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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder why this has come through the post for DH..?

258 replies

namechangedaily · 07/12/2021 14:43

Saw an opened perfumed shaped parcel on the side and curiosity got the better of me so thought I'd sneak and see if it was the Chanel perfume I'd be hinting about. Found this..
Would you assume it's a secret Santa?
Or I've just had a baby and he clearly isn't getting enough...

If you've found this page in your search of the best couples sex toys that have been recommended by fellow Mumsnet users, you might find our guide to the best sex toys for couples useful. Hope this helps! MNHQ

OP posts:
Original poster
namechangedaily · 07/12/2021 15:28

I wish it was a wind up.. genuinely hoped it would be my Chanel Gabrielle perfume.. the box was perfume shaped! 😂 some of these answers I can't help but laugh! He's home about 7! It was just left on the side.. thankfully DS who's 5 didn't see it!!

OP posts:
Original poster
namechangedaily · 07/12/2021 15:29

PS thank you about the nails comment! I'm actually missing one but you can't see it on the photo haha

OP posts:
WhatATimeToBeAlive · 07/12/2021 15:29

My dog's called Ella :(

Original poster
namechangedaily · 07/12/2021 15:29

@TheVanguardSix

Looks like you need to send your other half a box of these.
Hahah amazing! 😂
OP posts:
BigSandyBalls2015 · 07/12/2021 15:29

How on earth do you clean that!! 😳

blameless · 07/12/2021 15:30

So much fuss over an unbreakable vase for a long-stemmed rose. I think it's very romantic of him.

PinkAndPurpleClouds · 07/12/2021 15:31

Ewww that's grim. Not a secret Santa sorry @namechangedaily Your DH has got this for himself.

EdgeOfTheSky · 07/12/2021 15:31

“When they say "mini" they aren't kidding. I felt like I was violating an underage Gnome or Hobbit”

PussyCatEatingPigsInBlankets · 07/12/2021 15:31

@BigSandyBalls2015

How on earth do you clean that!! 😳
Not in the dishwasher, apparently.
EdgeOfTheSky · 07/12/2021 15:32

@BigSandyBalls2015

How on earth do you clean that!! 😳
Not in the dishwasher.
BobMortimersPetOwl · 07/12/2021 15:32

Don't see the big deal. Nobody needs to seek permission to buy or use a sex toy.

Thecurliestwurly · 07/12/2021 15:34

Time to use that leftover fake blood from Halloween 🤮

PussyCatEatingPigsInBlankets · 07/12/2021 15:34

@BigSandyBalls2015

How on earth do you clean that!! 😳
Maybe a Sterident tablet and some hot water? 🤷‍♀️
PestoPlum · 07/12/2021 15:35

@PussyCatEatingPigsInBlankets

DH has just googled it...yes, I know🤦‍♀️ ...it was only £14.99.

He's checking the reviews now and can't stop laughing.

"Certainly does the job, although I feel an upgrade is due as I'm quite big and kept popping out of the other end..."

😂😂😂

Popping out the other end 🤣😂🤣
TheVanguardSix · 07/12/2021 15:39

Ah OP, I do feel for you.
You JUST had a baby and seeing this makes you feel pressured to meet the needs of your man-baby at a time when you are so tired and in recovery mode (and new mum mode!).
It'd be like if your DH was about to go through chemo, rads, and surgery and your first thought is, "I'm gonna need a big, sparkly purple, gyrating plastic cock to see me through! That's my priority!"
I don't know... I'm getting old. What happened to men just slamming their dicks between two dried logs?

IntermittentParps · 07/12/2021 15:39

@Skeumorph

Don't know, but am now dying to post a Baby Names thread asking about Thrust-Ella
Grin
sammylady37 · 07/12/2021 15:43

@Justheretoaskaquestion91

There are plenty of posters on MN who are female and also own sex toys. Are they not creepy too?!

I don’t personally own any sex toys but I have to say the thought of a grown man ejaculating into this vagina decorated cup and then cleaning his sperm out afterwards is particularly grim

Do you find the thoughts of grown women cleaning their vaginal secretions off penis-shaped vibrators equally grim?
LittleGwyneth · 07/12/2021 15:43

@TheVanguardSix

Only on Mumsnet can your partner buy creepy as fuck sex "toys" and the OP is in the wrong. You lot are something else.

Right?? MN world is a strange and mysterious wonderland.

Why is this any creepier than a vibrator which is the inverse shape?
saleorbouy · 07/12/2021 15:47

I'm sure many of you ladies have toys so why can't he have something exciting for his toy box.
It's good to take care of your own needs sometimes.

BarkminsterBlue · 07/12/2021 15:48

Of all the things that I would think on finding this, “that must be a secret Santa gift” is pretty far down the list…

Aderyn21 · 07/12/2021 15:50

If anyone thought that was an appropriate secret Santa purchase, I'd worry about their judgement and whether they'd still be employed in the new year!

TheOrigRights · 07/12/2021 15:51

In which circles would this be a secret santa gift?

I got some Tote slipper socks and a hat!

PupInAPram · 07/12/2021 15:55

@Marvellousmadness

of course it is NOT a secret santa op Dont be naive.

He's not getting enough so he is satisfying his needs clearly. Just because you dont wanna engage in sex doesn't mean he cant either ..

What a lovely way with words you have @Marvellousmadness. Not.
Houseofvelour · 07/12/2021 15:55

I don't understand what's wrong with him buying himself a sex toy?
I have vibrators for myself and DH has a couple of toys for him.
We use them alone and together.

Like I honestly can't see what the problem is

Notonthenewrug · 07/12/2021 15:55

@edgeofthesky that did make me laugh!

OP he didn't do a good job to hide it. Most importantly, how do you feel about it?

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