Losing my temper/shit with selfish OH

[Idunnowhyibother]

Posting before I explode and say unsayable things in haste!
My partner of 9 months is lovely - loyal, sensitive and calm (any more laidback and he'd be sat on a cloud strumming a harp) but fucking HELL is he selfish!
I've got a failed marriage behind me so am not sure if my bastard-radar is broken or I don't trust myself anymore so I thought I'd see what you lot think :)
I work 3 jobs from home (he is looking for work after relocating to be with me) and cook/clean/shop and skivvy in general. I'm usually knackered at weekends and just want to flop or go to the hairdressers and just chill. But we are always going to see his friends (me being the taxi service as he doesn't drive). I don't drink/smoke anything funky so I feel like the boring sensible one that has to concentrate on not getting lost on the M5/Mwhatever as I'm a bit of a nervy and slightly crap driver after he has had a wicked time with his friends. He buggers off on a Friday to stay with friends and I just catch up on sleep before picking him up the next day. Then another friend will come down on Sunday and around we go. He knows I work like a dog and am stressed from saving up for a house so I'm getting to the point of no return with frustration at having no 'me' time. I get the feeling he prefers being at his friends (one in particular I really dislike as he is rude and very arrogant towards women)
I'm too bloody old to go through shit like this and am trying to resist pressing the detonate button. It would make a nice explosion but sound like a wet fart after all is said and done! Do I push the buzzer on him?? Or AIBU?
Oh and sorry for the rant. I do want advice :)

He doesn't know how?

To what? Get a job? Use a hoover? Wash a plate? Put something in the oven? Pay a bill? Use a washing machine?

He's having a laugh.

@IveGotASongThatllGetOnYNerves. Yep, you got that right. He’s also having a lovely time !!

Just imagine if a mate said “I like Jayden but all I do is drive him round to his mates so he can drink/smoke scratch his balls all evening” What would you say? Oh and he’s also a lazy bastard and let’s me work 3 jobs and then drive him.....
You deserve better and you need someone who is working as hard as you and wants to be with you to do stuff together you both like and so you can relax in your free time.

Sorry just read he is out the door! I hope you can start enjoying your free time this weekend and doing exactly as you fancy. Sometimes the shitty behaviour creeps up it’s not always easy to see so don’t give yourself grief about it.

If you’ve only been with him for 9 months and you’ve gone through rehab in that time it sounds like it’s far too early for you to be getting into a new relationship. You need to be focusing on yourself at the moment.

English is his 3rd language , how are you having a relationship of talking, sharing thoughts etc.
9 months and he's moved in and was long distance before that.
You're early on in your recovery.
He takes drugs, drinks by the sound of it.
Why are you with someone who does exactly what you're trying to not do, doesn't work, pull his weight and you can't communicate properly with ?
You need time on your own. Be strong on your own then look for a relationship

@Idunnowhyibother

Am now sat here on my own. I calmly told him that our (lack of) partnership was totally unacceptable and that I'm not his fucking mother/cook/skivvy/taxi/fuckbuddy/doormat. Didn't lose my temper but looked him in the eye and told him he was disrespectful and using me like a Pro. He is totally gutted blah blah will do anything. Wants to contribute and support me but is lost as how to do it. English is his third language but he got the gist. Someone mentioned his past and this is first serious relationship for him. Maybe that says a lot....

Wants to contribute? That's easy - half the cooking / cleaning / shopping. And with no reminders from you. If he can't do that, he's out... I doubt he'll make it through a week of actually pulling his weight.

And start doing what you want to do at weekends. If he wants to see friends, he'll need to figure out the logistics himself.

...all of this is assuming the relationship is still on for now?

Omg you are not considering giving him the benefit of the doubt?

Each update makes him sound even worse.

Please just give him the boot.

You really sound like you've turned a corner and are on a path to some really good things. Don't let this man ruin all of that.

He is totally gutted blah blah will do anything.

Then tell him that what he has to do is piss off and don't bother to come back until he's grown up.

His crying is manipulation. He's got the life of Reilly. No job, no bills, a cook, cleaner, chauffeur all while watching you work 3 jobs. There's nothing loving or kind about him. Get rid.

Push. The. Button.

Good luck and sending strength.

It doesn't sound like you have ended it. What hell do now is just enough to persuade you to let him stay. Don't fall for it.

What he'll do...

Well done. You can have a relationship without living with them you know. I did it for years as I love living on my own.

How are you Idunnowhyibother?