Page 6 | Telling 9yo DC that santa doesn't exist

Jessica60 · 2021-10-16T20:43:41+00:00

My recently turned 9 year old figured out the tooth fairy doesn't exist this morning as I forgot to put money and remove tooth. She then said "does Santa even exist" It was first thing in the morning, really early and I just replied "no he doesn't " I did this as I thought she had already worked it out and didn't want to lie. She then had a full on meltdown and couldn't believe he wasn't real. I then explained the story of the real saint nic but she has been upset all day. Was I unreasonable telling her at this age? If I had time to think i would have probably come with a good excuse.

YourFinestPantaloons · 17/10/2021 15:28

@ronkey

I asked the teacher why he said it, his reply was, “I’m here to teach maths not perpetuate fairy stories because the parents want to infantilise their children. It’s not like they weren’t going to find out one day, I just did the kid a favour.”

Wowsers I wonder what his school reports are like for the kids!

In fairness he's absolutely it Ely right - his job is to teach maths not to go along with fairy stories

The only shameful ones in this situation are the parents allowing a child to go to secondary school still believing in Santa. I'm always a little that children of that age haven't actually figured it of on their own accord yet

YourFinestPantaloons · 17/10/2021 15:31

I would be a little concerned about the critical thinking capabilities of a 9yo who still believed tbh.

Yes, same. My DD is 9 and very much middle of the road in school, is where she should be intelligence wise, not one bit above or below. But even she figured it out last year. Even after, when she was 7, she woke at 3am and I connected to Alexa and played a "Ho Ho Ho" sounds with jingle bells so it sounded like he was downstairs. She called out "SANTA!" and was so happy

A year later - Meh he's obviously not real mum, that must have been Alexa or something playing that sound 🤣

Should I just book the therapy sessions now do you think?

YourFinestPantaloons · 17/10/2021 15:33

@SpeakingFranglais

I’ve never told mine he didn’t exist. They went to high school believing and I guess eventually worked it out. I was still telling them in their late teens that if they don’t believe he won’t come.

My friend was horrified I let them go to high school believing, she said they would be bullied. Of course they weren’t, there was no one day finding out the shocking truth.

Of course they knew he wasn't real! The reason you think they still believed in high school is because you essentially threatened them with no presents if they said they didn't believe. They were lying to you

YourFinestPantaloons · 17/10/2021 15:36

@douliket

I think her age is irrelevant here,the issue is the way you handled that whole discussion. It's a belief that your dd has had her entire life and is the most wonderful time of year for a child. You could have explained that The real Magic of Christmas came from the legend of St. Nick and that magic is real as people around the world work together to keep the secret going and there's nothing more magical than making others happy. The way you blurted it out was just mean to do that to a child. She probably thinks her Christmas is over forever. Please don't leave it there,have a chat with her

"She probably thinks her Christmas is over forever" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

FFS, get real

As for the utterly wank-filled explanation of why Santa is still real/magical I think you seriously underestimate children's intelligence

Pythonista · 17/10/2021 15:36

I worked it out at 5 but thought my parents wouldn't buy me any presents if it admitted jt

cantkeepawayforever · 17/10/2021 15:38

Poor kids being told at 5+6 sad so sad! They've only had two years of really understanding what goes on at Christmas. Tragic loss of childhood.

My children never 'believed' in Father Christmas. They have always had Farther Christmas as a wonderful, magical, 'let's pretend' story that we love to tell at Christmas time.

Guess who still had fantastic, magical, 'let's pretend' christmases right up to children in their late teens, all having a wonderful time, opening stockings in the early morning, following Norad etc etc? Yes, that would be us.

Always having FC as a 'magical let's pretend' story means that the magic of Christmas doesn't come to an abrupt end when they find out the 'truth' - it can go on as long as family traditions survive.

YourFinestPantaloons · 17/10/2021 15:38

@BubblingBottle

Poor kids being told at 5+6

so sad! They've only had two years of really understanding what goes on at Christmas. Tragic loss of childhood. 7&8 discussions at school about it really begin. 9-11 pretend they still believe for presents. I was in this category and remember the magic being lost as mum admitted to me. Oh the world stopped turning that morning for me but the next day I'd moved on. It's never a pleasant chat but should always be done with utmost care and planning as you never know how the kid will take it. You really should have been prepping for this question tbh.

A TRAGIC LOSS OF CHILDHOOD!!!!

Hahahahahaha

This thread is hilarious.

I know a few people whose parents never have done the whole Santa thing. They never believed. They may as well just don't a suit and go find a job in banking, seeing as what defines 'childhood' is not being under 18, it believing in Santa 😂😂😂😂

What a bunch of drips some of you are.

Tal45 · 17/10/2021 15:40

I would have said 'What do you think?' and let her lead me. It's weird to drill kids that FC exists and then when they still believe pull the rug from under their feet IMO. They generally figure it out in the last couple years of primary school IME.

