Huge row with sister on holiday

[Honey12346]

I'm on holiday with sister and cousin and we are going today to a small cute little island to spend two nights there. I have booked us a rent a car for this that I have paid (I can afford it) to make our lives easier, rather than taking the bus...

My cousin has went to pick up the car as she is driving and they asked for a security deposit that she cannot afford. She called my sister and I overheard the conversation. Instead of asking me if I can pay for the security deposit they started discussing can they cancel the car etc. So basically acting as if I'm not going on this trip, not even asking for my input. When I could solve this problem in 2 seconds as I can afford the deposit!

Then I overheard my sister saying the fact that I even booked this car was stressful for her???

So let me get this straight, I have booked and paid for a car and my cousin is driving. All my sister literally has to do is sit in the car and this is stressful for her???

I ran out after hearing this and I am now sitting in a park crying. My sister is calling me.

Yabu - I did something wrong
Yanbu - my sister is being a bitch

I have to say people guessing that all 3 of us are in our teens and going on our first holiday is so funny considering I know hold old we actually are and how many holidays we have been on lol. It kind of makes me feel better after all this drama

I don’t think is something to find funny

@Honey12346

I have to say people guessing that all 3 of us are in our teens and going on our first holiday is so funny considering I know hold old we actually are and how many holidays we have been on lol. It kind of makes me feel better after all this drama

It makes you feel better that people presume, from your behaviour, that you are teenagers? You think immaturity is desirable? It doesn't mean you look young, it means you are in a state of arrested development.

“I'm a bit surprised you're old enough to be able to hire a car if your response to this was to 'run outside and cry'.“

Mean and unnecessary.

Sorry this happened OP. Sounds like you’re better off without them, on this holiday and the next.

Oh fgs nobody has treated you like crap 🙄 grow up. I’d have bloody left without you too, creating all this drama!

@AmberIsACertainty

’FYI OP hire cars are stressful. They don't feel like your usual car to drive, takes a day or two to get used to them and driving feels more stressful during that time’

Not stressful enough for them not to take the car and drive away without OP.

Some people seem to spend their lifes feeling sorry for themselves and blaming others. OP you did the right thing to leave, and in the future please decide how you let people treat you.

I think part of the issue is you booked the car without checking if they wanted to be in a hire car - you booked it because you can afford it. I went travelling with my sister - we both could afford hire cars but she wanted part of the travel experience to be doing what the locals do including catching buses and trains. My sister would have also hated being in a hire car. Sometimes people also get offended if you book and pay for things ie highlighting your wealth and the fact they can't afford things.

All sounds like there's a backstory and all a bit daft. But general rule, 2 out of 3 votes wins and maybe they didn't want the car. You might have seen it as a good thing you could pay for but they might not have. Think you need to pack in the sisters holidays... sisters holidays with one other person is a recipe for disaster

Have you left op? Where have you gone?

You need to be clearer when it comes to booking things out of their price range.

Who are all these people going on holiday

Not read all PPs but what you should be worried about is whether you checked for and took photos of any marks or scratches on the car before you took it out of the hire or you might find you get charged for the repair.

I agree with a pp that you probably annoyed your cousin by essentially hiring her as an unpaid taxi driver and then she was faced with the deposit.

Maybe your sister didn't ask you for the deposit because she thought you couldn't afford it? I don't know. I think the running and crying was extreme. However, I couldn't forgive my sister for driving off on holiday and leaving me behind. All she had to do was come and get you and talk about it. Doesn't seem like a good sister.

Just idly wondering about this from the PoV of the sister & cousin 'My sister is a bit of a drama queen & princess, but we all get along quite well, and often go on holiday together. This time we agreed we'd spend some of our week visiting an island near our base, but the only transport options were either hiring a car or getting a bus. We both agreed we'd prefer to take the bus so that cousin can have a drink & not be too stressed about driving, but my sister insisted on hiring a car for my cousin to drive, waving away our protests because 'she can afford it!' which wasn't really the point... Then when it was time to collect the car, she sent cousin, even though the booking & payment were in her name. This was a massive hassle for us, and meant we lost a big chunk of our day, especially as sister wasn't there to authorise the deposit payment. Cousin & I had a bit of a moan about it, and said 'shall we just get the bus?' Sister overheard, totally flipped her lid, shouted at me, stormed out in tears. We have to leave in the next hour to get to our booked accommodation, but my sister hasn't come back and isn't answering her phone. She knows where we'll be, but is refusing to let us know whether she'll join us or not. WWYD?'

@sadeyedladyofthelowlandsea but they happily took the car and drove off.

Also I think OP's a drama queen but why would they take the car that she paid for anyway even if she was?
I'd certainly if I was her contact bank and get them to cancel payment.
Unless there's a reason cousing went to pick upcare alone (e.g. it was nearer her etc)

@Macncheeseballs

Who are all these people going on holiday

Well, the OP, her sister and her cousin.

And I'm going on holiday on Monday. Can't wait

@LateAtTate Presumably the car had been paid for, and would have been non-refundable if the person paying wasn't there to authorise the cancellation? I don't know, I'm just assuming. Sister & cousin weren't to know the OP would ignore their calls when they were trying to find out where she was and what to do next. You'll note she didn't actually say what she shouted at her sister before she flounced out to the park. For all we know she could have said 'take the fucking car yourselves then, I'm going home!' In which case, I would have taken the car.

They shouldn’t of left without you that’s really low.

I’m not sure how they treated you like crap before this though? Just talking about the car isn’t really treating you like crap. There must be a backstory here.

Because they didn't speak with me to try to resolve it, they were just resolving it amongst themselves as if I don't exist. That was the hurtful thing that made me cry

You provided a 'treat' involving someone else driving you around a small cute little island? Maybe the designated driver would rather sit back on the bus and look at the scenery instead of watching the road and playing chauffeur to you?

Grown adults resolving a matter among themselves instead of swinging it past you makes you cry? Maybe they had already hinted that the car arrangement wasn't one they wanted, but you ploughed ahead because you don't like the bus?

They have punished you by taking off without you.

You have punished them by radio silence, manipulative tears, and are planning a disappearing act. Do you need attention so badly that you are prepared to stoop to the juvenile 'they'll miss me when I'm gone' tactics?

This all sounds a little controlling on your part.

This is OTT , she is your sister . Speak to her , you are all Adults?

The back story is that's how my sister has been treating me my whole life, always talking about me as if I'm not there and ignoring me

So why on earth go on holiday with her?

OP has not replied about age. They’re all clearly very young.

This is so dramatic.

OP also hasn't said what she shouted at them as she ran out the door crying. Clearly it was bad enough for them to leave her behind so perhaps she ought to reflect that on what she said.

It really doesn’t follow that they’re necessarily all that young. (The OP laughed at the suggestion that they were teenagers.) Maturity also isn’t necessarily defined in years, as is amply demonstrated on numerous MN threads.

Also, one of the most common insults on here is, ‘You must be very young.’

If you paid for the car it seems odd for you not to collect it and drive it. It sounds as though you don't like each other much. Families can get stuck in roles they should have grown out of when they spend too much time together. It sounds as though you and your sister have never learned to disagree and discuss stuff like adults and run away to cry or drive off stranding someone if you disagree. It sounds as though you had a long cry if they had time to pack the car for a 2 day trip and leave