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Original poster

Dp night out, I don't want him to go

376 replies

Summerdaysx · 29/06/2021 21:33

NC for this as I am a regular poster.

Dp has a night out planned for Saturday.

A few things are bugging me,

We have so much extra to pay for this month and just simply cannot afford it.

His friends are all talking about "getting the pussy" "going to lap dancing clubs".

He will be out until god knows what time and expect me to pick him up, I have a child.

Now I am in no way going to tell him "he's not going"

But what can I do? He will still go anyway no matter what I say!

I wish he would have to isolate for 10 days .

I simply cannot be bothered with all the arguing about it.

He will just say we will get by with money "we always do". He honestly has an answer for everything.

OP posts:
Whatabouttery · 29/06/2021 21:36

I wouldn't begrudge a night out unless it meant going without essentials.

But if I heard 'getting the pussy' and he was going to lap dancing clubs I'd change the locks on his way out.

nimbuscloud · 29/06/2021 21:37

Are his friends single?

floatingboater · 29/06/2021 21:38

So is he expecting you to wake the child up to go and play taxi?

spotcheck · 29/06/2021 21:39

He's going to a lap dancing club?

And wants to spend money you can't afford on lap dancers?

Of course you can't tell him he can't go, but God, that would put me off him. Irresponsible and misogynistic - yeech

Twilow · 29/06/2021 21:39

Yuck. Lock the door, tell him to take a key and get a taxi. But why are you with him, those things sound disgusting.

mynameisbrian · 29/06/2021 21:39

Why would you be having to pick him up? It sounds he is planning a late one and I certainly wouldnt be getting up during the night to pick him up. He sounds selfish. If you cannot afford it why is he going? Why cant you say anything to him?
Is the DC his?

AnyFucker · 29/06/2021 21:39

In your situation I would not discourage him from going

But he wouldn’t be coming back

Maggiesfarm · 29/06/2021 21:40

@Whatabouttery

I wouldn't begrudge a night out unless it meant going without essentials.

But if I heard 'getting the pussy' and he was going to lap dancing clubs I'd change the locks on his way out.

Me too.

How old is he, 19?

Yeuch.

MattHancocksSexTape · 29/06/2021 21:41

Well adult entertainment venues aren’t open until the restrictions are lifted…

Natty13 · 29/06/2021 21:41

Never mind covid it's syphilis I'd be worried about him bringing back from his "night out"

billy1966 · 29/06/2021 21:41

Is it not his child?

And I agree with above, if I heard my partner speaking about women like that, I wouldn't want to be with him.

VettiyaIruken · 29/06/2021 21:41

Don't go and pick him up. That's ridiculous. You should tell him now that he needs to make his own way home in future because you are done with taking your child out in the middle of the night to be his taxi.

Tiramiwho · 29/06/2021 21:41

How old is your child? Do you have to take them with you when you collect him? He needs to get a Taxi if so.

Hankunamatata · 29/06/2021 21:42

Where is the money going to come from op?

I'd be telling him there will be no picks ups and to sleep on the sofa so not to wake you.

OhWhyNot · 29/06/2021 21:43

You have boundaries in yourself relationship

Some are fine with their partner spitting their social life before things needed in the home others are not

Some are fine with their partners going to stripe clubs others are not

If you are not then you have to make that clear and stick by it. It’s not about controlling him it’s about what you find acceptable

ladygracie · 29/06/2021 21:44

Why would you pick him up? You can definitely say no to doing that.

Giraffe11 · 29/06/2021 21:44

Tell him you aren’t happy if he is going out to lap dancing clubs etc and that wherever he is going , you certainly are certainly not picking him up.

DontDrinkDontSmokeWhatDoIDo · 29/06/2021 21:46

@Summerdaysx

NC for this as I am a regular poster.

Dp has a night out planned for Saturday.

A few things are bugging me,

We have so much extra to pay for this month and just simply cannot afford it.

His friends are all talking about "getting the pussy" "going to lap dancing clubs".

He will be out until god knows what time and expect me to pick him up, I have a child.

Now I am in no way going to tell him "he's not going"

But what can I do? He will still go anyway no matter what I say!

I wish he would have to isolate for 10 days .

I simply cannot be bothered with all the arguing about it.

He will just say we will get by with money "we always do". He honestly has an answer for everything.

How have you heard his friends talk like that, OP?

Sounds like a strange thing to overhear.

Deathgrip · 29/06/2021 21:48

Quite the catch, isn’t he?

shouldistop · 29/06/2021 21:49

Where are you that lap dancing clubs are open?

CrunchyKnot · 29/06/2021 21:57

@AnyFucker

In your situation I would not discourage him from going

But he wouldn’t be coming back

👆
Howcanthisbe123 · 29/06/2021 22:01

It wouldn’t bother me, but you would have to drag me through a freezing hell before I woke my child up to go get daddy from a night out! He can walk or get a cab!!

beigebrownblue · 29/06/2021 22:02

Oh my God love. Just change the fucking locks and divorce.

Shit, you are really putting up with partner doing lap dancing etc.

Where the fuck is your self respect hon?

Really?

Change the locks

let him go out and have it lined up

change the locks love

Anyusernameleft · 29/06/2021 22:02

Whatever about his v poor entertainment choices & what you are prepared to overlook on that score, he should have a budget given your financial circumstances which should include a taxi fare. No way would I be collecting him, I'd tell him def he cannot rely on me (esp with a child asleep also) & my ph will be on silent/off. And then put it on silent or turn it off.

StressyWoman · 29/06/2021 22:04

Is he friends with Jay from Inbetweeners?