To think *some* people are just fucking useless

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I'm in a WhatsApp group for a uni course I'm doing and the others are somewhat younger than Mme (19-22ish) and OH MY GOD they're useless at stuff.

Everything is a problem that someone else needs to sort out or a reason they can't do something.

So for example. We usually spend all day doing our modules. A morning session and and afternoon one.

Morning one has been moved online and the afternoon is on site. We have 1hr break between sessions. We've been given 3 days notice.

Them: "I can't make it for the afternoon session, I live 90 minutes away! E only have 60 minutes between sessions....Waaaah"
Me: "Kust come to campus as normal and use the library and do the session from there..."
Them: "waaaah, I can't, becaise we're not allowed use teams on my work laptop, it's not installed"
Me: "so, use the web version..."
Them: "but I haven't got headphones... waaaah"
Me: SO FUCKING BUY SOME!!!!

That’s not an unreasonable complaint imo. People shouldn’t have to be buying stuff they’ve not needed so far with three days notice, not everyone can afford it.

They actually type "waaaah"? How very odd.

Unless of course you're being ridiculously hyperbolic.

I agree!!!! I sometimes wonder if it’s an age thing!!!

I’m not that old but feel like younger people at work always whinge about their work load as if nobody before them has ever had to work like they do. I realise it’s not the same era but my parents grew up in houses without central heating… or air conditioning (one parent from Africa). My dads parents didn’t eat so they could send their oldest child to school. My grandma used to go to old car boot sales to get old jumpers to unravel to knit again.

Saying you can’t get headphones in a time where they literally cost less than a pound………. So you can’t do the work….

This is not a problem….

@JustLyra

That’s not an unreasonable complaint imo. People shouldn’t have to be buying stuff they’ve not needed so far with three days notice, not everyone can afford it.

They can afford a £3 pair if headphones. How do I know? Because they happily buy themselves aa Starbucks at break and a Subway for lunch each week.

They're just whining about the fact that they have to solve a minor problem.

And it's not like a pair of headphones is an unjustifiable expense...

They're in a free degree and being paid to do this (apprenticeship), so they could probably even get the headphones on expenses....

@JustLyra

That’s not an unreasonable complaint imo. People shouldn’t have to be buying stuff they’ve not needed so far with three days notice, not everyone can afford it.

This. Students are not known for hanging spare cash lying around.

It's a big change and it's short notice. It's very inconvenient for some. People are allowed to complain.

(And the 'Waaaah'? Did they say that, or are you trying to make them out to be babies? I hope if it's the second you don't ever complain about things that inconvenience you)

Surely the university has a computer that can be used by them ?

They sound useless to me.

Just watch you don't get cast as the 'mother' of the group, sorting out people's problems for them -- I've seen this dynamic emerge between older mature students and recent school-leavers studying the same thing, especially if there's group work.

It's not just younger people OP. I think there are some people who are so used to someone else sorting out any minor problem they have, or re-arranging things to avoid any sort on inconvenience to them, that they feel genuinely affronted when this does not happen.

For example. I help run a cubs group. I and the other leaders are all volunteers, all work and all have our own children and other caring responsibilities. We recently organised a weekend camp (giving up a full weekend, plus many hours beforehand preparing activities/risk assessments etc). Complaints we received from parents included:

• we should hand them printed letters instead of e-mailing, so they don't have to remember to check e-mails/search for the letter etc
• we should have phoned anyone who did not reply to say their child was coming (complaint from parent who ignored 4 e-mails clearly stating deadline- and actually told us that he never reads his e-mails, if something is important enough, someone will phone him)
• we shouldn't order materials/food weeks in advance, this is not fair on children who decide they want to come at the last minute.
• rather than asking parents to tell us in advance if there are any foods their child can't/won't eat, we should provide several choices for each meal; parents can't be expected to know exactly what their child does not like
• we should work with the local beavers/scouts/brownies/guides etc to all go away at the same weekend so parents with children in different sections can have a few days off

-

I don’t believe that in 2021 there’s anyone around who doesn’t have earphones. What did they do for the last year and a half??

I work in a university library. Ask staff - they probably have headphones they can use!

I do recognise the “it’s someone else’s problem to solve” attitude though, literally down to having to explain to students that yes, other students are also allowed to use desks near them, that’s how a library works, if you like to work without people around you have to go home. There is definitely a level of entitlement in some kids that I do think is new to this generation.

Yanbu.
I worked with someone like this. She had grade As all the way through life, but absolutely anything different was met with 'but I've never been taught that' or similar. Absolutely and utterly useless as an employee. Resourcefulness is a very very important skill. I can just see what it was like at school - tutors, masses of parental help,parents doing everything for her. Jut not helpful for life.

