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AIBU?

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Original poster

Huge row with sister on holiday

221 replies

Honey12346 · 23/06/2021 15:45

I'm on holiday with sister and cousin and we are going today to a small cute little island to spend two nights there. I have booked us a rent a car for this that I have paid (I can afford it) to make our lives easier, rather than taking the bus...

My cousin has went to pick up the car as she is driving and they asked for a security deposit that she cannot afford. She called my sister and I overheard the conversation. Instead of asking me if I can pay for the security deposit they started discussing can they cancel the car etc. So basically acting as if I'm not going on this trip, not even asking for my input. When I could solve this problem in 2 seconds as I can afford the deposit!

Then I overheard my sister saying the fact that I even booked this car was stressful for her???

So let me get this straight, I have booked and paid for a car and my cousin is driving. All my sister literally has to do is sit in the car and this is stressful for her???

I ran out after hearing this and I am now sitting in a park crying. My sister is calling me.

Yabu - I did something wrong
Yanbu - my sister is being a bitch

OP posts:
Birkie248 · 23/06/2021 15:59

You all just need to communicate better. Stop crying in the park and go back and sort it!
I wouldn’t be happy if someone nominated me as driver somewhere I didn’t live / know, so maybe it’s that?

veeeeh · 23/06/2021 15:59

Discuss, agree, then pay.

Why are you not driving the car yourself? I hate driving when on hols myself, and if I need to get somewhere I take a taxi or we get a driver for the day. Often works out very economical and you can just sit back and enjoy.

But there appears to be more to this story anyway.

JesusWeptonaBike · 23/06/2021 16:00

Your sister is a dick and you need to get a grip.

Aprilx · 23/06/2021 16:01

I don’t know why your sister is stressed unless she feels bad for you cousin who you have not only designated as driver but have sent her off by herself to pick up the car with no means of paying the deposit. (You know they always want this right?)

You running out and crying is infantile.

L123A · 23/06/2021 16:01

Wow -if something so simple causes so much stress I’d suggest you holiday with other people.

bigbaggyeyes · 23/06/2021 16:01

Your sister is being an idiot. Great that you'll now all end up on public transport with everything that needs taking for a few days .

Original poster
Honey12346 · 23/06/2021 16:03

@L123A

Wow -if something so simple causes so much stress I’d suggest you holiday with other people.
I'm starting to realize this too
OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 23/06/2021 16:05

I ran out after hearing this and I am now sitting in a park crying.

Instead of discussing it like an adult you ran off to the park to cry like a child. Fucking hell, the drama. Your sister and cousin weren't right, but your reaction was utter ridiculous.

HollyGarland · 23/06/2021 16:07

This all seems so needlessly dramatic. I can’t understand how something so simple to resolve turned into a fight at all.

Original poster
Honey12346 · 23/06/2021 16:10

@HollyGarland

This all seems so needlessly dramatic. I can’t understand how something so simple to resolve turned into a fight at all.
Because they didn't speak with me to try to resolve it, they were just resolving it amongst themselves as if I don't exist. That was the hurtful thing that made me cry
OP posts:
Seesawmummadaw · 23/06/2021 16:10

It’s a bit…. Much Confused
It’s a non thing.

cupsofcoffee · 23/06/2021 16:12

Why didn't you speak up and say something?

I don't understand why you just ran off crying?

thisplaceisweird · 23/06/2021 16:14

Because they didn't speak with me to try to resolve it, they were just resolving it amongst themselves as if I don't exist well you weren't there???? They were sorting it out in the moment.

  1. don't go ok holiday with them
  2. grow up
cupcakecourageous · 23/06/2021 16:15

Have you 'taken over' planning and always get your way because you play for things they can't afford?

This is their holiday too.

And as for running out and crying in the car...you sound like very hard work!

Smartiepants79 · 23/06/2021 16:15

This is all so weird.
They’re being a bit weird by ignoring you and trying to cancel the car you’d pay for.
And running out crying is also a bit weird.
Just assert yourself and get it done!

KeepingTrack · 23/06/2021 16:15

So e people need to RTFT as the OP has already answered many of the questions…..

KeepingTrack · 23/06/2021 16:20

@Honey12346 I’m guessing there is some other stuff going on in the background.

It sounds slike it was the last straw that broke the camel’s back.

FWIW, the only person that should cancel the car is the one who booked it, Aka you.
They should have listened to you rather than ignore you. And include you in the discussion as you are travelling together and booked the car.

Having said that, as you are in your car crying. Start by taking a few deep breath in. Put some music on and find your bearings again.
Speak to your dsis and see what is now the end of the conversation. Did they actually cancel the car?

Start being assertive and tell them again what you said. That you are happy to pay the deposit (it’s usually only ‘set aside’ a CC rather than paid anyway).
Then remind them that you are ravelling together and you’d like them to take the decisions WITH you.

But you need to stay and speak with them…

rwalker · 23/06/2021 16:21

From your sisters point of view it can be quite humiliating when you can't pay for things and somebody comes charging in with there purse to pay for everything it's not a nice feeling .

RichPetunia · 23/06/2021 16:22

Do you think your sister and cousin could have been embarrassed at having to approach you for more money?

Maddox33 · 23/06/2021 16:24

Fuck off on your own and leave the pair of them to it.

Or ring a friend and invite her on a spontaneous getaway if you can't face the idea of holidaying alone.

I'd love it, lots of walking, reading, treating myself to nice meals and a couple of bottles of wine.

Life is too short for this kind of drama.

Original poster
Honey12346 · 23/06/2021 16:24

@cupcakecourageous

Have you 'taken over' planning and always get your way because you play for things they can't afford?

This is their holiday too.

And as for running out and crying in the car...you sound like very hard work!

Honestly no, this is the first time this happened. We always agree on things and the price before we book. And it's not like I rented this car and told them to cough up the money, I told them it's my treat!
OP posts:
FunMcCool · 23/06/2021 16:26

You're both being ridiculous. Why didn't you just say to your sister "oh I'll pay the deposit"...

Yep agree with this. Why all the drama!?

SchadenfreudePersonified · 23/06/2021 16:33

Did you ask your cousin if she was happy to do the driving? Maybe she finds driving abroad stressful.

AdelindSchade · 23/06/2021 16:37

It's easy to revert to childish ways of behaving with siblings and family. Buried resentments can resurface. So I assume there is more to this. But presumably you all like each other if you wanted to spend time together so try to make peace OP and calm the drama.

Rhubarbfizzles · 23/06/2021 16:40

Honestly if there is nothing else going on get out your car, speak to them calmly, move on and have a lovely holiday Smile

Life’s too short!

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