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Original poster

To have been unaware push presents are a thing here

205 replies

Yummymummy2020 · 18/09/2021 14:22

To be clear, I have never expected nor overly wanted one, but currently group of friends are in a baby boom and all six got push presents after the baby was born from their husbands and said it was the done thing, I’m just wondering aibu to think this is just an American thing or am I the one that isn’t up to speed on current trends(if so I’ll be requesting mine be backdated😂)

OP posts:
oakleaffy · 18/09/2021 17:25

What on earth is a “Push” present?
Never heard of them.

SunshineCake · 18/09/2021 17:33

No it's not a thing. Nothing is a fucking thing. People make their own choices and others decide it's a thing so they can join in, benefit, etc.

DH bought me an eternity ring nine months after our first child was born as he thought that was the traditional thing. I thought it was for after a first year of marriage.

Creamsoda77 · 18/09/2021 17:34

Its bad enough baby showers have made there way to the Uk without something ridiculous as push presents, and hurtful to those who had c sections,

Squeakycatflap · 18/09/2021 17:45

I had a lovely push present from the whole ward, and a round of applause, when I was in with constipation.

Strokethefurrywall · 18/09/2021 17:46

If it helps @Creamsoda77 everyone I know who had a C section also got a gift of some sort from their husband.

It doesn’t need a fucking label. It’s just a lovely gift given after the birth of a child. Some people do it, some don’t.

Who the fuck cares?

Incywinceyspider · 18/09/2021 17:53

An antipasti platter was sitting in the fridge when I got home. Best present ever Grin

Angel2702 · 18/09/2021 17:53

Eternity rings are often given on the birth of a child so not a new practice.

ShrinkingViolet9 · 18/09/2021 17:56

Expensive hen nights involving hotels and holidays.
Getting married abroad and expecting your quests to pay for flights and accommodation.
"Gender" reveals.
Baby showers.
"Proms" for junior school leavers.
"Push presents".

Who gives an F about whether these are the "done thing"?

40 years ago they didn't exist.

Lostmarbles2021 · 18/09/2021 17:57

Never heard of it.

AdaColeman · 18/09/2021 17:58

I wish I'd known about it, I would have asked for a diamond necklace! Wink

Whitefire · 18/09/2021 18:04

I had my first 15 years ago and my second 13 years ago, it was a thing then. I moaned at DH about wanting a present for number two.

He then arrived at 36 weeks, I had him in hospital with a special care cot on standby. I came home and read about women having to walk in labour to get to the hospital and it suddenly didn't seem important to have something given to me when I had been able to access maternity care easily. I made a donation instead.

shallIswim · 18/09/2021 18:11

Never heard of push presents.
I asked fir an eternity ring (well 4 diamonds to represent my little family) after being inheriting a ring I didn't like and a pair of weird diamond earrings. We took them to a jewellers who took them apart and made a classy ring. But it was in no way a reward for having babies. In any case my babies were in their twenties when we did this!

Lupinhere37 · 18/09/2021 18:31

I had an eternity ring on the day my DD was born. I was a bit underwhelmed, as I was in HDU with lines and tubes everywhere.
My DM told DH to take it home and wait until I was up to it.
Poor DH; I think he thought he’d done so well and then his carefully laid plan just fell apartGrin

JaninaDuszejko · 18/09/2021 18:35

I got a silk kimono dressing gown when DD1 was born. Nothing expensive for the other two but got flowers. Been married for 20 years and still don't have an eternity ring although I bought myself a piece of jewellery with the DCs birthstones in it a few years ago.

How much are you suppose to spend on an eternity ring if you are suppose to spend 1 months salary on an engagement ring do you think? I can't think of any of my friends with eternity rings though, susoect it's something that has gone out of fashion, or maybe I need to wait for our silver wedding anniversary.

OhRene · 18/09/2021 18:42

Gender reveals and baby showers made it over here HmmHmm. I'm not surprised push presents are a thing now.

That said, I'd read about it and told DH he needed to get me the iPhone 4S as a push present but it was kind of a joke as I was needing a new phone and was due one soon.

Turned out great cos we filmed DS's birth on it, where we incidentally had a gender reveal AND a baby shower at the same time. Okay, a baby pool not shower but the gas and air made it a funnier thing to me SmileGrin

SirChenjins · 18/09/2021 18:42

I’ve heard of an eternity ring being given but not labelled as a push present - that’s a revolting expression.

How much are you suppose to spend on an eternity ring if you are suppose to spend 1 months salary on an engagement ring do you think?

There’s nothing that says you’re expected to spend a month’s salary - except a ridiculous deBeers marketing campaign (which has now upped the ‘expectation’ to 3 months salary to take account of inflation!)

BeastOfBODMAS · 18/09/2021 18:45

They’ve just built a greggs across the road from my local maternity unit so I’ll be requesting a vegan steak bake from DH as my ‘push present’ Grin

Saoirse82 · 18/09/2021 18:55

@MistyFrequencies

I'm in Ireland. Art for first baby. A watch for the second. It was a thing for my husband more than me.
In Ireland too and not heard of this.
MistyFrequencies · 18/09/2021 18:58

Saoirse82 I did clarify later that I meant that's what I got, not that that was some Irish rule...but I see my first post read like that. I think amongst my friends rings are the most common.

Chachachawoo · 18/09/2021 18:59

It's a really gross phrase imo.
My husband v sweetly brought it up after baby 3 as it seemed to be more common and said baby was the biggest. I told him unless he was planning to buy me a 4kilo diamond, not to bother.

barneymcgroo · 18/09/2021 19:02

@ShowOfHands

I had mine by emcs so presumably didn't qualify. I did push for 4hrs but failed at the final hurdle so the only prize I got was a baby. And a packet of caramel chocolate digestives.
I'd say you qualify even more - I've had an ELCS and VBAC, and I know which one I'd rather have again. Recovery afterwards is no joke...!
Maray1967 · 18/09/2021 19:04

Wow I’m with the queen then as PP said Prince Philip brought roses and champagne, that’s what I got both times. Pink and white roses, my wedding flowers, and Mumm champagne.
My mum got her eternity ring on their 20th anniversary- I thought they were given on a significant anniversary not the birth of a child. Still waiting for mine though - may be at 30th?

binkydebonky · 18/09/2021 19:05

@Restinblue

Never heard of it
Me neither!
Noluthando · 18/09/2021 19:06

This is the first time I've heard of this practice

Cryalot2 · 18/09/2021 19:07

The words Push presents sound awful. Also rather unfair to those who have cesarean sections.
I got my babies, 1st was full term + and very poorly for a while. I got out of hospital without them and they were in scbu in a different hospital miles away.
We never knew what we were having as it was in the days before scans
I pushed to deliver my baby and placenta that was it. I chose to have my children and carrying and delivering them was how to have them so why a present?