Woke up to two grown men sleeping in my toddlers bedroom

[Mama1993]

They are friends btw and my toddler is with his g/parents.

However... This is the story...

We had some friends staying over last night who we haven't seen in a long time, they live abroad and wanted to see us before they caught a flight tomorrow. We have a sofa bed so no problem.

We had some drinks in our garden in the evening with a few other close friends - we are a group of about 8 and it was a proper catch up sort of thing. The plan was to then go to the pub for dinner around the corner.

side note: I have a four week old and am breastfeeding so I personally am not doing any heavy drinking.

I left the pub earlier than everyone but I said to my husband that I didn't mind if everyone wanted to come back for a drink or two (this is where I clearly went wrong)

To cut a long story short they ended up having a bit of a party downstairs, lots of drinking until late and lots of shouting. I'm not that annoyed about the loudness because it didn't actually keep me or my baby up

But when I woke up this morning I went in to my toddlers room to find our other friend (who has his own house in the same city) asleep on the floor and HIS friend who I don't know and only met the night before asleep in my son's bed!

My husband said they could so I can't be annoyed with them too much but AIBU to be annoyed with my husband?? I know I said they could all come back for a drink but we aren't students and I didnt expect that to be misconstrued as anyone can stay over....

I've been miffed this morning and my husband has just as rude back to me saying I should get off my high horse for doing the glasses before him etc... Maybe he has a point? I just think it's a bit inappropriate seeing as we have a newborn...

Was your toddler in there? I would hit the fucking roof.

Sorry, just reread. In that case I would still be angry with your husband but less so.

@MiddleParking

Was your toddler in there? I would hit the fucking roof.

Opening line of OP - toddler is with his grandparents.

The toddler wasn’t there.

I would be a bit annoyed, but grateful that the noise hadn’t kept me and baby awake!

I’d tell him that next time I’d appreciate it if he didn’t allow that to happen. But move on, it’s done now.

@MiddleParking

Was your toddler in there? I would hit the fucking roof.

Says in the OP toddler was at the grandparents.

I’m not really sure what the problem is. Wash the bedding before tonight. Job done.

Wouldn't bother me as long as he did the cleaning up. I would keep it in the bank for the next time I had friends over and wanted a bit of a party

The toddler wasn't there so meh, although he should have told you they were staying. Get DH to change toddlers sheets etc today.

What do you mean about doing the glasses before him? Sorry if it’s obvious I’m just not following

Don’t see a problem at all.

He didn't disturb you or the newborn, it was unusual (I assume as friends from abroad) its been a crap year and you said he should come back (although it's his house as well I assume?)
Yabu

I don't see why this is a problem. You just need to get DH to change the sheets.

If your toddler wasn’t there it is not an issue.

Well your thread title is a bit sensationalist isn’t it?

Well I woke up before him and did the cleaning which he saw as being a bit passive aggressive and me being able to get on my high horse for doing so (probably true)

Agree, if the toddler was there I'd be unhappy, but they are people you know, they didn't disturb you and unless someone's asking you to make breakfast for them all, I'm not sure whether it warrants being more than a bit annoyed.

Impressed you hosted a party with a 4 week old though!

I wouldnt be thrilled but i dont think its the end of the world either. Id forget it now youve said your piece and get on with your day. I hope your husband is doing the clearing up

Yes I wouldn’t be happy to wake finding two men I wasn’t expecting to be in my house asleep in my toddlers room. Especially if one was an only just acquaintance.

Can people only stay with their friends if they’re students? Unless there’s a backstory then no I can’t see a problem with my partner’s friends staying over one night?

The issue was that my newborn is and I wasn't expecting such a party/random guy I don't really know staying over

Well I woke up before him and did the cleaning which he saw as being a bit passive aggressive and me being able to get on my high horse for doing so (probably true)

that’s the sort of things I do.

@Mama1993

Well I woke up before him and did the cleaning which he saw as being a bit passive aggressive and me being able to get on my high horse for doing so (probably true)

Yeah I'd have left that for him, he can't do it if you already have so can't really moan at him for that! Personally I'd say let me know if people are going to be staying over in our house.

What does having a newborn have to do with it if it didn't disturb you or the newborn? I don't understand?

DH must change bedding though and do any other tidying up. He needs to get them breakfast and get them on their way. I’d stay upstairs until it’s all been done otherwise you’ll end up doing coffee and toast for them.

I'd be very upset that a strange , drunk man slept in my small child's bed.

Are you in the UK? The Covid issue would annoy me most of you are. It's spreading like wild fire. No chance would I want a load of randoms in my house when I have a toddler and vulnerable newborn baby.