Pythonista · 17/10/2021 15:42

Fucking hell. Save your sympathy for those children who don't get presents or a proper Christmas. Finding out Santa isn't real doesn't actually compare

YourFinestPantaloons · 17/10/2021 15:42

DS is only 5 and, like with DD, we tell him that once Santa gets his lists, he sends them to his accountant and then parents get an invoice, everyone is asked for the same amount And that sometimes he asks family member to get stuff outside the budget. Hence why granny gets something of their list too. I made it up on the spot in a panic once after a "Who pays for the presents, if it's Santa where does he get the money"

icedcoffees · 17/10/2021 15:42

@BubblingBottle

Poor kids being told at 5+6

so sad! They've only had two years of really understanding what goes on at Christmas. Tragic loss of childhood. 7&8 discussions at school about it really begin. 9-11 pretend they still believe for presents. I was in this category and remember the magic being lost as mum admitted to me. Oh the world stopped turning that morning for me but the next day I'd moved on. It's never a pleasant chat but should always be done with utmost care and planning as you never know how the kid will take it. You really should have been prepping for this question tbh.

I never believed - does that mean I never had a childhood?

YourFinestPantaloons · 17/10/2021 15:44

@sTRUTHiomimus

Some of you sound like complete fun sponges.

One of my kids had two teeth extracted ( for orthodontic work ) at 14 and the tooth fairy still left him money. Sadly the dentist kept the teeth but the fairy knew this and still came that night.

Life can be tough and we all need more fun and magic in our lives 🧚🏻‍♂️

But your 14yo knew it was bollocks? I'd have done the biggest teenager eye roll and Kevin "ugh youre sooooooo sad!!" if my mum had done this

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 17/10/2021 15:47

YABU have you not seen Elf? Of course Santa exists!

My 8 yo still believes and l want her to still believe. It's like the end of innocence when they find out.

MissMaple82 · 17/10/2021 15:49

Brutal. I think your a pretty cruel mum. I feel so sad for your child 😔

YourFinestPantaloons · 17/10/2021 15:49

If some of you think the end of innocence is when they no longer believe in Santa, you're absolutely fucked when they start having sex and drinking alcohol. Get a grip!

YourFinestPantaloons · 17/10/2021 15:50

@MissMaple82

Brutal. I think your a pretty cruel mum. I feel so sad for your child 😔

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

sTRUTHiomimus · 17/10/2021 15:51

But your 14yo knew it was bollocks?
I'd have done the biggest teenager eye roll and Kevin "ugh youre sooooooo sad!!" if my mum had done this gringrin

Of course he rolled his eyes and laughed at me. But he was laughing after he had two teeth out, so that’s a good thing in my book. And he didn’t return the tooth fairy money 😉

They laugh at me when I get them to put out whisky for Santa and a carrot for the reindeer too. But Santa still drinks it despite their laughter.

What’s not to like - whiskey and laughter. And a reminder of the magic of Christmas .

MissMaple82 · 17/10/2021 15:52

Some dickhead comments on this thread

icedcoffees · 17/10/2021 15:53

My 8 yo still believes and l want her to still believe. It's like the end of innocence when they find out.

It really, really isn't. Children the world over manage to remain innocent without believing in Father Christmas, you know.

icedcoffees · 17/10/2021 15:54

@MissMaple82

Brutal. I think your a pretty cruel mum. I feel so sad for your child 😔

I really hope you're joking.

YourFinestPantaloons · 17/10/2021 15:54

@MissMaple82

Some dickhead comments on this thread

Agree, like the ones they're saying are sad for the OP's child. Who is 9. And isn't being lied to. And is fine. Massively dickhead thing to say

Pythonista · 17/10/2021 15:55

End of innocence???

YourFinestPantaloons · 17/10/2021 15:56

@sTRUTHiomimus

*But your 14yo knew it was bollocks? I'd have done the biggest teenager eye roll and Kevin "ugh youre sooooooo sad!!" if my mum had done this gringrin*

Of course he rolled his eyes and laughed at me. But he was laughing after he had two teeth out, so that’s a good thing in my book. And he didn’t return the tooth fairy money 😉

They laugh at me when I get them to put out whisky for Santa and a carrot for the reindeer too. But Santa still drinks it despite their laughter.

What’s not to like - whiskey and laughter. And a reminder of the magic of Christmas .

@sTRUTHiomimus oh don't get me wrong, I think it's adorable, because obviously they know the truth. It's the kind of thing teens claim to hate but will look back one day and realise it's sweet!

ItsMeAgainAndIHaventChanged · 17/10/2021 15:57

How do you all manage the other Christmas mystery? I mean all the fuss about a single mother?

BananaPB · 17/10/2021 15:58

@Pythonista

Fucking hell. Save your sympathy for those children who don't get presents or a proper Christmas. Finding out Santa isn't real doesn't actually compare

^^ This I dread to think how many kids think that they are not good enough when they don't get gifts on the 25th.