Family party and the unvaccinated

[JanetPondersley]

My immediate family are throwing a medium sized, outdoor, family party to celebrate all the celebrations we have missed over the last 18 months.

All the Aunts, Uncles, Cousins etc we are close to are invited, along with some close family friends.

We have always been close to one particular cousin and her family. Me and my siblings are close in age to her and her siblings.

The issue is, this particular cousin and her husband are refusing to have the vaccine. I unfriended them a while ago on facebook as the husband likes to share delightful 'patriotic' memes (which is a whole other story), and the husband has fallen hook, line and sinker for all the anti mask / anti vax rhetoric. He calls face masks face nappies and muzzles. (insert the biggest eyeroll you can imagine here)

There will be a number of unvaccinated children there, including a new born who will be somewhere around a month old then. Also a friend who is unable to be vaccinated, so as a family we have decided that we won't be inviting the cousin due to choosing not to be vaccinated.

This has obviously led to drama. Personally, I couldn't care less. If people want to refuse to come because we haven't invited this cousin, they are welcome to not come. But it's really upset my mum, who is elderly and had a shittier than average past 18 months. She wants me and my siblings to back down and keep the peace.

AIBU to stick to our guns and not invite the cousin?

I’d suggest that everyone does a LFT before the event if you’ve got someone CEV who can’t be vaccinated attending. People who have had both jabs are catching this delta variant, so it’s no guarantee

YABU. You should invite them. If you’ve all had the vaccine, what’s the issue? I know the friend hasn’t, but she’s going to regularly come into contact with unvaccinated people and she can’t expect them to hide away.

Maybe The Unvaccinated could wear bells and say 'Unclean'?

I always wonder, how do people who refuse to mix with unvaccinated people know they people aren't just saying they're vaccinated to avoid drama?
It's a genuine question, I think everyone has the right to choose whether to have it or not, and others have the right to choose with whom they socialise, but if you aren't in a venue which requires proof, you're relying on people's honesty. So you could be mixing with unvaccinated people anyway.

I don't mind if people are vaccinated or not personally, but in this situation I'd invite the cousin and ask them to do a test beforehand if it's an issue.

Honestly invite who you want if people are miffed then that's up to them isn't it? I wouldn't get het up with unvaccinated people I do get her up about anti maskers and covid deniers that is what would be the decider for me having unvacinated people around children isn't that dangerous.

Everyone does a lateral flow test on the day of the party, kids included. Sorted.

I think you should cut to the chase, go round to the unclean bastards' house and brutally slaughter them.
or use a bit of common sense and calm down with your hysteria, whichever you prefer

I don’t understand. Them being unvaccinated means they are more likely to have more severe symptoms if they catch covid. The vaccination does not prevent you catching or transmitting it. Any one of the vaccinated people at the party could spread it to children/CEV and are possibly more likely to as their symptoms won’t be as severe as someone who is unvaccinated.
LFTs need to be done by everyone.

Are you not inviting them because you think their vaccination status is a genuine risk or because you think that they are dicks that you don’t want to spend time with?

Second one is perfectly reasonable btw!

Sibling has requested LFT's are done the morning of the party.

My eldest sibling is also, I think, really hurt that the cousin isn't thinking of anyone else when it comes to the vaccine.

Personally, I find the husband so obnoxious that I wouldn't miss him being there at all! Think mansplainer from hell!

And all having had the vaccine isn't really the point. eg, I have had AZ which is showing much less effective against Delta.

I also presume the husband at least will also refuse to wear a mask when getting food.

If by “patriotic” memes you men the husband is a racist twat, that’s the reason I’d not be inviting them anywhere ever tbh

@Mumoftwoinprimary

Because we think they are dicks, basically! ;)

What’s the issue? If they’re unvaccinated they’re the ones at (a small!) risk. Vaccinated people can still catch and transmit covid.

Just because they are unvaccinated doesnt automatically mean they have Covid
Vaccinated people , like me , can still contract covid
Yabu
Sounds more like you disagree with their life choices rather than you ' protecting ' the CEV
I don't automatically go around asking everyone I have round if they've been vaccinated it's none of my business and if someone invited me to their house and asked if I were vaccinated I'd tell them to mind their own fucking business.

I'd do a LF test before going

I think yanbu, due to having someone who can't be vaccinated

Wether you choose to vaccinate or not, is entirely your own choice. But how people want to interact with you afterwards is their choice.

My kids dad has stopped speaking to several people, because they had the vaccine. Its really up to him.

@Wigglegiggle0520

The vaccine vastly reduces your chances of catching and transmitting it.

But as I mention above, it's more the principle of the thing. He is happy to drink 'off the back of a lorry' vodka, but clutches his handbag and mentions his human rights when it comes to a perfectly tested vaccine.

Not unreasonable. Not because of them being unvaccinated but because of the reasons behind that. Why would you want to entertain people stupid and selfish enough to fall down the fake news rabbit hole?

Never understood how people using 'face nappy' and 'muzzle' as terms for masks don't realise how hard they are owning themselves (yes, childish term but I can't think of another right now). If you talk shit and attack people unprovoked, then yes, you should be obliged to use those items!

@Coldilox I once pulled him up on the blatant lies he was believing and sharing ("illegal immigrants given 20 bedroom homes and £60k a year" type meme) , and this over 50 year old man rang my elderly mum to get her to speak to me about my bullying of him (I responded with basic facts. Such as, if they're illegal, they get nothing, because, er, they're illegal!)

That's so unfair. I have chosen not to be vaccinated and should not be discriminated against because of my choice! Like others have said, LFTs are available so let everyone test themselves before they arrive. YABU!

OMG is this what the bloody world has come to?!

Then don’t invite him because he’s a twat. That’s perfectly reasonable

You're conflating two distinct issues here. This man is a racist and if you don't want to invite him for his racist views, few would disagree with you. But not inviting them because they're making a choice not to get vaccinated is not on. We still get to choose what we do with our own bodies whether you like it or not.

The vaccine vastly reduces your chances of catching and transmitting it.

Whilst that was true of earlier variants, it's proving to be far less the case with the current dominant variant.

Welcome to the future.

Unless your unvaccinated friend plans on never attending any social event ever without knowing the vaccination status of every other person, this is going to be the reality for everyone.

You would not be unreasonable to not invite him because he's a prick though.