Why are you taking on a parental role on a uni what’s app? No one has actually asked you to solve anything for them, so just stop doing it. Most of time these students simply venting frustrations. And I do think 3 days notice is very short notice to re-arrange schedules. Many students have additional jobs or caring responsibilities. If they really wanted someone to solve the issue for them, they’d be emailing their tutor not posting complaints on what’s app.

Of course some people are fucking useless. For some it's genuine incompetence and for others it's tactical so that they dump their problems on to you. Both are a drain on your resources.

@EatYourVegetables

I don’t believe that in 2021 there’s anyone around who doesn’t have earphones. What did they do for the last year and a half??

Huh? I don't have earphones.

Why would I have needed earphones just because of covid? I'm assuming that's what you are referring to.

Stop problem solving for them or even stop coaching them to solve their own problems.

They’re on the look out for a ‘study mother’

My daughter ends up being the mother of the group pretty much every time she is usually one of the youngest too this year she is sharing a house with two older first year students they can't cook basic meals they can't work out the washing machine system the recycling escapes them even though there is a list on the wall she has showed them and coached them reminded them when it's there turn to do the rubbish and clean

They are switching to a uni closer to home next year they can't cope

Also what student doesn't have headphones? All the ones I've seen are permanently plugged in

For someone who is moaning about the immaturity of others, your post comes across as rather 'young' too.

They are entitled to complain about the new schedule, you are entitled to complain on here about them complaining.

If they don't want to organise themselves, it is not your job to do so. Just ignore them. Mute the WhatsApp Group Chat or just leave it entirely. They are clearly not your type of people, completely understandably, so don't subject yourself to their attitudes.

@EatYourVegetables

I don’t believe that in 2021 there’s anyone around who doesn’t have earphones. What did they do for the last year and a half??

I can’t use ear phones due to misophonia. Hurts my ears to hear sound that way. So I am always that weirdo reading on an airplane or Tube instead of having ear phones in.

@EatYourVegetables

I don’t believe that in 2021 there’s anyone around who doesn’t have earphones. What did they do for the last year and a half??

I don't have any. Don't need them don't want them.

@theelephantinthegroup

It's not just younger people OP. I think there are some people who are so used to someone else sorting out any minor problem they have, or re-arranging things to avoid any sort on inconvenience to them, that they feel genuinely affronted when this does not happen.

For example. I help run a cubs group. I and the other leaders are all volunteers, all work and all have our own children and other caring responsibilities. We recently organised a weekend camp (giving up a full weekend, plus many hours beforehand preparing activities/risk assessments etc). Complaints we received from parents included:

• we should hand them printed letters instead of e-mailing, so they don't have to remember to check e-mails/search for the letter etc
• we should have phoned anyone who did not reply to say their child was coming (complaint from parent who ignored 4 e-mails clearly stating deadline- and actually told us that he never reads his e-mails, if something is important enough, someone will phone him)
• we shouldn't order materials/food weeks in advance, this is not fair on children who decide they want to come at the last minute.
• rather than asking parents to tell us in advance if there are any foods their child can't/won't eat, we should provide several choices for each meal; parents can't be expected to know exactly what their child does not like
• we should work with the local beavers/scouts/brownies/guides etc to all go away at the same weekend so parents with children in different sections can have a few days off

-

Oh my God you're a saint to listen to that crap and not explode....I did cubs leader for a few years, purely so my child could get a place but I left when he did before I ripped someones head off. And they weren't nearly so cheeky and clueless as that.

"It's a big change and it's short notice. It's very inconvenient for some. People are allowed to complain."

No it's not, and no it isn't.

It's not at all inconvenient for them as they must attend every week anyway.

If course people can complain.. it honestly why does everything have to be such an issue allll the time.

Just think for yourselves and solve your miniscule problems yourselves.

It's not beyond imagination that this might happen again...it's a couple of quid for a cheap set of headphones, which is all that is needed. They aren't "poor university students" they could almost certainly find £1-3 for a set of headphones, and go without (for example) one of their Starbucks coffee or bring a packed lunch one day etc.

Late teens to early 20s is still a developmental age for most people though, it's when you get the last of the child edges knocked off you. With some people it takes longer than others. I guess you're seeing that process in action.

I would say that the step beyond that, the 'everyone else needs to focus on and sort out MY problem' thing, is a personality thing, and not necessarily always connected to age.

I'm doing a course at the moment. It's post-grad, and part-time, so most of the course attendees are established adults. There are a coterie who are exactly like this and they are mostly women in their 30s and 40s.

@FluffyBooBoo because 98% of stuff has been done online in the last 18 months.

Every single person in my household has earphones of some description, be that proper over the head ones, ear buds, proper meeting headset, free ones that came with the phones. How else did several people work from home and home school all at the same time?!

Maybe they are just venting and you're 'helpful' suggestions are getting in the way if that. I would be pissed off by that new schedule too - surely it makes more sense to come in for full days but less of them (e.g. 2 full days rather than 4 afternoons). Travel is expensive and time consuming.

That should be 'There is a coterie...'