husband got back at half 5 this morning

[bubblegum02]

hello,

based on some of the threads on here, I'm assuming I'm going to get a lot of kill joy comments and the fact it's the euros too but I am annoyed.

my partner said he was going for a "couple" last night. I am 4 months pregnant and we have a one year old. I went to bed at about 10 and heard him come in. when I looked at the time, expecting it to be about half 11 as the pubs round here are still shutting earlier than usual it was half 5!

what has pissed me off about this is, one year old has woken up at 7, we went down about half 7 and of course, he is totally dead to the world. he has slept in our spare room downstairs which is something I suppose.

he was meant to be looking after the one year old for me whilst I go out for lunch today but he isnt responding to me at all. or the one year old.

he was out all day for the game last sunday too, was out pretty much the whole of the bank holiday and last Saturday too.

I'm getting fed up now, I'm not going to be able to leave the one year old with him, it is like he is unconscious and I'm meant to be going at 11.

not cool - pre kids, it wouldnt of been an issue but think he needs to grow up a bit. not against having a bit of fun but rocking in at that time when you are supposed to be looking after your child the next day is taking the piss.

has ruined my day too now and he will inevitably be feeling very sorry for himself.

YANBU
he’s going to ruin your plans. Does he do that a lot?

You need a strong word with him

Put a really loud alarm next to his head and force him up.

Just get him up. Remind him you are going out and go.

And where was he till this time?

Has he done this before or is it just a one off?

I'd be livid but that's me.

YANBU, firstly it was inconsiderate to stay so late without lettig you know but secondly he's now tuining your plans for the day.

Very, very selfish. Nothing wrong with him having a good night but not when it impacts the whole family. Is there noone else who can have the baby for you so you can still go? I wouldnt leave my child with him but I would absolutely make him pay for it.

Wake him up at 9.30am, he should be together enough for you to go

his alarm has been going off since about 7 as he sometimes works Saturdays and has forgotten to turn it off. this is how I know he must of been in an absolute state to be sleeping through it all. I've tried speaking to him, the one year old has run in there saying dada and he is out cold. fat lot of use he is going to be today.

I'm just upset because it's the first time I will have been somewhere in ages. he doesn't stay out until half 5 often, but he went out all day last sunday for the football, the bank holiday weekend he was out all Saturday and Sunday and the weekend before that was his friends birthday which he was out for. so it's been nearly every weekend for the last month, although he came in about 1 in the morning on those occasions.

You can go out. Wake him up at 930. The hangover whilst looking after a baby will show him his mistake. He made a commitment to you and as long as he keeps it hasn't done anything wrong. It's his own stupid fault he's going to suffer

You wake him up in a couple of hours with a strong coffee, tell him to man the fuck up and you go out.

Please don't let it ruin your day. He is a parent and will have to deal with the consequences of his late night. It is completely unacceptable. Wake him up and give him no choice. Water over his head should help if he absolutely refuses. You have every right to be angry.

Mm I think it would depend for me how often he does this kind of thing? If it’s a once in a blue moon happening, then I’d probably let it go, but he would absolutely be woken to look after the 1yo while I went out. My plans wouldn’t be changing.
If this is happening often, then I’d be rethinking whether someone who behaves this way regularly is a suitable role model for my children.

Unless this happens regularly I wouldn't be bothered at all and unlike all of MN I actually think it's fine for adults to have a proper night out every once in a blue moon!

Still go! If he gets up at 10:30 that’s 5.5 hrs sleep which is enough and he’ll have to deal with his tiredness
Don’t let him win

DH used to do this once every couple of months. If find him asleep slumped over the kitchen table, sofa or, once memorably, the bathroom floor. Incredibly annoying, as you say he was pretty much out of the loop to spend time with the kids that day. I let it go because it was relatively infrequent.

It’s still early, you should get ready still and he has to get up and suffer through it. Don’t let him ruin your day with his selfishness.

Of course you can go out. It’s only 7:45 he’ll be fine by 11 surely. It’s not fun looking after a one year old with a hangover but he’ll manage.

@Posieandpip

Unless this happens regularly I wouldn't be bothered at all and unlike all of MN I actually think it's fine for adults to have a proper night out every once in a blue moon!

okay I suppose it's okay for my day to be ruined though to accommodate?

Twat is all I can say. He is a Twat

I would wake him a 10 with a cold wet flannel round the face

he is going to be in an absolute vile mood. he cant cope with hangovers.

You can and should still go out.

Why are you trying to get him up now if you're not leaving until 11?

I would let him sleep until 10 and then wake him up, tell him you're leaving in an hour and suggest he has a shower now before you go. He is an adult, he knows he had responsibilities today, tough luck if he feels rank!