Shall I complain or just leave it?

[LemonsAreSour]

I'm possibly being sensitive, hormonal and really stressed about this whole situation. However, this incident did actually upset me and I'm mortified.

I had a miscarriage two weeks ago, but today I had an appointment (large global chain store) on the high street. I thought I'd go and enjoy the sunshine.

I had some culotte shorts on and I never in a million years expected what happened next

Had my appointment and was sat in the room after and I felt blood pouring out of me. I tried to get out the room quickly but as I stood up, the blood began streaming down my legs. I was stood holding my vagina whilst asking to use the toilet. I was told no, but I could use the restaurant over the road or some public ones. We had a bit of back & forth debate, I was still told no I cannot use the toilet. I told him I'd had a miscarriage and needed it ASAP.

He went off for 5 minutes and I really needed help by this point so I came out of the room and asked another customer to ask for another member of staff. The customer was lovely and offered To call an ambulance and asked if I was ok etc. At this point another member of staff came over but repeated the same as the first - I cannot use the toilet but gave me directions to the public one! I told him I’d had a miscarriage, I cannot walk over there in front of everyone and I was getting quite upset. I’m not sure what happened after then but a lovely female member of staff escorted me to the toilet and waited with me until DP came.

I guess eventually I did get to the toilet but why did it take so much drama to be allowed? What if it was an elderly or disabled person? It was humiliating stood there with blood pouring out of my shorts.

I guess they’ll just blame COVID but I’m really angry.

@foxyariel

Hi OP, I think I would write to the company to first of all thank the female member of staff who was so kind. Then I would mention the way the male member of staff dealt with your emergency and how much distress it caused you. Suggest they need to revisit their staff training. I'm sorry for your loss

I agree with this. I would also urge you to be checked out medically, if you haven't already - I've had a number of miscarriages, only two without ERPCs, but that doesn't sound right.

What a horrible thing to happen. I agree that you really must complain about your treatment- how utterly barbaric, however, might I suggest that you take the opportunity to also praise the lovely female member of staff for helping you- I'm sure you did at the time, but management should also be aware of her going her going above and beyond for you.
I hope you are recovering as well as you can.

That sounds so awful, people are idiots I hope you’re ok

Dear god, that's awful! Name and shame the company OP!

I think I would write to the company to first of all thank the female member of staff who was so kind. Then I would mention the way the male member of staff dealt with your emergency and how much distress it caused you.

This

I'm so sorry that this happened to you, it's times like this when rules go out of the window and basic human decency comes in, appalling treatment, I'd absolutely complain when you feel well enough to do so

I'm so sorry this has happened to you op it is disgraceful as someone else has said. I hope you are ok and you should absolutely complain.

What they have put you through is absolutely disgusting. I'm so sorry.

God I’m so sorry. That’s horrific. Where is the compassion and empathy. I would complain, I would write to the ceo, I would plaster it all over social media. That’s absolutely horrendous. I hope you’re ok💐

No surprise the two men thought it was acceptable to send you on your way but the female did the right thing!

Agree with @forensicfleabag, praise the good one but definitely complain about the crap ones. If management do eff all or use covid as an excuse, don't be afraid to go on social media, no global chain is going to want people to think this is how they treat a medical emergency.

for you OP

You should absolutely complain.
If it was a bank / building society there may be strict rules for not allowing members of the public into non public areas including the toilet. Potential access to confidential data / systems. So the members of staff may have been worried about possible consequences.
I’m pleased one member of staff had some common sense about it. And I think you should write and thank her (as well as complaining) as she may have got into trouble for what she did.
As previously said you should get checked out by a doctor

In case it reads like I was excusing the treatment you received I wasn’t - just trying to give some context

Absolutely complain that is bloody horrendous!!!!! We have a public toilet just around the corner from our office so have been told to advise people to go there but use our discretion so obviously elderly or disabled or pregnant people can use it. To be honest I've said yes to everyone who has asked as how am I supposed to know if they have a disability or if they need to go asap. Your situation op was on another level how could they say no?!?! Complain complain complain. Really hope you are ok.

They should have looked after you.

It’s all been said with some excellent advice, especially from WettyHainthrop. I just had to add my very best wishes to you as what you went through must have been so awful and humiliating. Thank goodness the one staff member was kind and helped you. Take care and good luck in the future.

I suggest you write a review with pseudonym. A disabled person dies not have to prove it and right then you were disabled . They were appealing tell us the name ply. we can avoid them

OP I am so sorry for your loss and how awfully you were treated

I would make sure your complaint goes straight to their regional manager if you can. If you complain to Head office it often gets pushed back to store management and we all know stores can be quite silo'ed in making sure the stores rep stays intact.

Thats the best advice I can offer right now but if I think of anything more I will come back!

Sorry for spelling
You didn’t have to prove disability
They were appalling

Complain. Times a million. You deserve an apology, and full-hearted one, and you will be helping women who follow you in all sorts of distress. I appreciate this requires emotional effort as well as the time and energy, but if nothing else complain for your own closure.
I am truly horrified you were treated this way.
I hope it's not my optician (!)
Most importantly, I hope you are okay now, physically and emotionally. Sending warm thoughts and wishes (or would you prefer cool ones?!)

DP tried to call the store after to complain, they never returned his call despite someone saying the manager would call back. They never called back

It was one of the big optician chains (beginning with S ) you'd think they'd know better!

I've complained, mentioned the lovely female store assistant and I'll have her jacket dry cleaned and posted along with some flowers and a thank you card. Bless her heart ❤️

I had a haemorrhage due to remains of conception left will need a D&C.

OP that is awful. I do hope you are OK now. Thankfully you met someone with a shred of humanity and decency about them, but what of the first two? I really would complain - if it is a large brand they should have staff training in place as to how to deal with emergencies like this. There is just no excuse on either a human level or a corporate level for how you were treated. Complain, but do praise the staff member who treated you well. The others are just inhuman, training or no training.

So sorry op

I'm glad you complained but sorry you had to.

How awful for you to be treated so badly after all you've been through. Complain to the CEO of the company via email so that its recorded. You should be able to Google it to find their email address. Hope you are treated soon and begin to feel better soon.

God you poor thing!! Absolutely disgusted by their treatment of you.

So sorry for your loss too OP.

Tweet them. They should be fucking ashamed of themselves

Oh you poor thing. I’ve been there but fortunately I was at home at the time (bathroom looked like a murder scene). This was after an ERPC following an incomplete miscarriage. Yes, complain to Specsavers, their treatment of you was appalling. Also, make sure you get antibiotics after your procedure. I wasn’t given any after my my initial ERPC and the gynae told me that was a major contributor to my subsequent infection and huge loss of blood.