To leave DS9 at home for about 45 minutes every week?

[HCPcourt]

DS is 9, 10 in Dec.

Last term my little one had swimming lessons every Thursday at the school they both attend. I would collect DS5 from reception, walk home, changed and give snack then walk back to school for 315 to collect DS9, give him house keys, he would walk home and let himself in. DH was WFH.

DH back in office now so options are

1. I collect DS5 at 3, home and change, back to school, collect DS9 at 315. He stays with us, DS5 swimming lesson until 4, home by five past.

2. I collect DS 5 at 3, home and change, DS9 let’s out at 315, walks himself back, he’s home by 320. We leave at 325 have lesson and back by 5 past 4.

We live a few metres from the school, with no roads to cross. School happy for year 5s to walk themselves home.

DS9 is very sensible and would just have some screen time until we got in. Any issues he could easily run round to school or indeed shout over the back fence. He would have the dog with him for a bit of company (no issues with being alone with the dog).

So AIBU to go for option 2?

Sounds fine to me.

Honestly, in that situation I would bring my older DC with me. Give him a snack, let him have the screen time at the pool or do some reading/homework or even have time for a chat while your younger DS is swimming.

No, far to young to be alone. Of course he should come with you.

@Melawati

Honestly, in that situation I would bring my older DC with me. Give him a snack, let him have the screen time at the pool or do some reading/homework or even have time for a chat while your younger DS is swimming.

This.

If you trust her then yes it's fine

I would let him stay at home.

@Melawati

Honestly, in that situation I would bring my older DC with me. Give him a snack, let him have the screen time at the pool or do some reading/homework or even have time for a chat while your younger DS is swimming.

I think this would be the best option. If he's just going to be on screens at home, then having him on screens next to you at swimming seems a better option as you can keep an eye on him.

I'd probably make him come with TBH but if your DS has asked if he can stay at home and is a sensible kid then I certainly wouldn't think it was terrible that you allowed him to.

I'm kind of laughing at myself thou, as at his age I used to walk my younger brother home from school (2miles) and two nights a week take him to football practice! My parents would usually collect us from football, but if they weren't there (bad traffic) we'd walk home too. I loved the freedom!

Is there a cafe in or near the pool? If so, I'd park him there with instructions to do his homework.

What I would like to know is how on earth you finish swimming at 4 and get DC5 dry and home in 5 minutes

I would be fine with that for my 9 nearly 10 yr old. He's sensible and like yours, would stay on screens the while time. I would set out a few rules though.

No cooking (microwave, kettle, toaster, oven, job)
no answering the door or the phone
no leaving the house unless it's on fire, which it won't be if you've followed rule 1!
no using daddy's tools or getting anything out of the garage
make sure he know where to go if he needs help.

We have a ring camera indoors and dd10 stays at home a couple of times a week while I walk the dog. I log into it and see what she's up to, talk to her on it, works great

Why not let older one walk home but then take him swimming? Or have I missed something?

Thanks for comments.
Those who think it’s too young, what sort of age would you be happy with?

No cafe, the pool is at their school.

@MiddlesexGirl I don’t know! Out, towel dried, into pants and shorts, t shirt and flip flops on and home? We live just a few metres from the school, it’s less than a minutes walk.

@SheWoreYellow could do in theory, but I would just be taking him straight back to the school to sit at swimming. Pool is next to his new classroom in fact.

Nope, I would take the nine year old with me. I had years of this, two children doing swimming lessons. I would have him sat with me at the swimming pool with a snack and a switch or reading book. What if he has an emergency at home? House fire, choking? You can’t expect the school to be responsible for him once he’s left for the day!

The problem with no one being at home is that if he doesn’t get home for whatever reason, it’s going to be an hour before you know.

No, he would be home before we left.

@SpringSparrow why would I expect school to be responsible for him?

I’d do it. What time will your DH get home from work if you got delayed at swimming, though. My DS went straight home from school on his own at that age while I took my younger DS to the park for an hour or so.

I think this is a perfect age to naturally build independence slowly and steadily.

I'd leave him if he's literally a minute away anyway

Your plan sounds absolutely fine.

DH not home until late. If I got delayed? I’m not sure I can envision a situation where I couldn’t get back to DS, he will only be about twenty metres from me. I can see the house from the pool.

Just noticed your update, the school is just a few metres away. I think this would be fine for a little independence. You could check in by phone a couple of times or even have him come for half the session to ease in if nervous

I would do it. You’re close by, not the other side of town. Can he message you to let you know he’s home or if he’s worried about anything?