24/12/2021 20:02

We went to a village fete. My daughter was five years old. We both needed the toilet. I told her I would be a while as I needed to poop. While she was washing her hands she loudly told another woman who entered that her mum was pooping. "MY MUM IS POOPING!!!". Thanks, honey.

Lex345 · 24/12/2021 20:08

We were playing Cats and Dogs one summer evening in the garden. If you have never played, you basically choose a few categories like countries, colours, foods etc and then you have to get something in each category beginning with the same letter, first to finish shouts stop the bus and then you read out your answers and get points for each one.

We did L. My youngest's answer for country was "Labia". We all fell about laughing, and ever the showman, he took this as an invitation to prance around the garden shouting Labia at the top of his lungs.

Next door were having a barbecue with about 15 guests.

Its not OK. 🤣

PS His birthday presents included an Atlas after this

loveablequalities · 25/12/2021 00:50

@Lex345

Surely the game is called Stop the Bus?!

Lex345 · 25/12/2021 00:52

My dad always called it Cats and Dogs...no idea why!

Twillow · 25/12/2021 00:57

@RavenclawsRoar

Dc1 in the middle of a very busy car park at about the age of 2 decided that not only would he physically resist all attempts to get him in his car seat, he would also vocally add to it with "let me go! I don't know you! I DON'T KNOW YOU!!! Where's mummy?" I was so embarrassed and flustered- I was absolutely convinced someone was going to call the police. Luckily I think everyone who saw us (there were a few concerned glances), realised that he was definitely mine as he's basically my carbon copy and I was practically in tears at this point which I doubt is typical kidnapper behaviour Grin
Yes there is a downside to teaching this to smart kids! One of mine would do the same "YOU'RE NOT MY MUMMY, LET ME GO etc I do wonder why no-one ever intervened....
Buytoomuchonebay · 25/12/2021 01:07

I once got a phone call from my then 14 year old sons school
‘Could I please come and pick up an object he has brought in?’
I trotted round but as it was a boiling hot day I didn’t bother with a coat or bag-I was just wearing a summer dress and flip flops with my house keys in hand
Anyway,I get there and the teacher hands me an 8’ dildo!
I had to do the walk of shame,back down the road,trying so bloody hard to hide it and then run back to pick up his siblings

Another time my mother had brought round 67 packets of cheap noodles
Fuck knows why the same son took the whole lot to school,dragged them round with him all day,then brought them home again
I asked him years later and he didn’t know either…

WorriedMumofTeen16 · 25/12/2021 01:25

DD would have been about 3. We were in Tesco and a rather overweight lady put 2 bags of frozen chips in her basket just in front of us. DD pipes up, at the top of her voice, "Mummy I think that lady has had enough chips don't you?" I wanted the ground to open and swallow me

Armychefbethebest · 25/12/2021 02:20

When my eldest was 5 she took my loveeggs from my bedroom drawer and took them out to play. We lived on an army barracks at the time and around 200 families also lived on camp all of which had to walk past my house to get to the shop . I went out to said shop to see my bright purple loveeggs laying on the pavement in front of my house oh how I laughed ....... and curled up and died a little as I realised every fucker had now seen my toys. When I asked dd why she had bee n in my drawer and took my things out side she said she thought it was a bobble Grin

InkieNecro · 27/12/2021 14:36

@Buytoomuchonebay

I once got a phone call from my then 14 year old sons school ‘Could I please come and pick up an object he has brought in?’ I trotted round but as it was a boiling hot day I didn’t bother with a coat or bag-I was just wearing a summer dress and flip flops with my house keys in hand Anyway,I get there and the teacher hands me an 8’ dildo! I had to do the walk of shame,back down the road,trying so bloody hard to hide it and then run back to pick up his siblings

Another time my mother had brought round 67 packets of cheap noodles
Fuck knows why the same son took the whole lot to school,dragged them round with him all day,then brought them home again
I asked him years later and he didn’t know either…

I hope you mean 8" rather than 8' Grin have a hard time hiding that!
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